Planning an event is like pulling teeth for me, in the sense that the teeth in question are mine. 5:53 AM Dec 9th from web |
Neighbours are fighting outside at 7 am. This is much too early in the day to fight. Maybe they're carrying over from the night before? 5:23 AM Dec 9th from web |
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Zombieform bras! Quality undeadwear for the organically unresolved. 9:04 AM Nov 28th from web |
My boss is trying to talk to me. She doesn't know that my office door is closed. 8:53 AM Nov 28th from web |
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Fellow AmeriTweeps: why do they call it Black Friday? That sounds like market collapse or terrorist attack, not great sales. 6:47 AM Nov 28th from web |
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I watched the trailer for The Wrestler. Mickey Rourke has become so ugly it's kind of inspiring. 6:41 AM Nov 28th from web |
Rick Astley rickrolls himself whenever he glances into a mirror. It must be driving him crazy by now. 12:46 PM Nov 27th from web |
Told a coworker from Korea that I was "in a pickle". She said: "In a pickle? Are you ... sour?" Then I remembered that English is stupid. 7:47 AM Nov 27th from web |
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Today I will invent the Hotdamnotronic Chamber out of spare parts and a garbage can. Guaranteed to ease your chi and float your flagella. 10:38 AM Nov 23rd from web |