Actually away from my pain station and heading to an early Benjamin Button screening. Fincher's doing a Q&A. Then back home for tears. about 3 hours ago from twitterrific |
Okay, assignments for the day. You there, I want you and your team to man the perimeter and draw the lightning away from me while I work. about 11 hours ago from web |
I hope the one follower that responds only to correct spelling mistakes is a bot. Imagine CHOOSING to exist exclusively like that. about 11 hours ago from web |
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The invisible force also scrambles my awareness of the proper use of "its" and "its", insidious as it is. about 11 hours ago from web |
As is my routine, I was thrown out of bed by an invisible force, hovered before the computer as it powered up on it's own, and got to work. about 11 hours ago from web |
Looking for a customer service number to call on the 'Golden Compass' dvd to ask how I can get those thousand hours of my life back. 1:47 PM Dec 14th from web |
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You, with the mop and bonesaw. Get in the dressing room and clean up what's left of my last visitor. My work here is done. 4:26 PM Dec 13th from web |
You, with the short hair and the backpack full of Xbox live gamerpoint certificates...wait for me in my dressing room/janitor's room. 2:57 PM Dec 13th from web |
No...I'm not kidding. I AM a rockstar. The rumors ARE true. I'm on stage right now, as a matter of fact, covering The Final Countdown. 2:54 PM Dec 13th from web |
Saturday! I'm crayzehh with my Final Cut Pro and my cup of tea. All those internet rumors about me being an insane rockstar are true! 2:54 PM Dec 13th from web |
I don't know about this juice, guys. I just don't know. 9:57 AM Dec 12th from web |
If that's your kinda silliness, check out Daniel Pemberton's other release, TVPOPMUZIK. Fun, dig? 6:49 AM Dec 11th from web |
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You are, instead, eaten by a Leprechaun flanked by a small entourage of goblins riding unicorns. 3:04 PM Dec 10th from web |
Note: You are in no danger of being eaten by a grue, as grues are mythical beings. Stop being stupid, please. No, really. Please. 3:03 PM Dec 10th from web |
The lights go out and you are plunged into the kind of darkness only a Jamba Juice is capable of containing. Will you light a match? 2:24 PM Dec 10th from web |
You pull your pants up and loot the corpse and find a ring that gives you +2 to vitaboost. Your crotch reeks of strawberries and bananas. 12:07 PM Dec 10th from web |
You wake up in a squalid Jamba Juice, pants and underwear around your ankles upon the naked corpse of the ex-manager. What do you do first? 10:58 AM Dec 10th from web |