Get a second or even third opinion. Seeking other
opinions means talking about prostate cancer treatment
with doctors you are not working with now. You may
want to talk with other prostate cancer specialists, such
as a urologist, urologic oncologist, surgeon, medical
oncologist, internist, or radiation oncologist.
Getting second and third opinions can be confusing,
because you may get different advice or opinions.
Because of this, many men find it helpful to see a
medical oncologist for a general view of prostate cancer
treatment options. Talking with other doctors can give
you ideas to think about or help you feel better about
the choice you are making.Most insurance companies
pay for second opinions. It is better to get a second
opinion than worry that you made the wrong choice.
"When you are faced with a medical decision
like this, you almost want to put yourself in the
hands of the expert. But it's really a decision
that you have to make, and you have to make it
on an informed basis and seek out more than
one opinion from a doctor."
- Paul
Many men with prostate cancer find that it helps to learn
a lot about their disease and its treatment. Doing so can
help you feel more in control and at ease with your
treatment choice.
You can learn more by reading books and articles, searching
the Internet, or calling organizations that focus on prostate
cancer. But too much information can sometimes be
overwhelming or confusing as you are adjusting to your
diagnosis. Instead, learn as much as you want to know at a
time when you are ready. Later, you can always find out
more. Let your doctor or nurse know what else you need to
know to be comfortable reaching a decision.
Some men want to read books and articles that outline the
current research on prostate cancer treatment options.
Others prefer to meet with men at support groups who
have had prostate cancer to learn how they made their
treatment choices. Some men may not want information or
want to talk about it at first - only later are they ready for
more information. All of these approaches are natural
reactions to coping with a diagnosis of prostate cancer.
For more details, see the fact sheet "How to Evaluate Health
Information on the Internet: Questions and Answers" at
www.cancer.gov, search term "Internet." Also see Resources for more information.
It's natural to feel many emotions at this time. Sometimes
you may have many strong feelings at once, while at other
times, you may feel overwhelmed or angry. Your spouse or
partner will also feel a range of emotions but may not have
the same emotions at the same time as you do.
A diagnosis of prostate cancer can stir up many feelings,
such as fear of the cancer getting worse or of dying. You
may also worry about changes to your body or being
intimate with your spouse or partner.Many men describe a
feeling of loss - loss of the life they had before cancer, loss
of energy levels, or the physical loss of the prostate. These
feelings are a natural part of the coping process.
Your spouse or partner may be worried about losing you,
changes to your lives, and how to best give you the support
you need. They may want to talk about it more than you
want to at first. If you find that you need time to adjust and
sort out your feelings and values, let your spouse or partner
and family know your needs. Chances are that they are also
trying to cope with the news and may not know how best
to help you. If you are holding your worries and feelings
inside for too long and your silence is hurting you or your
family, ask your doctor, counselor, or religious leader for
suggestions about getting help.
Reaching a decision on how you want to treat your prostate
cancer is very personal - it is a blending of what is
important to you, what you value the most, what types of
treatment options are available to you, and what the
benefits and side effects are.
Along with talking to their health professionals and spouse
or partner, many men find it helpful to meet with others
and talk about treatment choices. For example, you might
want to meet with:
- Family. This includes your relatives and close friends
who care about you. Your family can support your
choice about treatment.
- Men who faced prostate cancer. There is a lot to learn
from other men who faced these same prostate cancer
treatment decisions. You may want to join a support
group or meet with others to talk about the choices
they made and what life is like now that treatment is
over. Remember that while your prostate cancer may be
similar to someone else's, your life and desires may be
very different.
- Others who can help you. You may have other people
in your life who can help. This may be a close friend,
neighbor, counselor, social worker, or religious leader
you like and trust.
You may find it helpful to ask the following questions:
Could you write down my exact type of prostate cancer?
May I have a copy of my pathology report?
If I wish to have another pathologist look at my prostate
biopsy, how do I get the slides?
What is the clinical stage and Gleason score of this cancer?
What treatment option do you recommend?
- Watchful waiting
- Surgery (What type, can the nerves be spared, and how
often do you do this procedure?)
- Radiation (What type do you use, and what can be
done to minimize side effects?)
- Other
What are the short- and long-term side effects of this
particular treatment?
What are my chances of:
- Becoming incontinent
- Becoming impotent
- Having other urine or bowel problems
What are the chances of the cancer coming back if I have
this treatment?
What is the expected survival rate?
"Prostate cancer gives you the opportunity to make
a deliberate, considered choice. In the majority of
cases, the disease is very slow growing and is never
a medical emergency.
With prostate cancer, you have ample time to
assess the situation, evaluate your particular
needs and resources, and devise the most sensible,
strategic plan of action.
Doctors can and should help you to understand
your medical situation, but only you can decide
what trade-offs you can tolerate, what level of risk
you find acceptable, and which potential sacrifices
you're willing to make."
- Dr. Peter Scardino,
Chairman of the Department of Urology, Memorial
Sloan Kettering Cancer Center
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