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Seeking financing for my new feature-length film ‘Lost People Screaming At Their Nüvi to Shut the Fuck Up’. 2:49 AM Dec 9th from web |
Why is The Simpsons sucking so hard?Twentieth year slump? Writers strike catching up with us? Why? Why? 10:07 AM Dec 8th from Tweetie |
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Exit row, on the aisle, beside an empty seat. All is forgiven Easyjet, let's hug it out. 2:52 AM Dec 6th from Tweetie |
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ALSO. When drinking in unlicensed after hours Soho with Keith Talent/John Self types, do NOT suggest Morrissey is a homosexualist. NOT. 11:33 AM Dec 5th from twitterrific |
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The entire British service industry now flashes a brittle smile whilst mentally calling you a twat in Polish. 12:47 PM Dec 3rd from Tweetie |
According to the signage the caf´e I am in is known for it’s baquettes. 12:26 PM Dec 3rd from web |
Turns out the literal translation of Wagamama goes, ‘don’t wear white underpants the following day’. 10:26 AM Dec 3rd from web |
I am in roughest Reading, unarmed, no petrol with which to bargain. Rats the size of children. Tell Gail I love h 3:05 PM Dec 2nd from Tweetie |
1. Bunghole Stretchers 13
2. Whoops I Bit It Again
3. Non C’est Ma Bite
4. HR Reps Gone Wild
5. Om Nom NO TOO BIG
6. Huge Mounds O’Breast... 2:23 PM Dec 2nd from twitterrific |
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Could do a huge greasy vindaloo &c. from the place downstairs, but am sticking with this lo-carb locally grown Waitrose salad. Yep. Yep. 11:29 AM Dec 1st from twitterrific |
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