Funny Horoscopes

Remember, if you are on the cusp of another sign you most likely will have features of both signs...which may lead you into total confusion...... AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Optimis...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 102

23 Lines to Make You Smile

TWENTY THREE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE 1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't. 2.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them. ...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 129

Female Comebacks

Female Comebacks! Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Your pla...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 3,269

RAZOR Trouble Shooting

Problem Vehicle does not run Possible Cause Undercharged battery Solution Charge the battery. A new battery should have been charged for at least 12 hours before using the vehicle for the first t...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 716

Animal Jokes

Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary: 8:00 am: 9:30 am: 9:40 am: 10:30 am: 12:00 pm: 1:00 pm: 3:00 pm: 5:00 pm: 7:00 pm: 8:00 pm: 11:00 pm: Dog food! My favorite thing! A car ride! My favorite thing! ...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 507

Men and Women Jokes

How to shower like a Woman: 1. Take off the fourteen layers of clothing you put on this morning. 2. Walk to the bathroom wearing your robe and with a towel on your head. If you happen to see your h...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 1,329

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

9 Things I Hate About Everyone 1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the t...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 563

Celebrity One Liners

ONE LINERS The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life. Carlin -George Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can b...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 891

Jay Leno Wrote This

Jay Leno wrote this; it's the Jay Leno we don't often see.... 'The other day I was reading Newsweek magazine and came across some poll data I found rather hard to believe. It must be true, given th...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 232

New Words for 2007

Thought you just might recognize a few of these in the workplace...... NEW WORDS FOR 2007: Essential vocabulary additions for the workplace (and elsewhere)!!! 1. BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a ...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 324

Men Jokes

BECAUSE I’M A GUY… I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at the store, like milk, or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like "Cumin" or "Tofu." For all I know these are...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 918

Bathroom Etiquette

This one's hilarious. 1999 Survival Guide for Taking a Dump at Work. Memorize these definitions and pooping at work will become a pure pleasure. ESCAPEE: A fart that slips out while taking a leak a...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 1,946

Interesting Facts

VERY INTERESTING STUFF In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the rule of thumb' Many years ago ...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 497

You Know You Are a Queen When...

Subject: Are you a queen? 1. If you regularly use the phrase "window treatment," then, Miss Thing, you're a Queen. 2. If your kitchen drawer contains a shrimp deveiner, a mushroom brush, or a lemo...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 328

Age Jokes

Signs That You Are No Longer a Kid You're asleep, but others worry that you're dead. Your back goes out more than you do. You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room....

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 895

Only in America

Only in America....do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. Only in Only in America......

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 374

Employment Jokes

Differences Between You and Your Boss When you take a long time, you're slow. When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough. When you don't do it, you're lazy. When your boss doesn't do it, he's ...

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 1,064

DFUS

From: SFKittyKat

Reads: 284