“I wish I had known that this would be such a huge adjustment,” wrote Reddit user forthelulzac about moving from America’s northeast to the southern state of South Carolina.

North v. south in terms of election results, scaled based on number of electoral votes (Creative commons image by Mark Newman, University of Michigan)

The comment sparked a flurry of agreement from both sides of the Mason-Dixon line.  Americans from the north and the south might be citizens of the same country, but, at least according to those who responded to forthelulzac’s lamentation, they’re from two totally different cultures.

“[Meeting someone from New York] was the first time I had literally no clue what anything a person said or did meant.  I couldn’t tell how he felt about anything,” wrote southerner multirachael by way of explanation.  “For Southerners, everything, everything is in the subtext.”

Southerners have a complex system of rituals and social cues, she explained, contrasting this with the more upfront north.  “[I]f you come right out and say what you’re thinking, it’s considered aggressive, confrontational … If a Southerner labels you ‘rude,’ it’s pretty much the worst thing they can call you …”

“It’s about softening things.  It’s about having a ‘nice’ society. It’s about making things ‘pleasant.’”

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“I realized that whatever I said and whatever I did, I was helping create my classmates’ perception of what an Afghan person is,” wrote Abuzar last week of his experience studying at a U.S. high school.  He worked hard every second to “introduce Afghanistan through the eyes of my generation, a generation tired of the animosity and ignorance that had ruled Afghanistan, endeavoring to make the country a better place.”

He’s not the only one. Muhammad wrote in to say he had a similar experience when he went abroad for the first time, thanks to a scholarship to complete his high school education at the United World College in Costa Rica.

Muhammad Jaweed Ahmadi

I was expecting to face many challenges and new life experiences, but I had no idea how to prepare myself. All I knew was that I needed to attend the college if I wanted to achieve the ideal future life that I have always worked for. I did not want to think about whether or not I was going to be welcomed by the community.

Although the prejudice of the West towards Muslims and my country is not something new, the unexpected discrimination was much worse that I imagined. I found myself shocked when I heard a classmate saying, “When I hear the name Islam, terror, killings, aggressiveness, violence, and unequal rights, come to my mind.”
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Introducing myself always felt awkward at first

“Namaste! I am Abhushan and I am from Nepal.”

“Really? Have you ever climbed Mt. Everest?” “Do you live in the mountains?” “Do you pet Yetis back in Nepal?”

“Yes, I am from Nepal.” “No I haven’t climbed Mt. Everest because it is at a whopping altitude of 8850 meters.” “I live in a big sprawling city with a population of almost 1 million people.” “I definitely do not have a pet Yeti. I have a little yipper named “Sheru” who likes to stun and catch birds.”

A year back, these were typical questions that people in the U.S. would fire back at me when I introduced myself and my country to them. Whether it was a normal conversation or an email, such questions almost became inevitable. It was annoying at first, seeing people who have no idea about my country and my culture talk to me so stereotypically. Sometimes, out of rage, I wondered how these people who have no idea about geography are ruling the world right now!

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This post comes from our sister blog, Comité de Estudiantes, and has been translated from its original Spanish. Blogger Ferran Masip-Valls talks about one of the things he has found most different, and disconcerting, about the U.S.

Office is cold. (Creative commons photo by Flickr user Michael Cory)

The United States is crazy. New York rent, by law, includes water and heating, which are the responsibilities of the apartment owner, not the tenant. So when you rent an apartment, you do not have to pay for that water and the heating.

In other words, water and energy are wasted because they are “abstract” goods, which do not affect the consumer at any level.

The coldest time is summer, the warmest season is the winter … indoors at least. In general, one brings a jacket to the office in summer, and will go in short sleeves in winter. Such is the use of heating and air conditioning; extreme use.

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This funny and informative video supposedly comes from a Columbia Business School Orientation in 2008. Topics covered: (1) How to recognize an American; (2) how to greet an American you’ve just met; (3) how to greet an American after having a few beers.

Videos from the rest of the presentation are on the uploader’s YouTube channel (we’ve sleuthed out that his name might be Dan).

With love in the air this week thanks to Valentine’s Day, our Facebook fan Abdirahman reminded us that love is universal. Dating, however, is not.  Romantic life in the U.S. isn’t what you’ve seen in TV and movies, but it might still be different from what you’re used to.

For Sadia, her first Valentine’s Day in the U.S. felt very similar to what she was used to from Pakistan:

Since my childhood I used to see, every year on Feb 14, girls and boys in Pakistan get crazy about Valentine ’s Day. They love buying gifts, like stuffed cuddly teddy bears, chocolate, perfumes, small red heart pillows or cushions, balloons and who can forget bouquet of red roses. This Valentine’s Day I saw the same hype here too, everyone is busy in shopping, getting extra deals in shopping malls, websites are announcing valentine day’s promotions on flower bouquet, fruit baskets, chocolates perfumes, dresses, and list is endless.

