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Dating Violence

Violence Against Women Home > Types of Violence > Dating Violence

Dating violence is when one person purposely causes physical or psychological harm to another person they are dating, including sexual assault, physical abuse, and psychological/emotional abuse. It is a serious crime that occurs in both casual and serious relationships, and in both heterosexual and same-sex relationships. Sometimes, a victim might unknowingly be given alcohol or "date rape" drugs like Rohypnol. Date rape drugs are often slipped into a victim's drink while a person is in a social setting such as a club or party. These drugs, as well as alcohol, can make a person unable to resist assault, and cause a type of amnesia so she is uncertain about what happened. The victim is then left to deal with the trauma of the sexual assault and the uncertainty surrounding the specifics of the crime. Unfortunately, most cases of dating violence are not reported to the police. See our Date Rape Drugs FAQ for more information.

If you or someone you know has been the victim of dating violence, seek help from other family members and friends or community organizations. Reach out for support or counseling. Talk with a health care provider, especially if you have been physically hurt. Learn how to minimize your risk of becoming a victim of dating violence before you find yourself in an uncomfortable or threatening situation. And, learn about how to get help for sexual assault and abuse. Another important part of getting help is knowing if you are in an abusive relationship. There are clear signs to help you know if you are being abused.

Additional Information on Dating Violence:

Publications

1.   Dating Abuse Fact Sheet - This fact sheet on dating violence includes statistical information regarding the scope of the problem, describes characteristics of victims and abusers, and provides references for additional information.

   http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/dvp/DatingViolence.htm

2.   Toolkit to End Violence Against Women - This toolkit provides concrete guidance to communities, policy leaders, and individuals engaged in activities to end violence against women. Numerous experts in the fields of sexual assault, domestic violence, and stalking reviewed the recommendations in this Toolkit.

   http://toolkit.ncjrs.org/

3.   A Parent's Guide to Teen Dating Violence: 10 Questions to Start the Conversation (Copyright © Liz Claiborne, Inc.) (PDF – 100KB) - This guide, from Liz Claiborne’s “Love is Not Abuse,” helps parents open the lines of communication about dating violence.

   http://loveisnotabuse.com/pdf/10questions_hand.pdf

4. Campus Dating Violence Fact Sheet (Copyright © NCVC) - This fact sheet describes what dating violence is, its victims, incidence, reporting, and dating violence and the law.

   http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/AGP.Net/Components/documentViewer/Download.aspxnz?Docume...

5.   Dater's Bill of Rights (Copyright © NCPC) - This short tip sheet explains that you have the right to look and act the way you want, whether it is while you are on a date or in a relationship. Reading its simple affirmations can help you remember that you can make your own decisions.

   http://www.ncpc.org/cms/cms-upload/ncpc/files/billofrights.pdf

6. Dating and Domestic Violence (Copyright © RAINN) - This fact sheet gives the definition of domestic violence and other commonly used terms for abuse. It provides an outline of reasons for why victims stay in a harmful relationship and a check-list of behavioral signs of abuse. Additional resources are provided for further information.

   http://www.rainn.org/get-information/types-of-sexual-assault/dating-and-domestic-...

7. Dating Violence: Can Teens Access Protection Orders? (Copyright © NCVC) - This publication contains information about protections orders and teen access. It lists statistics for each state about who can file, what the order is called, how long the orders last, and links to the statutes.

   http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/AGP.Net/Components/documentViewer/Download.aspxnz?Docume...

8. Is it Abuse? Dating Violence (Copyright © NCVC) - The information in this brochure educates young adults on how to identify violence and abuse in relationships. It also provides the telephone number to a helpline for individuals who are in need of help.

   http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/AGP.Net/Components/documentViewer/Download.aspxnz?Docume...

9. Teen Dating Violence Fact Sheet (Copyright © NCVC) - This fact sheet describes what dating violence is, the incidence of teen dating violence, it's victims, dating violence and the law, and who can help.

   http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/AGP.Net/Components/documentViewer/Download.aspxnz?Docume...

10.   Tough Talk: What boys need to know about relationship abuse (Copyright © www.loveisnotabuse.com) - Developed by Liz Claiborne Inc., the content-rich handbook includes a clear definition of relationship abuse, as well as practical guidelines and suggested questions for men to use when starting a conversation with the boys in their lives about the subject of abuse. Resources for additional information and support are also provided, including Web site addresses and phone numbers for national domestic violence prevention organizations.

    http://loveisnotabuse.com/pdf/tt_brochure.pdf

Organizations

1.   Choose Respect, HHS, CDC
2.   Enditnow.gov
3.   Office for Victims of Crime
4.   Office on Violence Against Women, OJP, DOJ
5. Dating Violence Resource Center
6. Family Violence Prevention Fund
7. National Center for Victims of Crime
8. National Crime Prevention Council
9. National Domestic Violence Hotline
10. Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network

= Indicates Federal Resources

Content last updated September 1, 2007.