Following the release of the July suicide figures, Army Vice Chief of Staff, Gen. Lloyd J. Austin III declared an Army wide Suicide Stand Down for September 27, 2012. The worldwide suicide prevention stand down will focus on promoting good health, teammate involvement, risk reduction and resilience training.
Our guest blog post is from today is from Jason Kelly, who was medically retired in March 2009 for major depressive disorder and anxiety, which he developed while serving on active duty. He works for the Fort Meade Public Affairs Office as its emerging media manager and oversees Fort Meade’s website and social media platform.
Check out his post below and let it serve as a reminder that it is a source of strength to ask for help.
“How are you feeling?”
Jason Kelly
I believe it is a question that probably saved my life. I thought the answer seemed obvious as I sat in my doctor’s office at Reynolds Army Community Hospital at Fort Sill, Okla., but I was wrong. I arrived at Fort Sill in April 2008 for Basic Officer Leadership Course II as a newly commissioned second lieutenant from Youngstown State University in Youngstown, Ohio.
I was excited about what I had accomplished as a college student. I was looking forward to the challenges that I would face as an armor officer. Training progressed as expected, but I was carrying around more than just my rucksack and M-4. I began to experience both relationship and family problems. I tried to resolve them myself when I wasn’t training.
The issues eventually took a toll on me and ate away at me. You could call it the perfect storm. I spent less free time with my friends there. I slept whenever I had an opportunity. I figured I just wasn’t feeling well; I hadn’t connected the dots yet.
I went to sick call where the doctors returned me to duty.
So, I continued training. At the same time, I felt like I was getting worse; I still felt uncomfortable. I cried whenever I secluded myself in my room. I tried to “man up” until one day when I was in the field. My chest tightened. I was short of breath. I felt out of control.
I blamed it on the stress of training under the hot Oklahoma sun. I kept it to myself – like I had been doing with my personal problems. When my platoon returned to the forward operating base, I finally said something, “I thought I was having a heart attack.”
I returned to the hospital where I was diagnosed with a panic attack. Later, I followed-up with my doctor. That’s when he asked me the question, “How are you feeling.”
Read Jason’s entire story on Ft. Meade’s Official Blog.
To learn more about the Army wide Suicide Stand Down, check out audio from a recent bloggers/media roundtable with Sgt. Maj. of the Army, Raymond F. Chandler: http://www.dvidshub.net/audio/31031/us-army-bloggers-roundtable-september#.UGQ8LpjA_9s
