Living

These unique flavors will help you mix up your New Year's diet plan

Dieting and losing weight are, by leaps and bounds, the No. 1 New Year’s resolution in America, with 13 percent of people saying they plan to do it. But most don’t manage to keep those resolutions, and we think it’s because they don’t have enough interesting food to add to their newly resolved diets. So in an attempt to help those of you planning to change what you eat next week, FWx is bringing you six hot foods that will perk up those resolutions to eat right in 2015—at least for the first week.

1. Kelp noodles: These crunchy, clear noodles made from sea algae have the wonderful benefit of being crazy low in calories, gluten-free, fat-free and easy to dose with big flavors, such as a spicy peanut sauce or a simple lemon-and-pepper sauce. While kelp doesn’t have any protein, it is an excellent source of iodine, vitamin K. The noodles come in a bag and are easiest to buy online, but they’re beginning to crop up in local markets.

2. Green tea yogurt: Many people claim that green tea is the healthiest thing you can drink because of its high concentration of catechins—antioxidants that are said to fight and prevent cell damage. Now you can eat your green tea. This January, Chobani is launching their newest limited-batch flavor: green tea Greek-style yogurt. Green tea and dairy actually go well together (no surprise to anyone who has had green tea ice cream). One container has 140 calories and is made with 2 percent milk fat yogurt. Look for it in most major markets—or, if you’re in New York, at their yogurt bar in SoHo.

3. Savi seeds: The savi seed isn’t a nut, but it tastes like one, which means it’s perfect for anyone with a nut allergy. These seeds grow from star-shaped pods and are native to the Amazon rain forest, where they’ve been consumed for centuries. One ounce of savi seeds delivers 9 grams of plant-based protein, 5 grams of dietary fiber and 6 grams of omega-3, which is more than you’ll get from salmon or fish oil supplements.

4. Cricket anything (flour, powder, bars): Some call this the gateway bug because with the various ways they are processed, they are the insects that are the least likely to make you recoil. These cute creatures are typically roasted and then ground up, making for an excellent source of protein and fiber. They also provide more iron than beef, but unlike beef, they’re low in cholesterol and saturated fats. The bugs come in all kinds of diet-friendly concoctions: flour and cookies from Bitty Foods, powder from All Things Bugs, protein bars from Exo and Chapul and chips from Six Foods.

5. Oysters: No. 5 on our list should bring cheers all around, if only for the sheer number of oyster-based happy hours cropping up. As long you limit your alcohol, you’ll find oysters to be a super healthy appetizer or snack. Six medium raw oysters range from 43 to 58 total calories, and these delicacies are high in both zinc and omega-3. The best news? January is an exceptional month to be eating these guys because, like the rest of us, they’ve been putting on weight to keep warm in the winter.

6. Wood ear mushrooms: This common Asian ingredient is also called tree ear mushroom. In Chinese medicine, these are said to improve breathing, circulation and well-being. The ear-shaped cap is stemless and dark brown to black in color, and you can find them dried, like you would shiitake mushrooms. The beauty of wood wear mushrooms—and others like them—is that they’re a perfect way to add texture to any dish without unwanted calories. We can get behind anything that ups our well-being and not our weight.

This article originally appeared on FWx.com.

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• 5 Worst Excuses for Not Eating Gluten
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Keep yourself moving to fight jet lag

Melissa Barnes, Twitter‘s head of global brands, shares her business travel tips, from how she fights jet-lag to her go-to app.

Q: How often do you travel?

A: Between 50% and 60% of my time is on the road.

Q: What is your go-to travel app?

A: American Airlines app. I’ve checked into many a flight as I’m speeding to the airport. (Disclaimer: I’m usually in the back of a cab and not driving when I’m checking in via my phone.)

Q: What are your must-pack items?

A: A charger for my Mac, an international converter, workout clothes, a pair of heels, and a good dress. And I’m always packing a few extra super chargers for my phone. As long as I’ve got power, I can figure the rest out.

Q: Any tips for packing for a business trip?

