11 April 2008
A Life-Changing Experience
How one Azerbaijani exchange student’s experiences affected his life
By Fariz Ismailzade
Important life lessons can be learned from the simplest tasks. So reflects Azerbaijani Fariz Ismailzade on his experiences as an exchange student in the United States.
Fariz was in the United States as an exchange student both in high school and college. He returned to Azerbaijan to graduate from the Western University in Baku and work as ademocracy activist. Fariz now serves Azerbaijan's Foreign Ministry as the director of training programs at the diplomatic academy. He also heads the Azerbaijani Alumni Association, comprising fellow U.S.-educated Azerbaijanis.
In 1995, I was 16 years old when I was accepted to the high school exchange program, called the Future Leaders Exchange, sponsored by the U.S. State Department. I remember having lots of stereotypes about Americans and life in the United States at that time. Coming from a rural Azerbaijan town of Lankaran, in the south of the country, only four years after my country began to open up to the rest of the world, I had a limited worldview.
Both my parents and I were worried about my year-long stay in my American host family. Despite these concerns, I was still excited and thrilled about this opportunity.
That day at the airport, as my journey was about to begin, I thought a new world is opening for me. I was dressed in new, American style T-shirt and jeans and wore my new sneakers shoes. I was already trying to copy American peers. Forty-five other Azerbaijani youth in the same exchange program were flying with me. We kept talking about our host states, trying to impress each other with our host families' distinct quality. One guy said that his host father was a banker. Everyone said, "Wow." The other said that his host family lived in Hawaii. Wow. I had not much to boast about, as my host family lived in rural Oregon and I had no clue what this state is like.
When I arrived in Oregon, my host family greeted me at the airport with a sign written in Azerbaijani language. I asked my host father where he got that sign, and he said "Internet." It was my first introduction to the power of Internet. Little I knew then that the rest of my life will depend so much on this wonderful invention.
Then we drove home and on the way decided to stop at the McDonalds and buy milkshake. My host brothers immediately started fighting for a bigger piece. For me, it was the start of stereotype-breaking process. I started realizing that Americans are just like us Azerbaijanis — normal people with everyday desires, problems, habits, and behavior styles.
On my first full day in this new and strange place, I learned to wash dishes. My host mother asked me to be in charge of house chores twice per week, just like my two host brothers. In Azerbaijan only females wash dishes, and for me this task was a bit humiliating. I have never done it in my life. But my host mother made it clear that she will make no difference between her "three sons." The fact that she included me in that list made me very proud, and, in fact, I wanted to excel in this chore. Later, my host mother and I bonded through kitchen chores and often spent time talking about my country while cutting greens for the evening salad.
The next week I learned to wash my clothes in the washing machine and put them in the dryer. Then I learned to do shopping at the big supermarket, write letters and take them to the post office, plan my monthly budget, organize my schedule, sign up for classes … the list goes on. As a result, I became self-reliant, independent, mature, and organized person. In a traditional society like the one in Azerbaijan, kids rarely learn these skills and continue to be dependent on their parents till middle ages.
My self-reliant character and this set of skills helps me still these days. Ever since I have come back, I have never taken a single penny from my parents and have been able to go through both college and graduate school on my own.
While in the United States, I have also learned what it takes to be a civic activist. In Azerbaijan, where everything traditionally depends on a government, citizens and youth rarely see opportunities for making changes in their communities. In Oregon, I saw how students planned projects, fundraised, organized sport events, helped the community, scheduled class trips, and brainstormed together for new ideas. I became part of the fundraising team for the class trip, and the members welcomed me and showed me ways to get engaged. It was a great sense of responsibility on a young Azerbaijani, but it was also fun. Washing cars, selling snacks during sport games, designing the high school newsletter, taking photos, making interviews, planning the trip … these tasks shaped me much and gave me the skills of creativity, responsibility, and teamwork.
Since I have come back, this civic activism has been an inseparable part of my life, be it the editor of the college newsletter, organizer of discussion clubs, working as a democracy promoter, freelance journalist, and founder of the largest and most successful alumni association in Azerbaijan [www.aaa.org.az].
My second exchange trip to the United States made me better aware of the U.S. political system and the ways to get involved in it. I was attending Wesleyan University in Connecticut, and its close proximity to Washington and New York made me interested in local and international politics. I remember my first letter to President Clinton and Secretary of State Madeleine Albright to support the oil pipeline project in my country. I wrote a Connecticut member of the House of Representatives in Washington to urge him to support the peace process between Azerbaijan and Armenia. I remember how excited I was when Congressman Sam Gejdenson wrote me back.
At the end of my college exchange year, I decided to do an internship in Washington, D.C., the nest for political activity, debates, lobbyists, and politicians. My internship at the Center for Strategic and International Studies taught me smarter and more pragmatic ways to argue a case in front of the political establishment of the United States.
The lessons learned during that year help me even today. In early 2007, I was offered a job at the Foreign Ministry of Azerbaijan to head the training programs for the newly recruited diplomats. The offer came as a result of the relationship I built during that internship in Washington with our embassy in the United States.
Today, I work to shape and improve the modern, independent Azerbaijan with my grassroots work and educational projects. The lessons of the exchange years in the United States are with me still — there are always problems in life, and there are always solutions to these problems. Opportunities are limitless, and one should always be in search for new opportunities and new activism. Life is too short to waste.
The opinions expressed in this article do not necessarily reflect the views or policies of the U.S. government.
