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So many people have asked 'Gary, why would you wear such a thing to court?' Honestly, I thought the redneck I hit would be drunk and naked. 2 days ago from web |
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Despite rumor, I have never spent the night with Michael Jackson in the 80's. It was 1997, and I was homeless. 6 days ago from web |
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@god I must confess my sins and say I've not spoken to Shavar Ross since his 'Cousin Oliver' antics got us canceled. Sucka owes me $12. 8 days ago from web in reply to god |
Always bring Gary to Black Friday sales. I swoop beneath legs and over shoulders like a dwarf Chuck Norris. 9 days ago from TwitterFox |
Everyone at my house sits at the kiddie table. 10 days ago from web |
Every year, I hide in the roaster to scare whoever is making the turkey. Shannon likes to preheat. Tradition canceled. 10 days ago from web |
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