A: Carry-on, always. I have a bag that’s always about 75% packed. I have two sets of toiletries, two pairs of running shoes, etc. so that I can have one set on standby in my suitcase. I never pack a hair dryer—every hotel has one. And as much as I love holding a real book in my hands, when I’m traveling for work, I read everything on e-book.

Q: Airport lounge amenity you can’t live without?

A: Showers can be a lifesaver. They make you feel instantly human when you’ve just come off a long flight and have another leg to go.

Q: How do you stay healthy on the road?

A: Wash your hands. Frequently.

Q: Any tips for fighting jet lag?

A: Seek out natural light to reset your clock. Go for a run in the morning. Keep your blinds open during the day. I love to walk a city, so that’s another way to be in the sunlight and also stay awake—if you’re moving, you can’t fall asleep.

Q: What are your red-eye survival tactics?

A: I’m terrible at sleeping on planes, so it’s really more about what happens immediately after I get off the red-eye. I always call the hotel ahead of time to let them know I’ll be checking in early. And in a perfect world, there’s enough time to take a shower before I go into my first meeting of the day.

Q: Favorite airport?

A: Spokane, Washington. I grew up in Idaho, and that’s what I fly in and out of to see my family. When I land there it means I’m home.

Q: Favorite airline cabin?

A: Given how much I travel, I should pay attention to these things, but I don’t. Just get me there.

Q: What is one amenity from a hotel or airline that really makes you feel understood as a business traveler?

A: Rush dry cleaning.

Q: Who are you loyal to?

A: American. I actually don’t do loyalty programs for hotels. I think when you stay at the same chain with the same amenities and design in every city, you start to forget where you are. Give me a boutique hotel in a great neighborhood every time.

Q: What’s the most valuable perk that comes with your status?

A: Problem solving. Just this morning I had a flight cancelled out of SFO. They instantly rebooked me, but the flight they initially put me on had me landing after I was due to make a big presentation. I called the American Executive Platinum desk and they immediately booked me on a flight on a different airline that got me there in time. Some of my team members who were on the same flight and didn’t have status weren’t so lucky.

Q: What drives you crazy every time you travel?

A: The overhead speakers in airports. Don’t they know I’m on a call?

Q: Hotel breakfast standby?

A: Black coffee. Yogurt.

Q: Favorite in-room dining indulgence?

A: The Charlotte Street Hotel in London has these grapefruit candies that are addictive. I can’t not eat them.

This article originally appeared on Travel + Leisure.

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• 20 Ways to Travel Better
• Coolest Airline Amenity Kits
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From buzzing phones to blinking lights, here are the real reasons you're not getting enough shut-eye

Most healthy-living formulas consist of two basic tenets: Eat less and move more. Truthfully, it should be more of a three-pronged approach: Eat well, move more, and get adequate sleep. The first two steps are made more effective by the third—and when you don’t have enough sleep, food and movement aren’t enough to keep your body feeling well and performing at its optimal level.

Unfortunately, getting good sleep is a struggle many of us face, and it’s not entirely a modern dilemma. Yes, blinking cell phones, bright alarm clocks, and dinging computers are relatively new in human history and may make the bedroom less relaxing and more taxing, but other factors can interfere with your sleep pattern, too. This month, get serious about getting more shut-eye. Here are some real solutions to the most common sleep obstacles.

1. Lights

“Light at night can delay your circadian rhythm, or your body’s natural clock,” says Kelly Glazer Baron, PhD, assistant professor of neurology at the Northwestern University Feinberg School of Medicine. The color of the light may make the biggest difference. Evidence suggests our bodies are most sensitive to blue light, which is emitted from many popular light sources, including energy-efficient bulbs and computer screens.

The fix: Turn down your lights an hour or so before bed. Hang blackout curtains or wear a sleep mask if light shines continuously.

2. Technology

You’ve probably heard that your tablet, smartphone, and other small-screen devices could be responsible for bouts of insomnia—the lights they emit are mostly on the brain-activating blue wavelength. Still, the National Sleep Foundation says more than 95% of Americans use some type of tech gadget within an hour before going to bed. The more time you spend on the devices, the more wired your brain will be, and the more wired your brain is, the less sleep you’re likely to get.

