Navy goat to don Army apparel at Torii on Saturday?

By Dave Ornauer
Published: December 8, 2011

Usually, mascot abductions prior to any football game are conducted in covert-operation secret manner.

Thus, it came as quite a surprise when I saw an e-mail message from my friend Chip Steitz up at Torii Station two days before Saturday’s Army-Navy flag football game that said, in effect, that Navy’s mascot has apparently defected to the other side!

Billy the Navy Goat has formally announced his official departure from the Navy and his concurrent enlistment in the Army. He will apparently be stationed at Torii, Steitz said in the e-mail statement.

Whether true or an eight-month-delayed version of the many April Fools’ stories that grace newspaper front pages from sea to shining sea wasn’t immediately known; attempts to reach Steitz by phone were unsuccessful.

Whatever. If Navy needed any more motivation to win its second straight game in Saturday’s next installment of the Commander’s Trophy series after losing six in a row, the following should provide plenty:

Sailors everywhere were shocked about this apparent betrayal from the beloved former Navy mascot.

“He was my only friend, I had no one else, why would he do this,” Petty Officer 3^rd Class I.M. Squidward said.

“Billy was the only one that would ever listen to me,” Ensign F.A. Flounder added.

Rumors about the apparent abandonment are rampant across all services from those that believe Billy left over a dispute about the Navy over uniforms. Others believe Billy just got tired of the service. However, some speculate that Billy just wanted to get back to his roots and join a service that actually spends time outdoors.

“I think Billy just wanted to do some hard-core field exercises on land,” Staff Sgt. D.J. Rock said.

The majority of soldiers and their family members think Billy left over the upcoming Army-Navy game in an apparent bid to be part of the winning team. Raider, Ranger, and Scotty, the current U.S. Army mascots are thrilled to have the new recruit, expressing interest in training the newcomer.

“He’ll have to pay his dues, but were excited to have him,” said Army mascot Raider, the Mule.

Billy’s first assignment will be at 10 a.m. Saturday at Torii Field during the Army-Navy game where he will cheer on his new service, wearing his new uniform.

Kickoff is at 1 p.m. Expect the usual full slate of pomp and pageantry, military band music, plus Samy Fineman of MCCS Okinawa TV’s Samy on the Street and former AFN DJ Samy fame, in the booth.

While all that’s going on, Navy also visits Army in the 10^th anniversary of their Japan showdown, only this time, featuring sailors from Naval Air Facility Atsugi instead of Yokosuka Naval Base. Kickoff is at 1 p.m. there as well. No word if any similar pre-game shenanigans have taken place. *smile*

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