Let's get something straight. If fiddling with your phone while a plane is taking off had any real chance of interfering with crucial avionics, we'd be screwed. Any ne'er-do-well need not fire a rocket-propelled grenade at a plane as it lifted skywards, they could simply loiter near the runway playing Angry Birds in the direction of their target.
Yet every time we are told to put our seats back and tray tables in an upright position, flight attendants insist that our personal gadgets are put away, for our own safety.
When Alec Baldwin was told to turn off his phone on an American Airlines flight preparing to depart LAX on Tuesday, he decided to put up a fight. Had he been familiar with the digital intermingling of gyro-stabilised magnetic compass systems and communications transceivers, or swotted up on industrial shifts from non-directional beacon navigation to the VHF omnidirectional range, he could have mounted a strong argument.
Instead, he threw a hissy fit, allegedly slamming a bathroom door loud enough for the pilot to hear. Pilots don't like loud bangs, and Baldwin was turfed out.
Here's the science bit. Back in the day, when air travel was a romantic, sepia world of panama hats and arched eyebrows, plane navigation systems were often made "unshielded" from surges of external interference. Technically, this means that if you are flying in a 1980s-built aircraft (the ashtrays in the loos are the giveaway), it is just about feasible that the cumulative signals of a squadron of iPhones could meddle with transmissions.
Yet in 2000, during a congressional hearing into the matter, evidence was presented that showed no obvious connection between personal electronic devices (PEDs) and dodgy navigational readings. The hearing, however, was not presented with any concrete proof that PEDs were incapable of breaching the systems. In short, they couldn't prove that phones borked plane systems, but they also couldn't prove that they didn't, so they opted for a better-safe-than-sorry approach and all went home.
Either way, it's fairly unlikely that Baldwin's plane was a dinosaur. Modern aircraft are made with shielded systems built to protect them from even the most dastardly of electromagnetic radiation, including lightning strikes. The only way your phone could breach it would be if you attached it to a brick and fired it at the cockpit from a cannon. Which I wouldn't advise.
So why, then, is this hand-held crackdown still ingrained in the pre-flight drill? Some have argued that it forces passengers into using the in-flight phones attached to your seat, allowing you to call your loved ones for the price of a Fabergé egg.
A less cynical explanation is that it's the flight attendants' way of ensuring your attention as they run through the various apocalyptic scenarios that could ensue before you land at the other end. And they've got a point. You'd be pretty peeved if, upon crash-landing in the mid-Atlantic, you couldn't work out to inflate your life jacket because you were engaged in the tail-end of a furious online word game as the plane was ferrying for take-off.
Personally, I like the pre-flight digital amnesty. As a travel wonk, I take great pleasure in watching the airport staff scuttle around the plane before take-off, lobbing bags on to travelators like shot putts and waving flags at each other. It's a moment to take stock, and consider the absurdness of what's about to happen. I'd rather briefly meditate on the fact that the oversized bus I'm sitting in is about to career into the sky than check my emails, or watch a YouTube video of a man being hit in the balls with a football.
I'm sure that the ban on personal gizmos is little more than a merry dance, underscoring the power balance between those lined up in rows and those in uniform, but that's fine by me. Baldwin, get over it.
Comments
7 December 2011 3:37PM
You forgot to mention that Baldwin is also a world-class douchebag, not above calling his own daughter a 'pig'.
7 December 2011 3:37PM
If you loved Jack Donaghy like you SHOULD, you'd never speak to him like this.
7 December 2011 3:38PM
Just like using your phone at a petrol station - it doesnt really matter. What matters is that it is a rule of travelling - a rule that 99 percent of people understand and deal with. He broke the rules so therefore had to leave.
Perhaps also they want phones off as it pisses off people when they listen to some berk blabbering on their phone.
7 December 2011 3:39PM
He was also very pleased with himself for having a little tantrum - What an arrogant self-absorbed twit.
7 December 2011 3:39PM
I think Alec Baldwin should have asked himself the following question:
What would Stephen Fry do?
7 December 2011 3:39PM
Let's not forget that Baldwin was the one who called his own daughter some rather unsavoury things.
A real class act.
7 December 2011 3:41PM
The next time he flies he should just pretend he's playing the role of an adult.
7 December 2011 3:43PM
Maybe he was trying to get the child's discount?
7 December 2011 3:43PM
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7 December 2011 3:45PM
niknaksdagger
Just to say I agree with your sentiments 100 %.
