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There's nothing like the deeply comforting sound of my son banging his head into the kitchen window over and over and over again. 6:59 AM Dec 5th from web |
My best idea of the day: Commission your artsy teen to do a family portrait, in any style they desire. That's what I just did. 5:53 AM Dec 5th from web |
Too many people in Starbucks. Can't they see I'm trying to WRITE?! 9:24 AM Dec 3rd from web |
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Just drove past a packed Loveless Cafe. I can't believe people are still stuffing their faces. I feel like a float in the Macy's Parade. 10:31 AM Nov 29th from web |
Cleaned every room in the house yesterday except my bathroom because who's going in MY BATHROOM? Turns out.... EVERYBODY. *sigh* 9:29 AM Nov 27th from web |
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It is now time to resort to Thanksgiving Cleaning Plan B: Distract parents the moment they arrive and steal their eyeglasses. 8:12 AM Nov 26th from web |
Attention Tire Barn. Thanksgiving is TOMORROW. You are not allowed to be closed TODAY. People have nails in their tires and sh#t. Turkeys. 7:11 AM Nov 26th from web |
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I think I'll be supremely annoying today and call everyone I speak with today, "Turkey!" 6:11 AM Nov 26th from web |
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Everyone, you can stop DM'ing me with your concerns and well wishes. @guykawasaki and I have ended our follow feud. We Tweeted it out. 5:38 AM Nov 26th from web |
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It was a dark day when @guykawasaki unfollowed me. I guess he finally found that picture I posted of me sitting on his toilet. 9:30 PM Nov 25th from web |
Having guest bathroom painted, the day before my parents arrive. Bought paint late last night. Now THAT'S procrastination!! 11:24 AM Nov 25th from web |
Thanksgiving week gives me the same feeling that exam week gave me in high school... 5:19 PM Nov 24th from web |
Just read "I Know an Old Lady Who Swallowed a Pie"- Punky was horrified. "Why didn't she just say no thank you?!" she asked at the end. 6:05 PM Nov 23rd from web |