1847 – Samuel Colt sells his first revolver pistol to the United States government.
1863 – Four-wheeled roller skates patented by James Plimpton of New York. Anybody remember “skate keys”?
1885 – The first successful appendectomy is performed by William W. Grant on Mary Gartside. Before this, you just died. Slowly and painfully.
1925 – French psychologist Emil Coue’ brings his self-esteem therapy to US “Every day in every way I am getting better and better”. Yeah! “I’m getting better and better” while I’m letting my country slide down the tubes.
1951 – During Korean conflict, Chinese forces recapture Seoul. We take it back on March 14. Seoul has changed hands four times in less than a year. It went from a population of 1.2 million to 200,000 and was essentially leveled. Made post-Katrina New Orleans look like an urban paradise. Today? wow!
1958 – Sputnik 1 falls to Earth from its orbit. It went up October 4, 1957. That’s a whole four months.
1965 – United States President and notorious lying bastard Lyndon B. Johnson proclaims his “Great Society” during his State of the Union address. If you want to see how great it is, look at the areas that receive the most government dollars.
1968 – Duck hunter accidentally shoots endangered whooping crane in Texas. Tastes like a fishier version of spotted owl.
1971 – Congressional Black Caucus organizes. Functions include acting outraged, protecting crooked politicians and demanding money to get themselves re-elected. They have succeeded mightily.
1989 – Second Gulf of Sidra incident: a pair of Libyan MiG-23 “Floggers” are shot down by a pair of US Navy F-14 Tomcats during an air-to-air confrontation.
2007 – The 110th United States Congress convenes, electing Nancy Pelosi as the first female Speaker of the House in U.S. history. Can you say “Pandering Socialist B*tch”? I KNEW you could…
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