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Of course, there are instances a 3AM pot of coffee is morally justifiable: If you're working to rescue your men after a mine cave-in, say. |
My big conundrum with having no set sleep pattern is: When the hell do you make a pot of coffee? Now? Always? 3AM Coffee feels so indecent. |
I'm planting a riot of bushes, vines and trees, so my place becomes a secret jungle. My neighbors tend to plant old cars, which is nice too. |
Here are my choices: Reheat my stale slices of homemade meatball pizza, crack my European history book, or take a bath. Solution? All three! |
@EliseCassandra Twittering leads to harder stuff. |
@fourfs Loaf of bread, carton of milk, carton of milk, loaf of bread, macaroni and cheese box, macaroni and cheese box, AHHH, pineapple! |
Junkie logic: If I'm Twittering so much I may as well be playing Tetris. Off the wagon after four years clean. I can't wait for the dreams. |
@hodgman Also: reference to archaic Semitic gods=bupkis. Fortunately I have a long history of not pleasing people with words, so I Tweet on. |
I watched out the window as the mailman tried to fit both the 1300 page hardback books I ordered into my mailbox. The loser: my New Yorker. |
@hotdogsladies My email won't let me open Evites. It's weird. |
I forget whether it's Beelshamen, Ba'al or Hedad that makes the weather, but whatever god it is, they're sucking. No wonder I don't believe. |
@hodgman Mixology is a pseudo-science! They rope you in with their "personality drinks", and pretty soon you're tithing 20 percent. Beware!! |
I wonder what life was like for Native Americans in the Northwest, back when the land was all forest. Must've been cold and rainy, like now. |
Had morning coffee comparing notes with other bird fanciers on where the crows sleep, where they go in the morning and what their plans are. |
It's pouring rain, my barn door just jumped its track, and dude from the lumber yard dropping off 20 bags of concrete said: s'posed to snow. |
I love being up at 8AM. It makes me feel like I'm one of the "people" who live in the "world". It's good for a few weeks before it's a drag. |
An old lesson re: sledgehammering. If you sledgehammer when you haven't sledgehammered recently, take it easy: sledgehammering reverberates. |
If you're going to hold your Glock all sideways and shit, don't expect to hit anything unless you're actually touching it with your barrel. |
The movie time online doesn't match the ad, so I call. Recorded voice sends me back online. Homepage? Redirect. Ken? Lonny? meet Mohammed |
I've been using swear words in my status updates today and, man, it's really liberated me. The "street" vernacular gets closer to the truth. |
