At least 10% of men in our country have suffered from trauma as
a result of sexual assault. Like women, men who experience sexual
assault may suffer from depression, PTSD, and other emotional
problems as a result. However, because men and women have different
life experiences due to their different gender roles, emotional
symptoms following trauma can look different in men than they do in
women.
Who are the perpetrators of male sexual assault?
Those who sexually assault men or boys differ in a number of
ways from those who assault only females.
Boys are more likely than girls to be sexually abused by
strangers or by authority figures in organizations such as schools,
the church, or athletics programs.
Those who sexually assault males usually choose young men and
male adolescents (the average age is 17 years old) as their victims
and are more likely to assault many victims, compared to those who
sexually assault females.
Perpetrators often assault young males in isolated areas where
help is not readily available. For instance, a perpetrator who
assaults males may pick up a teenage hitchhiker on a remote road or
find some other way to isolate his intended victim.
As is true about those who assault and sexually abuse women and
girls, most perpetrators of males are men. Specifically, men are
perpetrators in about 86% of male victimization cases.
Despite popular belief that only gay men would sexually assault
men or boys, most male perpetrators identify themselves as
heterosexuals and often have consensual sexual relationships with
women.
What are some symptoms related to sexual trauma in boys and
men?
Particularly when the assailant is a woman, the impact of sexual
assault upon men may be downplayed by professionals and the public.
However, men who have early sexual experiences with adults report
problems in various areas at a much higher rate than those who do
not.
Emotional Disorders
Men and boys who have been
sexually assaulted are more likely to suffer from PTSD, other
anxiety disorders, and depression than those who have never been
abused sexually.
Substance Abuse
Men who have been sexually assaulted
have a high incidence of alcohol and drug use. For example, the
probability for alcohol problems in adulthood is about 80% for men
who have experienced sexual abuse, as compared to 11% for men who
have never been sexually abused.
Encopresis
One study revealed that a percentage of
boys who suffer from encopresis (bowel incontinence) had been
sexually abused.
Risk Taking Behavior
Exposure to sexual trauma can
lead to risk-taking behavior during adolescence, such as running
away and other delinquent behaviors. Having been sexually assaulted
also makes boys more likely to engage in behaviors that put them at
risk for contracting HIV (such as having sex without using
condoms).
How does male gender socialization affect the recognition of
male sexual assault?
Men who have not dealt with the symptoms of their sexual
assault may experience confusion about their sexuality and role
as men (their gender role). This confusion occurs for many
reasons. The traditional gender role for men in our society
dictates that males be strong, self-reliant, and in control. Our
society often does not recognize that men and boys can also be
victims. Boys and men may be taught that being victimized implies
that they are weak and, thus, not a man.
Furthermore, when the perpetrator of a sexual assault is a
man, feelings of shame, stigmatization, and negative reactions
from others may also result from the social taboos.
When the perpetrator of a sexual assault is a woman, some
people do not take the assault seriously, and men may feel as
though they are unheard and unrecognized as victims.
Parents often know very little about male sexual assault and
may harm their male children who are sexually abused by
downplaying or denying the experience.
What impact does gender socialization have upon men who have
been sexually assaulted?
Because of their experience of sexual assault, some men attempt
to prove their masculinity by becoming hyper-masculine. For
example, some men deal with their experience of sexual assault by
having multiple female sexual partners or engaging in dangerous
"macho" behaviors to prove their masculinity. Parents of boys who
have been sexually abused may inadvertently encourage this
process.
Men who acknowledge their assault may have to struggle with
feeling ignored and invalidated by others who do not recognize that
men can also be victimized.
Because of ignorance and myths about sexual abuse, men sometimes
fear that the sexual assault by another man will cause them to
become gay. This belief is false. Sexual assault does not cause
someone to have a particular sexual orientation.
Because of these various gender-related issues, men are more
likely than women to feel ashamed of the assault, to not talk about
it, and to not seek help from professionals.
Are men who were sexually assaulted as children more likely to
become child molesters?
Another myth that male victims of sexual assault face is the
assumption that they will become abusers themselves. For instance,
they may have heard that survivors of sexual abuse tend to repeat
the cycle of abuse by abusing children themselves. Some research
has shown that men who were sexually abused by men during their
childhood have a greater number of sexual thoughts and fantasies
about sexual contact with male children and adolescents. However,
it is important to know that
most male victims of child sexual abuse
do
not become sex offenders.
Furthermore, many male perpetrators do not have a history of
child sexual abuse. Rather, sexual offenders more often grew up in
families where they suffered from several other forms of abuse,
such as physical and emotional. Men who assault others also have
difficulty with empathy, and thus put their own needs above the
needs of their victims.
Is there help for men who have been sexually assaulted?
It is important for men who have been sexually assaulted to
understand the connection between sexual assault and
hyper-masculine, aggressive, and self-destructive behavior. Through
therapy, men often learn to resist myths about what a "real man" is
and adopt a more realistic model for safe and rewarding living.
It is important for men who have been sexually assaulted and who
are confused about their sexual orientation to confront misleading
societal ideas about sexual assault and homosexuality.
Men who have been assaulted often feel stigmatized, which can be
the most damaging aspect of the assault. It is important for men to
discuss the assault with a caring and unbiased support person,
whether that person is a friend, clergyman, or clinician. However,
it is vital that this person be knowledgeable about sexual assault
and men.
A local rape crisis center may be able to refer men to
mental-health practitioners who are well-informed about the needs
of male sexual assault victims.
Summary
There is a bias in our culture against viewing the sexual
assault of boys and men as prevalent and abusive. Because of this
bias, there is a belief that boys and men do not experience abuse
and do not suffer from the same negative impact that girls and
women do. However, research shows that at least 10% of boys and men
are sexually assaulted and that boys and men can suffer profoundly
from the experience. Because so few people have information about
male sexual assault, men often suffer from a sense of being
different, which can make it more difficult for men to seek help.
If you are a man who has been assaulted and you suffer from any
of these difficulties, please seek help from a mental-health
professional who has expertise working with men who have been
sexually assaulted.
Recommended Books
Victims No Longer: Men Recovering from Incest and Other Sexual
Child Abuse by Mike Lew, Foreword by Ellen Bass. (1990).
HarperCollins; ISBN 0060973005
Wounded Boys, Heroic Men: A Man's Guide to Recovering from Child
Abuse by Danial Jay Sonkin and Lenore E. A. Walker. (1998).
Adams Media Corporations; ISBN 1580620108
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