But Tara noted, on her personal blog, that Valentine’s Day gifts seemed different in America than back in China. Tara’s Taiwanese friend received a greeting card from her American boyfriend, and was disappointed. In Taiwan and China, it’s more typical to give a concrete gift.

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Before coming to the U.S., some people told me that Americans are very nice, warm and friendly, while others said that the western culture and philosophy is about egoism, highly individualism which means little emotional bonds among people, in other words, Americans are selfish and cold. Those were what I have been told before.

Creative Commons photo by Flickr user MR38

(Neither is true~~~)

After living here for a while, based my observation and feelings, Americans are indeed nicer in some aspects, such as TALKING. It is way too easy to get complimentary words from my dear American friends. Foreign new comers are sure to be flattered all the time all the time, but as time goes by, they will figure out it and become the ones who output nice words.

So newcomers, please take a conservative attitude when people here say you are amazing, great or something is wonderful, perfect. Most of times, it is just a habit of saying like that, the truth is you are still who you are, your worries are still out there, just enjoy the compliment for a second and then get back to real life.

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The University of the Pacific has an online guide for students planning to study abroad, which has information and exercises designed to prepare you for living in a different culture. It probably can’t eliminate culture shock, but it might be useful in preparing you for what types of things could be different.

Even though it’s designed for American students going abroad, it can apply just as well to international students coming to the U.S.

Sometimes being far from home can mean missing out on traditions and holidays.  But some colleges make efforts to bring the traditions and holidays to you.

On i-studentlife, Ronak Jain explains the Indian celebration of Diwali and how he was pleasantly surprised to find a Diwali festival in his dorm.

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“Are you against the American Way?”

A friend of mine asked me this as I sat down for breakfast in our college’s dining hall. He’s something of a jokester; what he tried to refer to was the fact that I didn’t have bacon and eggs, but some cream cheese on English muffins and fruit. It turned into an interesting conversation, though, involving everyone at the table.

What is “the American Way”? My American friends tried to point out how central a tenet freedom is in this country – and opportunity as well.

“You work, and you make something of yourself,” someone said, “And you can get anything you want.”

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How many Americans have ever heard of my home country, Kyrgyzstan? It has been about two months since I arrived in the United States, and in that time I’ve gotten used to people being surprised when I tell them where I’m from.

Papan Reservoir in Kyrgyzstan (Photo by Flickr user RNLJC&M)

Kyrgyzstan is a little, mountainous country that is located in Central Asia. It borders other Central Asian countries such as Kazakhstan, Tajikistan, and Uzbekistan, and also with China in the east. The population of my country is only a little over five million people, and less than one million people live in the capital city Bishkek where I come from. My country is quite small and is not well-known in the world and among Americans, in particular.

In my college in the U.S., and in towns where I go, people ask where I come from. When I say that I am from Kyrgyzstan, many people laugh and think I made up such a country, or that the name is misspelled. I know it may sound funny, but this is true!

I really did not expect that Americans would react this way. Nor did I expect that so very few people here would have heard of my country.

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Setting down my heavy, chock-full plate, I took off my jacket and sat down next to Chen, my friend from China. As usual, she was enjoying a wok dish of fried noodles with chicken and vegetables. I watched as she turned to look at my plate and, in a mocking tone, uttered her latest discovery: “Hoang, you’re so ‘Americanized.’”

I rolled my eyes at her, then at our plates, and burst out laughing. Chen joined in the laugh, seeming to share a mutual understanding. The stark contrast between our plates said it all. On my plate was a sizable cheese burger, sitting on top of a bunch of curly fries, accompanied by plenty of ketchup and pickle slices to round up the over-packed plate. Meanwhile, Chen’s plate looked a little more vibrant with sauteed vegetables and noodles mixed up in some kind of oriental sauce.

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Look left, then right. Check the left again. The white walking man lights up, which signifies safe passage. I cross the road safely and let out a sigh of relief.

(Photo: Flickr user TheTruthAbout...)

Having arrived in Chico, California more than a year ago, I still have trouble crossing the street sometimes. In my country, oncoming traffic arrives from the right – so you’d have to look right first. The driver’s seat is on the right too. Simply put, Malaysians drive on the other (wrong?) side of the road.

It’s true what they say — coming to another country changes you. Not in some physically manifested way, but in simpler ways. Like when you cross the road. Or when you ask for only a fork, instead of a spoon and a fork.

Sometimes you pick up small mannerisms, like a local phrase or saying. I’d never used the words “for sure” so much until I came to Chico.

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