 |
|
In hindsight, a chainsaw is probably not the easiest thing to hide under your shirt
|
 |
|
School bus driver arrested for masturbating while driving... with a kid in the bus
|
|
|
 |
|
Lt. Frank Drebin: "Move along, nothing to see here"
|
 |
|
When you burglarize one of the oldest pubs in Britain you give it respect... by leaving a note saying you're sorry for messing up the joint
|
 |
|
Comcast, AT&T and Verizon totally promise not to charge you or create "internet fast lanes" or paid prioritization. Pinkie swear, touch blue make it true, step on a crack break your mother's back
|
 |
|
News outlet reports Maine pizzeria delivers pie to Ebola nurse Kaci Hickox. Coming up next: Pizza will give you Ebola
|
 |
|
I would just like to take a couple of minutes to talk about... MURDER
|
|
|
 |
|
"Hey, who farted and/or died?" An all-too-vivid, smell-based tour of the world's scariest haunted basement
|
 |
|
New Mexico woman visits ER to get tested for Ebola because she was in Africa...two years ago
|
| (JREF) |
|
The truth about ghosts is that they are fiction. Trust me, we've looked. A lot
|
 |
|
Researchers find psychedelic mushrooms allow brains to hyperconnect, walls to breathe
|
| |
|
MTA spokesman says "They were off the mark" when a massive drill bit drilling a well almost ripped through an F Train in Queens. Ya think?
|
 |
|
Photoshop this annoyed angler
|
 |
 |
Pocono Hide and Seek champion in custody
|
 |
|
If you go trick-or-treating at the Indiana Governor's home, don't act surprised if you're given lasagna
|
 |
|
Because there's just not enough batshiat happening in West Africa yet, Burkina Faso's armed forces dissolve parliament after protestors set it on fire
|
| |
|
Remember the heart wrenching story about the terminally ill lady who was going to take advantage of Oregon's assisted suicide law after her husband's birthday? Well, she's not quite ready to get into the cart
|
 |
|
Security guard who shielded politicians by barricading their door during the shooting last week in Ottawa rewarded with free beer, because Canada
|
 |
|
Usually it's cute when your dog follows you everywhere you go. Usually
|
 |
|
Teen finds $2,000 in stashed in pocket of suit, I mean MY suit, at church rummage sale
|
 |
|
Best Korea may be developing sea-based missiles, because they are going to end up in the ocean anyway
|
 |
|
Fark Food Thread: It's time to revisit food requests. Have you seen a fellow Farker talk about something you'd love the recipe to? Always wonder how to make a dish and wonder if anyone has tips? Fire away. This thread's for you
|
 |
|
Man given anti-social behavior order banning him from falling over and pretending to be ill
|
 |
|
Welsh ATM sign accidentally promises "free erections." Bank apologizes for the error, promises to replace it with a new string of unpronounceable random letters shortly
|
 |
|
"What are you in for?" "Rape. You?" "I chased down an owl in a para-glider and kicked his ass in midair"
|
 |
|
Photoshop these caballeros
|
 |
|
Bad: Something other than your dog comes through your doggie door. Worse: It's a man on the run from police. Oh god: And he's naked
|
 |
|
Alright you dirty dreadlocked garden-growing hippies, here is how you make simple organic pesticides using water, soap, garlic and hot peppers and the unwashed sweat of your brow
|
 |
|
It could be worse: we could be French
|
| |
|
Scientists vaccinate wild koalas against chlamydia after abstinence only program fails to stop spread of disease
|
 |
|
Australian military declares Afghanistan "not that dangerous," cuts the pay of soldiers serving combat tours there
|
| |
|
To calm ebola fears, Washington Post rolls out handy interactive tool detailing how likely it is you are to die by various means. Most germane for Farkers, "choking on your own vomit" is included
|
 |
|
Today in 'missing the point:' Rape threats against woman in anti sexual harassment viral video
|
 |
|
Fahk cancer
|
| (Some Guy) |
|
There are a few things you should never do into the wind like spit, pee, and pepper spray an unidentified man at the school you are patrolling
|
 |
|
Just in time for Halloween, the PA coroner is ready to auction off guns used in suicides
|
 |
|
California creates its own Ebola quarantine policy. As if Ebola was the scariest thing in California
|
 |
|
Plane crashes into the Flight Safety building at Wichita airport
|
 |
|
"For a first grader to have to do their homework by the Internet, I just don't think it is right"
|
 |
|
One-legged guy who makes the most awesome Halloween costumes in the world has done it again
|
| |
|
Judge does not buy "we can't say who they're for because it's all very hush-hush" defense and quietly rules that $1.6 million deal for 349 silencers was a scam
|
 |
|
Man and dog stuck in bog says fire log
|
 |
|
Missing boy found safe in South Pacific, was apparently trying to wash that man right out of his hair
|
| |
|
In other news, there's an acceptable blood/ alcohol limit for airline pilots
|
 |
|
Problem: many of your employees don't submit their time cards. Solution: reward their submissions with beer
|
 |
|
The best wines to go with the best Halloween candy
|
 |
|
GeekDad says the original idea for "Exterminite": a five-issue digital comic collaboration came from FARK's Drew Curtis. "When I interviewed Drew for Geek A Week, he had introduced to me the concept of lucid dreaming"
|
 |
|
Why would he need the millions? He's Bruce Wayne
|
| |
|
Remember how your grandmother refused to let you leave the table until you had eaten all your bread crust because she said that was the healthiest part of the bread? Dammit, she was right
|
| |
|
Top Un
|
 |
|
Because you asked, here's how to make a beer keg out of a pumpkin
|
 |
|
If you feel the need to purchase a device that lets you videochat remotely with your pet while being able to dispense him treats, maybe you should just give in and have a child already
|
 |
|
Beautiful woman who was bullied at school for having an ass that was too small dies during ass augmentation surgery, and Subby doesn't want to live on this planet anymore
|
 |
|
Proud of your new job and first paycheck? Sure, take a photo of it and post it on the web. What's the worst that could happen?
|
| |
|
Dad finds out his daughter has been pretending she's a teenager online, publicly posts pictures of her wearing a shirt with "5th grader" and her actual age of 10 years old. Someone did not think his clever plan all the way through
|
 |
|
Oh, thank goodness Salon has decided to tell us where Gamergate went wrong
|
 |
|
Photoshop this ugly ass collection of baby ducks
|
 |
|
Nope. Nope. Nope.... The eel in the anus that has to be surgically removed is a NOPE
|
 |
|
Apple CEO Tim Cook: iGay
|
 |
|
Ten hours of walking in NYC as a man
|
| |
|
Ugly-ass lion cubs born at Seattle's Woodland Park Zoo, looking forward to Detroit's dismantling of the Seahawks in next NFC championship game (pics)
|
 |
|
Illinois teacher wrongly identifies two Jamaican students as "African American." When informed of her mistake, she decides to call them attractive and successful
|
| |
 |
Harry Potter raps, drops wand, 10 points to Gryffindor
|
 |
|
It seems as though somebody at Wal-Mart thought a cash safe on wheels was a good idea
|
| |
|
Want to live like a king in the land of the Scots? Here's a 16th century castle for the price of a one-bedroom flat in London
|
 |
|
For sale: Cozy three bedroom, two full bathrooms, attached garage, 2,300 piece organ built into the walls
|
 |
 |
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 495: "Hallowe'en 6". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
|
