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Home > Safe Children and Healthy Families are a Shared Responsibility: 2006 Community Resource Packet > Setting Rules and Consequences with Teens Setting Rules and Consequences with Teens
Rules and consequences are critical to negotiating your way through the teen years. Both the rules and the consequences may change as your teen's needs (and desires) develop. It helps to ask yourself some questions about your rules periodically. General questions to ask about rules:
Depending on the answers to these questions and what you've decided is your bottom line, you may be able to negotiate a relaxation of these rules, as your teen is more able to make mature decisions. Or you may find that the rules are entirely unenforceable, meaning either that you need to make changes in your life in order to enforce them or you need to give them up. For example, you may decide that you should arrange your schedule to allow being home more of the time, or simply that you need to be more aware when you are at home. Remember, no matter how reasonable the rules are, it is normal for teens to challenge them. This means that you need to be prepared to impose consequences. Consequences need to meet certain conditions in order to be effective. They should:
What kinds of consequences might be useful with your teen? By Elizabeth Pantley, author of Kid Cooperation and Perfect Parenting © 2002. Elizabeth Pantley, www.pantley.com/elizabeth. The above is an excerpt from Safe Children and Healthy Families Are a Shared Responsibility: |
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