Monoski Camp 2013 Day 5

Another awesome day. Added three new runs to my repertoire. Ryan had me do some sliding drills to work on turn initiation. After that, we went up to the top of Elk Camp and I skied Funnel for the first time. I went from the top of Elk Camp all the way down to the bottom without stopping or falling. Then we took the Village Express up to the top and I skied Banzai Ridge. We had lunch on the mountain. Unfortunately, I didn't hear Ryan screaming at me to turn right and I got too far below the cabin we were headed for. He and Sarah had to push my fat crippled ass up the hill to the cabin.

After lunch, Ryan went off to give some individual instruction to one of the guys who was doing what I used to do a few years ago to initiate a turn. At lunch, Tom who was my ski buddy as an intern and has skied with me as an instructor, asked me how I had broken the habit which was putting my turning rigger too far forward and diving into a turn. I told him I didn't remember what it was Ryan had done to fix the problem.

After lunch we had our group picture taken. In previous camps we had taken the picture with all of us in our monoskis. This year we did it in our chairs. It took less time.

After lunch Sarah and I hooked up with another group and we skied down to the Village Express and took it to the top. Then we skied down to the Big Burn chair and took it up to the top and skied down Mick's Gully. I thought it was my first time down, but Tom told me later that he had taken me down it a few years ago. Hey! I had a stroke! I'm milking that excuse.

I was doing fine (I was shooting up sprays of snow with my uphill rigger and getting sprayed in the face) until I caught one of my riggers and fell. This is a steep run. I must have slid down 40 feet until I was able to catch both my riggers in the snow uphill of me to stop me. After that, I fell two more times. After that, we skied down to the bottom and called it a day.

I'm obviously skiing with much better control that I ever have. I'm not pushing myself. None of my falls would make my top ten list of falls. If Cindy reads this that will make her very, very happy. It makes me pretty happy as well.

I've been sleeping nine hours a night and I take an hour long nap in the afternoon. I'm getting old. I'm the oldest dude here.

Tomorrow should be another great day.

Monoski Camp 2013 Day 4

I had a bit of trepidation this morning. This was the first time I've skied in two years and I was skiing on a new ski. It turned out that this was the best first day I've ever had. Not that I shredded the slopes or anything, and I did do my fair share of falls, but I hadn't lost anything in my two year hiatus. Of course, if I had, I would have blamed it on my stroke. What a great excuse.

I was lucky enough to have Ryan as an instructor and he's taught me a lot over the years. He was easy on me today as he knew that I wanted to ski. Tomorrow, he's promised to work me a little harder.

This is the coldest it's been since I've been coming to Snowmass. I never ski with a lining in my parka so I left it at home. Could have used it. Fortunately, I had another layer to put on so I didn't get cold.

Pulled one of my usual tricks this afternoon. I skied down a blue run, Sneaky's, just fine and then when I got to the bottom, where the terrain got flatter, I fell. My sister saw me do that a few years ago.

My ski buddy is Sarah from South Carolina. She went to Clemson so I told her my Clemson joke that Cindy told to Wahoo, who also went to Clemson.

What does the "n' in Clemson stand for? Nowledge.

So it was a great first day. Hoping tomorrow will be even better.

Monoski Camp 2013 Day 3

Snowmass Village Colorado

Woke up in the middle of the night and had trouble getting back to sleep. Then when I did, I had trouble getting up in the morning. Started out around 7:30. Brrrr! It was cold. 8 above.

Traffic was OK until the Eisenhower Tunnel. On the other side of the tunnel I-70 was covered with snow and there were some icy patches. It was that way until after Vail Pass. Trucks heading east were putting chains on. At the bottom of the valley the road cleared up. Made it to Snowmass by 11:30.

The hotel I always stay at was full so I had to book my reservation at the other hotel. They have renovated it and the room I'm in is very accessible. Actually, it's more accessible than the more expensive one.

Got unpacked and assembled my ski rig. Went over to the Challenge Aspen office and got an intern to come over and take my rig over to the CA equipment room. Had to wait until 3:30 for Ryan to get back from his lesson so we could balance my rig on my new ski.

Got caught up with my old instructor friends, some of whom were interns and my ski buddies at previous camps. It's good to be back. I'm looking forward to tomorrow.

I see the Republicans caved. What a surprise! And there's even more spending.

Ban Subway Trains!

I just read that yet another person was killed by a subway train in New York. When will this carnage stop? It's time to ban subways!

Monoski Camp 2013 Day 2

Denver Colorado.

Awoke this morning and it was freaking cold! In the teens! The two windows on the driver side of the cripmobile were frozen shut. Froze my buns off gassing up. I really miss full service gas stations. It's a pain in the ass, since I can no long stand while pumping gas, I have to get my wheelchair out, which means sidestepping along the car, opening the back (a trick in itself since I have to reach around from the side to do it - at least I don't have to reassemble my chair), and getting my chair out.

Fortunately, by the time I stopped at Mickey D's to get my senior coffee (half price) the driver's window opened.