The fix: Check Facebook one last time at least an hour before you tuck in. Then turn off your device and give it a rest until morning. “You can also download programs like f.lux (justgetflux.com) that can change the spectrum of your computer screen to reduce the blue light,” says Baron.

3. Temperature

The body’s core temperature decreases as we sleep. If it’s too warm in your bedroom, your body can’t cool properly, and people with a higher core body temperature are more likely to experience insomnia and sleeplessness.

The fix: The ideal bedroom temperature, says Baron, is around 65°. As a bonus, a colder bedroom may boost your metabolism. A recent study in Diabetes found that people who sleep in cool rooms–66°–have increased metabolism and energy expenditure even in their waking hours.

4. Stress

Unfortunately, anxiety can create a cycle of sleeplessness: It makes sleep more difficult, and sleeplessness drives up anxiety. “Worry and rumination interfere with the ability to relax and go to sleep, and then stress can cause middle-of-the-night awakenings and waking up too early,” says Baron.

The fix: Here’s a throwback relaxation technique that’s worth a try: lullabies. A study in the International Journal of Nursing Studies found that people who listened to soothing music for 45 minutes before their bedtime spent more time in restorative REM sleep. And if you still can’t sleep, don’t wallow in your sheets. “Get out of bed until you feel sleepy,” says Baron. “While you’re out of bed, do something fairly nonstimulating, like reading a book. Wait until you’re sleepy; then get back in bed.”

Is 8 Hours Really Necessary?

Most likely it is. “Researchers amazingly still don’t know how much sleep is enough,” says Baron. “But studies consistently show that less than five hours per night is associated with negative health effects, and it looks like six to eight hours is associated with the best outcomes.”

But what about people who swear they don’t need more than five hours of sleep a night? “They may be using caffeine and other techniques to stay awake during the day. They really could use the sleep and are just masking it,” says Baron. “People never get accustomed to sleep loss, but they do become less aware of how impaired they are, even if performance continues to decline.”

This article originally appeared on CookingLight.com.

News stories about the debate over the DREAM act, the tens of thousands of children who arrive unaccompanied in the U.S. each year and even the backlash against immigrants in Europe after the Charlie Hedbo killings can raise all kinds of questions and stir up all kinds of emotions for kids. This is especially true when they involve children being separated from their parents.

We talked with William Perez, Professor of Education at Claremont Graduate University and author of Americans By Heart: Undocumented Latino Students and the Promise of Higher Education, for his tips on starting good conversations with kids about immigration.

Elementary age kids won’t grasp the more abstract issues surrounding immigration, Perez says. So conversations with them can begin with the fact that almost everyone living in the U.S. today comes from a family of immigrants – including theirs. “A good start would be discussing their family’s history of migration to the U.S.,” he says. “Why did they first come? What were the conditions in the country of origin?” From there, the discussion can widen “to conversations about contemporary migration, and the reasons families decide to live in a new country.”

Middle school kids can wrestle with more complex issues, says Perez, so parents can encourage them to broaden their horizons, by “reading narratives from families of different backgrounds about their immigration experiences.” And all the stories don’t have to come from the pages of a book. Middle school is also a great time, says Perez, for students to start “asking friends, classmates, or extended family members about their migration experiences.” How did their friends’ families come to this country? What was the experience of their grandmother, grandfather, aunts and uncles?

High school students “should begin to understand how immigration policies affect immigrants and their families,” says Perez. Families can discuss questions like why do some states have pro-immigrant laws while others have anti-immigrant laws? Perez also suggests that high school students read news stories about immigration from different sources, regions, and countries. Parents can encourage them to absorb what they read by asking questions like “Do these sources talk about immigration in different ways? If so, how? And why?” (One place to start might be this story in New York about an immigrant family who works fast food jobs in Texas.)

The bottom line, according to Perez: make sure that kids understand that immigration didn’t stop at Ellis Island. “Teaching about the history of immigration is important,” he says. But it’s also very important to help kids connect that history and current policies to their families and community.

