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How You Can Help Your Brother or Sister
Help by Just Being There
Help by Being Thoughtful
Help by Staying Involved
"People
used
to
call
Jessie
and
me
'the
twins.'
We
are
13
months
apart,
but
we
look
so
much
alike
and
we
were
always
together.
Now
that
Jess
has
cancer
she's
lost
all
her
hair
and
--well,
unfortunately,
people
can
tell
us
apart.
Last
week
I
decided
to
do
something
pretty
drastic
to
show
my
sister
how
much
I
love
her.
I
shaved
my
head!
Now,
I
am
not
saying
that
is
the
right
thing
for
all
sisters
to
do--but
it
felt
like
the
right
thing
for
us."
- Renee,
age
15
This section has some
things that others have
done to help their
brother or sister. Pick
one or two things you
may want to try this
week. Then pick a
couple more
next week.
- Hang out together. Watch a movie together. Read or
watch TV together. Decorate your brother's or sister's
bedroom with pictures or drawings. Go to the activity room
at the hospital and play a game or do a project together.
- Comfort one another. Just being in the same room as your
brother or sister can be a big comfort. Do what feels best for
the two of you. Give hugs or say "I love you." Laugh or cry
together. Talk to one another. Or just hang out in silence.
- Help your brother or sister stay in touch with friends.
Ask your sibling's friends to write notes, send pictures, or
record messages. Help your brother or sister send messages
to their friends. If your brother or sister is up for it, invite
friends to hang out with them.
- Share a laugh. You've probably heard that laughter is good
medicine. Watch a comedy or tell jokes together, if that is
your thing.
- Be patient. Be patient with each other. Your brother or
sister may be cranky or even mean. As bad as you feel, your
brother or sister is probably feeling even worse. If you find
you are losing your cool, go for a run, read, or listen to music.
- Make a snack. Make a snack for the two of you to share.
Make a picnic by putting a blanket on the porch or in the
bedroom.
- Buy a new scarf or hat. Your brother or sister might like a
new hat or scarf if they have lost their hair during treatment.
Get a matching hat or scarf for yourself, too.
- Try to be upbeat, but be "real," too. Being positive can
be good for you and your whole family. But don't feel like
you have to act cheerful all the time if that's not how you
really feel. Try to be yourself.
Keep a journal together. Write thoughts or poems,
doodle, or put photos in a notebook. Take turns with your
sibling writing in a journal. This can help you both share
your thoughts when it might be hard to talk about them.
Go for a walk together. If your brother or sister feels up to
it, take a walk together. Or, open a window or sit on the front
porch together.
The ideas above are for those times when you have extra energy
to give. Don't forget to take care of yourself, too. You deserve it.
Read more about taking care of yourself in the section
Taking Care of Yourself.
Can you think of some other ways to help your brother
or sister?
Make your own list
here:
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