Driving through Kansas I got a lot of slop on my windshield and my washer didn't work. I put new fluid in the reservoir last month but it either froze or the jets got clogged. It wasn't until the temp got over 25 degrees that it started working. Love seeing the road through the streaks.

I was able to listen to ESPN radio for most of the trip so I was caught up on all the the NFL coaches that got canned yesterday. Some of them were not surprising. For example, Norv Turner in San Diego. He was a good offensive coordinator but this is the second time he's failed as a head coach. I never understood why San Diego hired him in the first place.

Andy Reid? No surprise. Jim Mora Senior said, when his son was the head coach of the Falcons, that Michael Vick was a coach killer. Yep. Jim Mora. Andy Reid. Vick is a great athlete but you never know which Vick will show up. The good one or the crappy one. Lovie Smith in Chicago was a surprise.

Is there some rule on ESPN that every time the Rose Bowl is mentioned that we have to hear that it is the "grand daddy of them all"? After about the 100th time I heard that I wanted to crawl through the radio and slap the shit out of anyone on ESPN who said that.

Got to hear most of the Georgia Nebraska game. Georgia won. Go Dawgs! Got to hear most of the Rose Bowl and saw the last few minutes when I got to the hotel.

This will be the last time that I drive from Atlanta to Denver in two days. Drove over 700 miles today and over 600 miles yesterday. I'm getting too old for that. If I do this next year, I'll stop in Manhattan on day 2 and meet up with the Kansas Redneck.

I didn't sleep well last night (as is usual for my first day on the road) so the drive today took its toll. I wasn't sleepy or anything, but I was glad to get to Denver.

So it looked like McConnell caved and will allow Obunghole to raise taxes and the spending "cuts" will come later. Yeah. I'll bet. The tax increases always pass. The spending "cuts" never materialize.

Oboner: Hey McConnell and Boner, I'll hold this football and you come up and kick it.

I hear Cantor balked at the deal. Maybe there is someone in the Republican Party with a spine.

Monoski Camp 2013 Day 1

Columbia Missouri.

I'm off to Snowmass for the annual Challenge Aspen Monoski Camp. I'm driving this year as I did the last time I attended year before last. I missed last year because of the minor stroke I had. Bummer! The last time I was at Snowmass was for the DAV/VA Winter Sports Clinic back in 2011. Back then, I shipped my monoski rig out via UPS rather than having to schlep it to the airport. Cost a bundle. The TSA managed to destroy the bag I used when I flew when it opened it to inspect it when I traveled a few months earlier. Assholes! Without the bag, if fits in the cripmobile a lot easier.

I love the drive from Atlanta to St. Louis. I've driven it many times since I moved to Atlanta back in 1985. When my mom was alive I used to drive up twice a year, once for Thanks giving and once in the Spring. It used to be Mother's Day and my sister's family would come as well until my nephew got too old to miss a week of school so we changed it to Spring break. The drive was shorter when I lived in my old house and I didn't have to worry about the traffic on I-285 like I do now. Fortunately, there was no traffic this morning and I got away from Atlanta clean.

It started snowing when I hit Illinois and it snowed all the way from there to where I'm staying now. Getting through St. Louis was a pain in the ass since the snow slowed the traffic. It was that heavy wet snow.

I see there is no fiscal cliff deal. Fuck it! Let the tax cuts expire for everyone. The middle class voted for big gummint when they reelected Jug Hussein Ears Downgrade2. Let the middle class pay for it. The rich do not have enough money to pay for the spending binge that our elected officials, of both parties, have embarked on. The real tax money has to come from the middle class. Anyone with the brain of a third grade pissant (which pretty much excludes Obungler supporters) knows that.

Bring it on! You assholes voted to spread the wealth around. You can pay for it! And that includes some of my clueless middle class friends who voted for Obeauzeau. Of course, that's what Obunghole wants. He wants to raise taxes on everyone (except the poor). He just wants to blame it on the Republicans. And Boner and McConnell will let him get away with it.

Happy New Year!

Monday Pun 12-31-2012

This one is from Woody.

An Indian chief was feeling very sick, so he summoned the medicine man. After a brief examination, the medicine man took out a long, thin strip of elk rawhide and gave it to the chief, telling him to bite off, chew,and swallow one inch of the leather every day. After a month, the medicine man returned to see how the chief was feeling. The chief shrugged and said, ...

Off To The Slopes

Heading out bright and early tomorrow for Snowmass Village. Since I now hate to fly (Thanks Moo-slime terrorists and thanks to all the little Hitlers of the TSA), and it's a pain in the ass to fly with my monoski rig, I'm driving out to Colorado. I should be spending tomorrow night in Columbia Missouri.

Saturday Guitar

No music, just a great guitar player schooling a rat bastard commie.

Saturday Blonde Joke

From Randy.

"Doctor!" the blonde patient cried. "I keep seeing spots!"

The doctor scratched his head, paused for a moment, and asked her, "Why have you come to me? Have you seen an opthamologist?"

"No," said the blonde. "Just spots."

Saturday Boobage 12-29-2012