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It's not Christmas with out Karen Carpenter. |
Phew! Macbook back from wherever they send these things. Interwebz here I come! |
Somewhere a man named Barack Obama sits on a toilet and thinks the same thing I do: I need to trim my toe nails. |
Why do they say, "I'm Prairie Doggin' it", when "I'm doin' a turdle!" would make more sense. And be punny. |
You may all return to your previously scheduled poop jokes, sex references, and general vulgarity. |
"But Daddy, Obama's kids are getting a puppy, why can't I?" Because Daddy voted for McCain. |
I can't remember the last time I was this proud to be an American. I am so proud of all of us. |
READY THE SHOT GLASSES AMERICA. |
When they call it for Barack, we all do a shot. |
Please make the right choice today. |
Is it too early for nachos? |
For some reason my farts smell like dog food. I don't think I ate any |
What would be a funny name for a garbage man? |
Halloween is good because I can pretend I'm buying candy to give away. |
When it comes to sex my only rule is no ifs, ands, or butts. Literally. |
Dude, those new Macs are super sexxay. |
People peeeeeeople, get it straight. The saxophone is the devil's tool. Duh. That's why it's the only instrument capable of the brown note. |
So basically jazz is amazing. But only old jazz! None of this midi bullshit. Fuck you smooth jazz. |
Common Consensus: Excedrin Migraine. Thank you! |
Guys, what's the best headache medicine? |
