Making a Difference: What It Means
Getting Involved: Things to Think About
"When I was diagnosed, it was a
frightening, lonely time. Everything
changed when I found others who were
fighting the same disease. Once I had
the information I needed and my
situation was under control, I decided to
help others."
Steve, myeloma survivor, 48
Cancer survivors and those who are close to them, as well as people who have
lost someone to cancer, know what it is like to live with cancer. Getting
involved in cancer-related activities is like a two-way street. When you help
others, you also help yourself. Here are some benefits of getting involved in
cancer-related activities:
-
You accept cancer as part of your life. When you get involved, cancer
can give a new meaning to your life. "Now that I am a cancer survivor, my life
will go on, but it has changed. I need to make my cancer experience mean
something," said one 42-year-old survivor.
-
You are less afraid of cancer. People often find that the more they know
about cancer, the less they fear it.
-
You may feel more spiritual. As one survivor said, "I am fulfilling a
promise that I made to God."
-
You feel that you are doing something useful with your cancer experience.
As one person said, "Getting involved is a powerful force in my life because I
am doing something to make the world better."
-
You have more confidence. People often feel better when they work with
others toward a common goal. As one survivor said, "I'm not a victim anymore."
-
You meet other people who share the same kind of experiences. "Only
another survivor can tell how it is and sympathize with a person and offer
support and advice," said a 36-year-old survivor.
-
You make a difference in other people's lives. People can feel good when
they make a difference in the lives of others.
-
You teach others about cancer. This includes talking with people about
what it means to have cancer as well helping someone through it. As a father
who lost a child to leukemia said, "It is not just about me and my daughter. It
is about all the moms and dads who have to go through this painful experience
with their kids. We know what it is like to be afraid, feel guilty, and not
know where to turn. I will keep on working for these kids and their parents to
make sure that their needs are met."
-
You find meaning in the face of a life-threatening illness. Research has
shown that cancer survivors often find new meaning in their lives when they get
involved. This can be an important part of the healing process. Research has
also shown that people who feel a part of their community enjoy better health
and feel a sense of purpose in their lives.
"My cancer treatment was years
ago. At first, I wanted nothing to
do with cancer. I wouldn't even
read a magazine that had an
article about cancer. Now, I am
ready, and I want to do
something with my cancer
experience."
Frieda, uterine cancer survivor, 72
People with cancer, as well as those who love and care about them, may want to
get involved in cancer-related activities. But it is important to ask, "Is this
the right time to get involved?"
The answer to this question will be different for each person, since everyone
has his or her own experience with cancer. As you decide if this is the right
time for you, think about how long you've been dealing with cancer, your
health, your feelings, and your comfort in talking about cancer.
Think About How Long You've Been Dealing with Cancer
If you are reading this document, you may be:
-
In treatment now, or recently finished with your cancer treatment. Some
people find that getting involved helps them think about things other than
cancer. Some even say that it makes their treatment seem easier. Other people
find that treatment keeps them too busy or leaves them too tired to get
involved.
-
Living with advanced cancer. Some people living with advanced cancer
feel that getting involved is a good way to care for the people they will leave
behind. They want to make a difference and help others right up to the end of
their lives. Think about how you feel, and decide if you have the health and
strength to get involved now.
-
At high risk for getting cancer. You may have a strong family history of
cancer and may be at risk for getting the disease yourself. This can be hard to
accept. Some people find that getting involved in cancer-related activities is
a way to help themselves as well as others.
-
A family member or friend of someone with cancer. You know what it is
like to care for someone who has cancer. Getting involved in volunteer
activities is a good way for some people to give and get the support they need,
but it can also be hard. Think about whether getting involved in cancer-related
activities is right for you.
-
Someone who has lost a family member or friend to cancer. You may still
be sad and grieving after someone you care about dies of cancer. Getting
involved can be a way for many people to do something positive with these
feelings.
Think About Your Health
Think about your own health needs before you decide to get involved. Decide if
you have enough energy or time to start a new project. Some people want to wait
until their health is better. Others choose an activity that is easy for them
now.
Think About Your Feelings
People often think about their own experience when they get involved in a
cancer-related activity. This is good for some people as it can help them deal
with their own feelings. This can also be hard. Sometimes people become upset
when they get involved in cancer-related activities.
Take some time to think about your feelings. If you are very worried, angry, or
depressed right now, you might want to talk with a counselor about your
feelings. Later, when you feel more positive, you can begin to think about ways
to help others.
Think About Your Comfort in Talking About
Cancer
You can still get involved in cancer-related activities, even if you do not
want to talk about your own experience. If this is how you feel, find
activities in which you do not have to share your personal feelings or
thoughts.
Think About What You Can Give
Many people are very busy and don't have a lot of time to give to cancer-related
activities, but there are still ways they can help others. For example, you can
donate money, books, or clothing that other people need for their cancer care.
Think About Where You Live
Some people, especially those who live in rural areas, find that there are no
cancer-related activities nearby. If this happens, you might have to think
about other ways to get involved. You can, for example, start a new activity or
travel to one that is far away. You might also want to get involved at a
distance by phone, mail, or over the Internet.
Think About What You Like to Do with Your Time
Everyone has an interest or skill that can help others. As you decide how to
get involved, think about your talents, interests, and lifestyle. This includes
your culture, religion, and even your hobbies. You may also want to think about
what you like and don't like, as well as subjects you want to learn more about.
|
What if "getting involved" is a constant reminder of how hard cancer is for me?
Getting involved in cancer-related activities can remind you of your own
experience. This can be good, as it may help you with your own issues while you
help others with theirs. Getting involved can also be hard. If you find you are
not ready right now, take the time you need to help yourself before you offer
to help others.
|
"Whenever somebody says to me, 'I could
never get up in front of thousands of people
and speak like you do,' I always say, 'You
don't have to.'"
Margaret, cervical cancer survivor, 42
Here are some examples of talents or skills that many people have used to make
a difference in cancer.
Skill or talent |
What you like to do |
Listening
|
Help people tell their stories and express their concerns. You also answer
questions without giving your opinion or passing judgment.
|
Support
|
Help others by offering to do errands, baby-sit, or drive them to appointments.
|
Enthusiasm
|
Motivate others and give them ideas about how to get things done.
|
Creativity
|
Come up with new ideas or use your talents, such as quilting, selling homemade
desserts, or developing a public relations campaign.
|
Learning and teaching
|
Learn new information and teach others what you know.
|
Communication
|
Write. You can get your ideas across by writing articles or speaking in public. |
Group work
|
Work with others and be part of a team that gets things done.
|
Office skills
|
Use the computer, talk on the phone, and organize records and files.
|
Organizational skills
|
Plan meetings, events, or group activities, (like organizing a phone call alert
list or "tree," planning a fundraiser, or starting a local support group).
|
Leadership skills
|
Take charge and get things done. Get people to work together on an activity.
|
Even if you're not sure about your skills or talents,
Finding Ways You Can Make a Difference: A Guide can help you match your
skills and experiences with cancer-related activities. Use the Guide to find
the types of activities that interest and inspire you.
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