High design and haute cuisine meet crackling fires and snow-covered vistas in these European winter destinations

Europeans have dreamt up many definitions of cozy. Denmark has hygge, a concept that evokes “coziness when relaxing with good friends.” Germany, Austria, and Switzerland have gemütlich, which translates to “comfortably homey.” And Bulgaria has its уют, which means “snug.”

In other words, when the temperature drops, there’s a special appeal to hightailing it to Europe, where the art form of coziness has been perfected over the course of a few thousand winters. From the Ardennes to the Alps, woodsy retreats with crackling fireplaces, steamy thermal baths with pine-scented steam rooms, and wood-paneled inns where bubbling pots of fondue and shots of schnapps have long warmed locals and propelled many travelers to cross an ocean for a taste.

Still, the concept of a European winter getaway is changing. Seaside towns and off-season resort areas are seeing an uptick of visitors who come for digital detoxes and crowd-free retreats that can cost a quarter as much as a ski weekend. Sagres, in Portugal, for instance, is experiencing an increase in visitors, namely golfers seeking a bit of cool January sun and surfers coming for the winter swells. Croatia’s Istrian coast, meanwhile, attracts flocks of Zagreb creative types thanks to the significant off-season savings at its seaside and design-forward hotels.

Find out why there’s no winter like a European winter—especially in these towns.

Åre, Sweden

With its snow-covered peaks, café-lined town square, and red-hot après-ski scene, this mountain resort in northern Sweden is the Aspen of Scandinavia. There are more than 100 powdery ski runs, or you can navigate the slopes by snowmobile or dogsled: Explore Åre and Camp Åre are two top outfitters that can arrange tours. After dark, a lively crowd congregates over pints of Swedish Brekeriet beer at Hotel Fjällgården, where DJs keep the place thumping late into the night. For a quiet evening, curl up with a mug of glogg in one of the candlelit nooks at Thyras Salong, in the Tott Hotel. A five-minute walk away, chef Markus Aujalays runs Fjällpuben, a cozy restaurant with a farmhouse feel that serves dishes like tender elk carpaccio with currants and pickled beets. You’ll find several sophisticated hotels in town, but for a true northern adventure, consider spending a night at Igloo Åre, where the beds are made of packed snow covered in plush sleeping bags and reindeer skins, and private guides lead early morning snowshoe hikes. If the thought of ice blocks leaves you cold, there’s the new wood- and-glass Copperhill Mountain Lodge by American architect Peter Bohlin, a high-design ski-in, ski-out chalet with huge stone fireplaces, furnishings by the likes of Tom Dixon and Patricia Urquiola, and spa “tee-pees” that pay homage to the region’s indigenous Sami tribe. Book a Samezen massage, which uses warm stones and plant extracts, then take in the mountain views from a hot-spring-fed pool. —Ingrid K. Williams

Vals, Switzerland

You don’t come to this tiny village in the Swiss Alps to ski. Instead of perfectly groomed pistes, you’ll find a wonderland for design buffs. Built from sparkling gray blocks of Vals quartzite, Pritzker Prize winner Peter Zumthor’s austerely beautiful Therme Vals houses a warren of steamy hammams and flower-strewn pools. Last fall, the on-site hotel was rebranded as the 7132 Hotel, with furniture by Fritz Hansen and Eero Saarinen, a restaurant that serves dishes like Öra salmon with beets and spinach, and new rooftop suites designed by Japanese architect Kengo Kuma. If your taste tends toward fewer hard surfaces and right angles, the four-room Brücke 49 embodies the distinctive Danish ethos of hygge, or coziness, but with some Midcentury-inspired flair: Finn Juhl chairs, 1960s Le Klint lamps, Vola showers, and William Morris wallpaper. Do as the locals do and earn your fondue with a 45-minute hike from the hotel along farm roads to Restaurant Ganni, an 18th-century timber mountain lodge. After a pot of silky cheese spiked with ginger, porcini, or traditional kirsch, throw back avieille prune (cask-aged plum brandy) digestif to fortify you for the walk back down. —Adam H. Graham

