New Challenges

Deployments

We live in a world where deployments are stretching longer and longer and becoming more and more frequent. This process is difficult and trying for the entire family, regardless of whether it's the first or tenth time a loved one has deployed. As parents, we need to be ready for deployment and make sure our families are ready as well.

Plan ahead. Once you know about a deployment, it's important to start planning. What will childcare look like? How will daily life change? What financial decisions need to be made? Thinking this through beforehand will cause less stress for everyone. In addition, think about taking a family picture, making a family video, or giving your children a special gift before the deployment takes place. These may come in handy once the deployed parent is gone.

Provide them with a sense of stability. When big things change, as they do during a deployment, it's important to keep the small stuff the same. Try to keep the routines you've established as a family intact — bed times, family dinners, etc.

Maintain as much communication as possible. Depending on the situation, make sure your children have ways to communicate with their deployed parent. Encourage them to write letters, send report cards, take pictures, write emails, make and send videos, etc. In addition, you and your children can set up a calendar for a countdown to homecoming day or write in a journal together about things going on at home or feelings they are having about the deployment.

Explain the situation. Depending on the age of your children, be honest with them. Explain where their parent is going and why it is such an important job to do. The more they understand the reasoning behind the separation, the easier it may be to deal with. You are the best judge of how much information to share when it comes to the risks, danger, and other factors that go along with a deployment.

Keep your children active. Your children need positive outlets during the deployment cycle, ways to have fun and to keep them from focusing on how things are different at home right now. Enroll in a fun activity together; take a short trip on the weekend; and stay busy.

Stay healthy. Your children are going to need you more than ever — both physically and emotionally. Make sure you get enough sleep, eat well, and get support and help from others when you need it. 

Get support. Find a support group for you and your family or just reach out to other families experiencing deployment. Plan time to spend with one another, ask each other questions, and listen. In addition, contact the appropriate people in your Service for assistance. For example, your Family Readiness Group (FRG) exists to support families, keep lines of communication open, plan social events and activities, and coordinate deployment farewells and homecomings.