And seats on planes are still pretty tight together -
it would be far worse than listening to yabberers on trains
7 December 2011 3:45PM
Never seen them phones before. Because Ryanair haven't got them. But given their recent encouragement on in-flight wanking, sure they'll soon be installed, rigged up to 0898 numbers.
7 December 2011 3:46PM
He really is one of the biggest dicks in America, and that's no small accomplishment.
7 December 2011 3:48PM
Oh Alec, If only we all had enough money to show our complete devotion to words with friends.
7 December 2011 3:48PM
You are worthress, Arec Barrwin! ... When you see Arec Barrwin, you see the true ugriness of human nature.
And I'm not ronery one who thinks that.
7 December 2011 3:49PM
Pagey
I can't speak for all parents, but I'm pretty sure lots of kids have been called variations of 'rude little pigs' in moments of frustration. Baldwin and his daughter are by all accounts, very close now.
Anyway, back to the article, if it really has become one of those rules that isn't neccessary, why is it maintained? And can't you now use 'airplane mode' to keep your phone on during flights?
7 December 2011 3:50PM
I recently flew to the Isle of Man on a plane from a company that I shall refer to as eggbox airlines.'
The beauty of these aircraft is that you get an aisle seat and a window seat, all at the same time.
They are a Turbo-Prop STOL aircraft. No fancy jets here.
They don't go above 10,000 feet and the principle method of navigation seems to involve looking out of the window and following the M6, hanging a left at Anglesey and then pointing straight at the big rock in the Irish Sea.
Given the above, I was suprised to be asked to turn my phone off.
The madness is everywhere.
7 December 2011 3:52PM
Why are we still banned from liquids above 100 ml but allowed as many bottles below 100 ml as you want, and you can take an empty bottle on board!
Even eggbox airlines specifically asked that we didn't do this.
7 December 2011 3:53PM
That may be so, but he's also seriously fucking funny, and great in 30 Rock.
And as Isabella says, I'm pretty certain he's not the first parent to call his child an unpleasant name. Probably the first celebrity parent to be recorded doing so tho...
7 December 2011 3:54PM
he is a left leaning liberal showbiz lovvy, so his behavior doesn't surprise me at all ,they are use to having a fuss made of them and love being the center of attention and also think for some reason that they are the voice of the people.
he is not the worse one, though hugh grant probably is
7 December 2011 3:54PM
Because some planes dont have the flux capacitor super stealth mode switch which is a sort of gellar field which keeps all electro magnetic morse code static out of the radio comms.
Failing that it's a safety thing I assume, listen and pay attention etc... Also how fucked off would you be listening to a 100 chats in basically an air trapped fart holder
7 December 2011 3:54PM
Ms Mackie, can you please stop trying to subvert this thread and make everyone focus on the crux of the issue: industrial shifts from non-directional beacon navigation to the VHF omnidirectional range.
Thanks.
7 December 2011 3:55PM
On 2nd thought, a robust defense of Baldwin:
"Well, he's not as big a dick as Senator Chuck Schumer, who prefers smirk and smarm over a little righteous anger when he abuses flight attendants.
7 December 2011 3:55PM
Maybe his daughter is a pig?
Perhaps the author has referenced Angry Birds as the aim is to destroy the pigs?
We may never know.
7 December 2011 3:56PM
If your phone is an iPhone or other smart phone.. Yes.
Not ordinary phones though.. They don't do modes.
7 December 2011 3:57PM
Whether you agree with it or not it's a rule that everybody has to adhere to.
By throwing a hissy fit he's basically indicating that he thinks he's better than everyone else.
I have zero sympathy for the arrogant prick.
7 December 2011 3:59PM
I was fully in support of South Park's decision to bomb the Baldwins.
But if there was a time in the history of the world where obedience was called for, this sure as hell isn't it.
7 December 2011 4:01PM
Anyways... Air travel is ostensibly boring as fuck.. So I'd really like to be able to surf the net n stuff, play games, watch music vids (with headphones), to keep me happy. But I so agree that people shouldn't be allowed to make calls. Too too irritating.
7 December 2011 4:01PM
I kept my phone on when I went to Portugal with some bucket-shop airline or other a couple of years ago because I wanted to use the (surprisingly good) camera on the back to take pictures of the coastlines.
Guess what? The plane didn't crash.
It's bullshit.