Snæfellsnes Peninsula, Iceland

Jutting west into the North Atlantic Ocean, the Snæfellsnes peninsula is Iceland at its most stunning: moss-blanketed lava fields, misty fjords surrounded by craggy cliffs, and a towering volcano crowned with a glacier that dates back to the Ice Age. Do it as a road trip, starting with a night at the fire-engine-red Hotel Egilsen, in the tiny fishing town of Stykkisholmur. The inn’s 10 cozy rooms have a New England vibe, decorated as they are in light blues and greens, and original sketches of local landmarks by Icelandic artist Tolli line the walls. Across the street, Narfeyrarstofa, with its doilies and lace curtains, may look like someone’s grandmother’s house, but the restaurant serves the best lamb stew in town. It’s about an 80-mile drive around the tip of the peninsula—past waterfalls and golden beaches—to Hotel Búðir, the region’s game-changing property. The 17th-century trading post turned 28-room lodge is a destination in itself, with views of the Snæfell glacier or bay from every window, sitting areas with deep leather sofas and scores of old National Geographics to flip through, and a lobby bar with one of the country’s largest whiskey collections. If you’re looking to knock the northern lights off your bucket list, you’re in luck: an overnight concierge will wake you up for the show. —Brooke Porter Katz

The Cotswolds, Cheltenham

Once a popular spa getaway for well-heeled Londoners, Cheltenham fell out of favor with the rise of its trendier neighbors Daylesford and Chipping Norton. But with the opening of No. 38 The Park, the historic town in the northern Cotswolds is back in the spotlight. The brainchild of Sam and Georgie Pearman, the Regency building has 13 bedrooms, elegantly done with reclaimed-wood tables, freestanding Victorian bathtubs, and David Hockney prints. For dinner, make your way to sister property No. 131, where locals gather in a buzzy, low-lit dining room for regionally sourced dishes. Beyond the hotel, there’s plenty to explore, including the housewares and antiques shops in the neighborhoods of Montpelier and Suffolk. Don’t miss Guild at 51, full of handmade textiles and silverwork. Or tour the recently renovated Wilson, an art space showcasing both British Arts and Crafts and emerging artists. For lunch, Purslane serves a standout Cornish pollack with wood-roasted celeriac and chanterelles; come nighttime, it’s all about Daffodil, an Art Deco–style restaurant and bar known for its martinis and live jazz. —Sarah Miller

Courchevel, France

Bernard Arnault, the CEO of LVMH, is not known for taking foolish risks. So when he decided to give the hotel business a try with the ultra-luxe Cheval Blanc Courchevel, he set his sights on Courchevel’s most glamorous zip code, Le Jardin Alpin. Its north-facing slopes are among the best, its network of ski lifts the most efficient, and its habitués the most monied in all of Europe. With Arnault’s imprimatur and designer Sybille de Margerie’s bright, futuristic interiors, the property was a big- enough deal to lure chef Yannick Alléno from Paris’s Michelin three- starred Le Meurice to open Le 1947, where traditional French dishes get a modern spin. Just up the mountain,L’Apogée Courchevel bears the dual stamp of Parisian designers India Mahdavi and Joseph Dirand. The 55 timbered rooms and suites are surprisingly casual, decorated in a burgundy, green, and gingham palette, while the two chalets have log fires, perfect for curling up beside after a long day on the mountain. Courchevel’s equally polished town center is lined with high-end boutiques, including Isabel Marant and Ski Dior, and the bakery Maison Braissand is an essential stop for its buttery pain au chocolat. —Alexandra Marshall

Read the full list HERE.

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Slumber particularly helps with math, says a new study.

Sorry, parents, but you might need to start enforcing bedtime. Or letting your kids sleep in.

While no one likes a bedtime battle, a new study shows that a good night’s sleep can translate to improved academic performance. Researchers at McGill University and the Douglas Mental Health University Institute in Montreal found that children who had a better quality sleep performed better in math and languages.

