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Illness & Disability

Home : Illness & Disability : Do you know someone with an illness or disability? : My sister/brother has an illness or disability

Are you a young caregiver?

My sister/brother has an illness or disability

An older sister hugging a little sister

It can be tough having a sister or brother with a physical disability, a learning disability, a mental illness, or an illness like cancer or diabetes. If you have a sibling with an illness or disability, you may feel:

  • proud of your sister or brother
  • guilty because you don't have the same struggle
  • lonely because you think no one gets what you're going through or because you don't feel like you get to spend a lot of time with your parents/guardians
  • jealous of all the attention your sister or brother gets

It might seem strange to have such different emotions all at the same time. But all these feelings are normal. Keep in mind, having a sister or brother with an illness or disability makes YOU special for being there for him or her!

Want to talk to others who have a sister or brother with special needs? Check out The Arc's Sibling Support Project. Anne is 14 and has a brother with cerebral palsy. Read her story about the joy and the tough times that come with having a sister or brother with special needs.

Check out what young people with disabled siblings have to say:

I have two younger brothers who are autistic. It doesn't bother me at all and I am not embarrassed very much. I feel bad for people who don't know how to react to them well, it makes me feel bad for them. They are the two cutest little boys I know and if others can't see it then they are missing out. Most of my friends adore my little brothers and like to see them and play with them when they are at my house. This makes me feel good because I know that people out there respect them as people and that makes me proud. I would be ashamed if I was embarrassed of my brothers.
– Maxi, Minnesota

I have a 10-year-old brother with Mild Autism. I hate it but, I deal with it.
– Elizabeth, Illinois

My little brother has a mental disorder. He's 11 now, but when he was younger, I was really embarrassed. Now I love him for who he is.
– Normadi Smith, Ohio

I have three older sisters. Two of them are disabled. I think people that don't have disabled siblings are lucky.
– Ruby

The Sibling Support Project

My parent/grandparent has an illness or disability
One of my friends has an illness or disability

Content last updated June 2, 2007

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office on Women's Health.

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