7 December 2011 4:01PM
You are playing snake right now, arent you?
7 December 2011 4:01PM
His political leanings are irrelevant to his behaviour.
7 December 2011 4:03PM
I think it needs to be pointed out that in the aftermath of the incident Alec Baldwin tweeted that he would not be flying with American Airlines again.
http://m.ctv.ca/topstories/20111207/alec-baldwin-kick-off-plane-111207.html
Perhaps American Airlines could turn that into a selling point.
Fly with us and you'll never have to fly with Alec Baldwin
7 December 2011 4:07PM
It is a simple rule if people cannot obey it then they should not be allowed to fly. You have to have your seat belt during taking off and landing, it won't have any effect on the plane yet it is still a rule that must be followed.
7 December 2011 4:09PM
I assume it's engineering best practice. Here is my best guess: When conducting a risk analysis on an aircraft design, one possible adverse event is that passenger electronics interfere with navigation equipment, which could lead to a plane crash killing all passengers on board. Even though the probability of this happening is extremely low, the consequences are so great that the aircraft designer must verify that the navigation equipment will still function in the presence of PEDs. It is impossible to anticipate what type of PEDs passengers will bring on board, or what types of PEDs will exist in the future, so verifying the functionality of the navigation equipment around every type of PED is impossible. In order to meet government aviation regulations, and guarantee safety, restricting PED use is probably the only option available.
7 December 2011 4:10PM
By my calculations, the laws of physics actually prove that planes cannot fly anyway. That's why I never get on a plane.
7 December 2011 4:12PM
not so sure ?,probably his political leanings are the cause of his behavior.
we don't seem to have any right leaning lovvies wanting to be the voice of the people ,i can only think of clarkson, but not even he thinks that he can do what he wants on a plane
7 December 2011 4:13PM
Great article! Alec's twitter account is "deactivated", co-incidence?
I remember a few years back being on an ancient 757 flight back from the US - plane was from the 1980's. I was more worried about the in-flight entertainment system they'd shoe-horned into it, like trying to run multiple digital TV's through your cig lighter socket in a Morris Ital . Plane was delayed for over an hour as they had to re-boot it several times, nothing like watching the Linux boot-up sequence on your little screen to fill you with confidence.......
7 December 2011 4:15PM
No. I have an iPhone.. I use it to secretly twit from work since one of the baggages grassed me up and they firewalled twitter on the puters.. Ggggrr
7 December 2011 4:18PM
They need one, because they're only marginally better than Ryanair (at least for short haul domestic in the US)
7 December 2011 4:19PM
Maybe he was commenting on the recent news that American Airlines has filed for bankruptcy protection?
7 December 2011 4:20PM
Kyza06
Yes - he is seriously funny. Other Baldwins not so much.
GoogleWhack
But why must we follow rules that make no sense? We are all individuals!*
*I'm not.
Sorry Benji, I am hijacking your thread a bit.
7 December 2011 4:21PM
Er.....riiiight.
7 December 2011 4:22PM
So you're going to travel by Bee instead?
7 December 2011 4:23PM
Why dont the airlines just do a frequency block on the phones, that would solve the problem and there would be no one to break the rules.
7 December 2011 4:25PM
I'm in the business. We did some FAA certification test flights on a typical in-service 737-800 (and this was 11 years ago), and every engineer on board was yammering away on their phones, right through departure, cruise, approach, landing, and rollout. No effect whatsoever. This is just another in a long list of examples of how airplane travel has been turned into an exercise of petty tyranny.
7 December 2011 4:27PM
Yeah, but seriously, come on guys, gyro-stabilised magnetic compass systems, eh?
Those things are WILD!
Anyone?
7 December 2011 4:28PM
I don't think so. It seems like a strop as he also tweeted "#theresalwaysunited".
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2011/12/alec-baldwin-got-a-little-angry-on-plane-oscar-de-la-hoya-says.html
7 December 2011 4:31PM
That is SO old school.
7 December 2011 4:31PM
Plane on a conveyor belt accelerated to a speed that can achieve lift.
Plane takes off?
7 December 2011 4:34PM
What's with the internecine inter-thread warfare going on at the Guardian Towers? Never witnessed this before.
A slow news day? Or are thread lengths now used as a KPI for journalists' bonuses?
7 December 2011 4:35PM
Unless it's a private jet, I ain't gettin on no plane. I mean, they scrunch you up next to OTHER PEOPLE an' stuff.