Specifically researchers found a link between academic performance and something called sleep efficiency, which is more or less how well you sleep at night. “Sleep efficiency is the proportion of the amount of time you slept to the amount of time you were in bed,” says clinical psychologist Reut Gruber, lead author of the study. “Simply put, you go to bed, you lie down and spend time in bed, but if you’re not able to sleep through the time in bed, that’s not efficient sleep.”

“Short or poor sleep is a significant risk factor for poor academic performance that is frequently ignored,” says Gruber, and while there are other studies out there that linked sleep and academic performance, she wanted to take a slightly different tack. “I wanted to look at specific subject areas, not to lump them together, knowing that different skills are needed for different subjects.”

When it comes to math and language skills specifically, Gruber says, it’s a question of brain anatomy. “For math and languages, we need to use the skills that are called ‘executive functions’—things like working memory, planning, not being distracted. The hardware that supports those skills is in the pre-frontal cortex of the brain, which is very sensitive to the effects of poor sleep or insufficient sleep.”

So Gruber’s team looked 75 healthy children between the ages of 7 and 11. The children were each given a wristwatch-like device called an “actigraph” that is used to evaluate sleep by monitoring their night time activity, averaged the data over five nights and correlated the data with the kids’ report-card grades.

They then controlled for variables already known to be associated with academic performance—socio-economic status of the parents and the age of the child and used the sleep variables to predict the report cards grades. “Math, English, French, each one separately,” said Gruber. “Then we looked at how much variability in the specific grade or subject was explained by the sleep variables after controlling for the other what we call ‘confounders.’”

What they found was a “significant” performance variable in math and languages that was related to a good night’s sleep. Especially math. “We found that 14% of the variability we found in math …was explained by sleep deficiency,” said Gruber. “It was 7% and 8% for English and French.”

While parents are on the hook for enforcing bedtime, Gruber thinks pediatricians should ask about the quality and quantity of sleep during routine checkups. “I think many kids might have some sleep issues that nobody is aware of,” she says. “Regular screening for possible sleep issues is particularly important for students who exhibit difficulties in math, languages or reading.”

The National Sleep Foundation recommends that children ages five to 12 get 10-11 hours of sleep a night. (Teenagers need about 9 hours, but studies suggest only 15% of them get it.) If your child currently clocks in less than that, it might be time for a bed time reevaluation. In previous studies, Gruber and her team looked at sleep extension—adding hours to sleep time—and while they didn’t look at math, they did study behavior and attention and saw an improvement in both areas.

To develop healthy sleep habits, the National Sleep Foundation suggest parents establish a consistent bedtime routine, emphasize the need for a regular sleep schedule, keep television and computers out of bedrooms and teach children about healthy sleep habits.

Nasty Gal founder Sophia Amoruso is a different kind of #GirlBoss now. The CEO and bestselling author has handed over the keys of her fashion site to president and chief product officer Sheree Waterson, but Amoruso is staying on to oversee the creative and brand marketing departments of the company.

Amoruso made the surprise announcement in a personal video blog on the company’s website. Watch it here:

Thirty-year-old Amoruso’s resignation as CEO comes as a shock, especially in the wake of #Girlboss, her bestselling book about female business leadership. But the company has been struggling this year. Nasty Gal laid off 10% of its employees over the summer, and after years of rapid growth, revenues have plateaued around the $100 million mark. She has told investors to lower their expectations for for fall 2014 revenue, indicating that it would be the same as last year at worst or possibly up 10% at best.

Nasty Gal will still be very much Amoruso’s company, and she is presenting the change as a way to play to her own strengths on the creative and branding side (she wrote that the change “will give me the freedom to feel that I’m using my talents at my best and highest”). Waterson agrees. “I actually see myself as support to Sophia so we can unleash her genius,” Waterson told Re/Code. “Taking over the operation of the company allows Sophia to be out and connecting the brand with our customer and all the other amazing people she meets.”

