Like a lot of guys, Adam Porras relies on his wife for support. The retired 20-year Army veteran, who struggles with injuries from a rocket that exploded near him in Afghanistan, makes it clear just how important she is to him.

“She’s my lifeline,” he said, adding that taking care of him is like taking care of an adult-sized child. “Honestly, if it wasn’t for her, I’d probably be homeless under a bridge somewhere or even dead.”

Donna Porras was one of about 20 caregivers of traumatic brain injury (TBI) patients honored for their efforts during the Caregiver Recognition Luncheon at Fort Belvoir, Virginia, May 7, 2015. Many of the caregivers, mostly military wives, have sacrificed jobs and careers to stay home with their loved one, or they’ve had to find employment to support the family. The luncheon was just a small way to recognize those in the Fort Belvoir Community Hospital Brain Wellness Center’s program that has, in its first year, served 35 caregivers who moved through the program as their spouses received TBI treatment.

“Being a caregiver is not the easiest thing in the world,” said Donna, also a veteran. She added she’s been a caregiver all her life, helping her father, a Vietnam War veteran, and her grandfather, a World War II veteran, and now her husband. “It’s a very big stressor. It’s heartbreaking, frustrating, but sometimes it’s joyful. And I try to help other caregivers by listening and helping find the support they need.”

Donna hoped the military is also listening to the concerns of caregivers. During the luncheon that certainly seemed to be the case as James Rodriguez, deputy assistant secretary of Defense for Warrior Care Policy, took questions from the caregivers in attendance.

“I can’t understate the value of what our spouses do,” he said. “As far as the Department supporting them, we are in a good place. But we can be in a better place. We know we can do more. And we need your input to let us know what we need to do, as far as DoD and congressional support.”

The caregivers were quick to take Rodriguez up on his solicitation of feedback, as they spent about half an hour asking him about some of the gaps they see in the system. He acknowledged the areas where the military could do a better job supporting these spouses, and encouraged the use of all available support groups, military and civilian. Rodriguez also encouraged the caregivers to lean on each other and make sure they take care of themselves. “If you don’t take care of yourself and your family, you can’t take care of that service member.”

Adam is glad his wife received this recognition, but he added that she doesn’t get enough credit for all she does.

“She does everything and anything,” he said. “She means the world to me.”