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Lorenz on Leadership: Widows and orphans left behind
Posted 5/30/2011
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Commentary by Gen. Stephen R. Lorenz
U.S. Air Force Academy
5/30/2011 - COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. (AFNS) -- On April 27 in Kabul, Afghanistan, eight United States Air Force Airmen were shot and killed in the same action while serving our great nation and our Air Force. On that same day, three other Americans from our sister services also died in other actions around Afghanistan. These eight Airmen, two Soldiers and one Marine who died that one day in Afghanistan are American heroes who were doing their duty to protect our country while trying to help the Afghan people. They gave the ultimate sacrifice for all of us.
Those service members who gave their lives that one day in April were also individuals who left behind hundreds of people who loved and respected them. I was fortunate to know three of the eight Airmen. One was a member of the Academy Class of 1999 when I was commandant at the Academy, one worked for me at Maxwell Air Force Base, Ala., in our Commanders Action Group and the third had been one of my instructor pilots while flying T-1's at Randolph AFB, Texas.
I was honored to attend memorial services of two of those who died that day: one at Langley AFB, Va., and the other in the Cadet Chapel at the Academy. Both ceremonies, which I am sure represented those held all over the country for the others killed that cold day in April , were professionally accomplished with tenderness, and all the people who attended were sad but proud of the lives these great Airmen had led.
One of the most touching moments at one of the funerals was when the flag of our great nation was presented to the widow. She let out a cry of sadness that cut straight into everyone's heart and then the missing man formation flew over head with such a great roar. There was not a dry eye in the crowd.
At the receptions following the funerals, we all talked about these great Americans. We reminisced and told stories about these Airmen whose lives had ended so abruptly.
As the food was served after the Academy memorial, I noticed the little seven year old daughter of my former cadet who had grown up to fly F-16's and become a husband and a father. His daughter, dressed in her Sunday best, was sitting all alone in the corner of the room playing with a small toy. She look so small and all alone, but was deeply engrossed in her game. She had read a beautiful prayer at the funeral service and everyone in the chapel sat and listened to her read with great pride and sadness. As I watched her, I realized that she did not know how her whole life had changed because of the events of that cold, dark day in Afghanistan halfway around the world. She never again would be able to talk to her Daddy. He never again would be able to tuck her into bed at night. Forevermore, for the rest of her life, when asked about her father she will have to say, " He died fighting for us in Afghanistan".
At the other memorial service at Langley, I was honored to present the Purple Heart to the widow of my deputy CAG chief at Maxwell. He was somewhat older since he was prior enlisted before he became an officer. As I presented the medal to his widow, also an Air Force officer who has served overseas in harm's way, I saw before me her son who was born just a month before his father was killed. This young baby who bears the name of his father, will never know or be held by the father who loved him very much. This young baby will only know his Dad by the stories that others who knew his father will tell him in the future.
We all have a responsibility and duty to celebrate the lives of our Airmen, Soldiers, Sailors, Marines and Coast Guardsmen who have paid the ultimate sacrifice for our nation. However, we also must remember that for every one of them we celebrate, they each left behind moms, dads, wives, husbands and many, many children. In the years to come, please take the time to help those who are left behind. It is the ultimate way to remember those who have sacrificed so much for us all.
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