A Hollywood producer dishes on how you can feel more assertive on the job — even if you only sort of know what you're doing

We’ve all heard the often-repeated fact that women apologize far more than men, especially when something isn’t their fault. But, if you ask me — and I work predominantly with men — women need to stop apologizing unnecessarily and, at the same time, acknowledge that confidence can include wearing some of our emotions on our sleeves. Sure, our insecurities can make us appear weak. But, no matter you’re in an all-male work environment or not, I always say that’s it’s best to fake it until you feel so sure of yourself that others start to feel the same way. That’s how the saying goes, right?

Ahead, I’ve outlined 10 ways that you can feel more confident and assertive on the job — even if you only sort of know what you’re doing.

Be Engaging
First, look your coworkers in the eyes and put your phone away. There is nothing worse than feeling like you’re getting 50% of someone’s attention. And, if you actually engage in conversation during meetings rather than scrolling through Twitter, you might come up with a killer idea.

Be Bold
Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re weak, and faking it when you’re totally lost is never a good idea. Luckily, I’ve always had respect for someone when they were able to admit they didn’t know the answer, so long as they did their due diligence. It’s a huge sign of confidence, and you can’t possibly know everything. I knew nothing about camera cars when I started directing driving shots on Veep; I asked the crew so many questions, and with each answer, I became more confident as a director. Your colleagues would always rather you ask questions than do something incorrectly multiple times.

Be Humorous
Nothing beats laughter when you’re trying to break down walls. There’s comedy in even the darkest of times, and through laughter, we connect with one another.

(MORE: 30+ Buys That’ll Make You Feel Like A Boss)

Be Heard, But Remember To Listen
Speak up — and that doesn’t mean start yelling. Being loud does not mean you’re confident; it just means you’re loud. But, because both men and women have a tendency to talk over each other and interrupt, it’s important to stop, listen, and wait for the to the person to finish what they’re saying. Never, under any circumstances, let people talk over you — no matter their gender. If someone repeatedly interrupts you, just finish your thought while speaking at the same volume. They’ll look like the real jerk if they continue to yell over you.

Be Polite
Say please and thank you, but never apologize unless you’ve done something wrong or made a mistake. Own it and move on. Real confidence is admitting the mistake and making sure it doesn’t happen again, and kindness still goes a long way.

Be A Student
Do your homework and take notes. If I have a meeting, I make sure to read up on the people attending if I don’t already work closely with them. Sometimes, I find out we have mutual friends, or perhaps they did a project I love. Other times, I find out that we worked together before and it didn’t end well. That’s always tricky to navigate, but at least I wasn’t blindsided by it.

(MORE: How To Wear Denim At Work (Without Looking Sloppy))

Be Straightforward
Say what you mean, and mean what you say. Ask for what you want. Don’t waste time wondering why someone didn’t get the hint; instead, just tell the person. In my experience, most people want to help others. They just need to be asked something specific, and within reason. If they don’t reply honestly and kindly (hello, tip number five!) then don’t waste time on them.

Be Thankful For The Job
If you ask me, ego is a bad word, and conceit doesn’t equal confident. I’m thankful every day that I’m working. And, even if you’re not about to thank your boss, be grateful for the opportunity.

Be Supportive Of Your Coworkers
Confidence does not mean you have to be competitive. As you try to get ahead and be noticed at work, remember those people around you are attempting to do the same thing, Still, that doesn’t mean you can’t support each other: Stay away from gossiping and trash talking your co-workers, since it’ll only reflect poorly on you.

(MORE: 9 Tricks To Emailing Like A BOSS)

Be Optimistic
Let’s face it: No one wants to be around the complainer, or the person whose glass is always half empty. If you’re always bitching about your job (and your life), eventually you’ll be eating alone at the lunch table. Then you definitely won’t be feeling confident.

One last tip for the ladies who work with a lot of guys: Be yourself. Don’t try to be one of the guys. You’re not a guy. You are you. You are human, with all your quirks, whether in high heels or sneakers. Makeup or au natural, you have the ability to do this job like no one else. To truly feel confident, you must be comfortable being yourself.

This article originally appeared on Refinery29.com.