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@monica_navarro You're not kidding, love. My car hates me. That said, I'll be taking it to visit you in Philly soon. |
Oh nos! Flat tire! |
If I go to Sam's party, I'll be about twice the age of everyone there. That's okay, though, 'cause it's legal now. |
@gurj "Gurjburger: Made with 100% douche!" |
Gawker commenters perving on cousin Nicola today as if @Bronques wrote each one: http://tinyurl.com/556egy |
Why are gays silent about this new Che Guevara movie? Che imprisoned gays just for being gay. Is it only 'cause he looked good on t-shirts? |
Screaming at Bank of America has been a monthly occurrence since May. You'd figure I'd learn by now but you'd be figuring wrong. |
I've set it up so that whenever my bank account goes below a certain amount, my bank emails me, "Stop spending money. You're almost poor." |
@tromano What for? She's not as funny. Then again, maybe she is |
Now following @LOLhan and so should you, too. KTHANXBAI. |
@gurj Know any Punjabi girls to set up my tow truck driver with? He's really nice, except for his excessive spitting. |
@tromano is that a good yeaaaaaaaaa or a bad yeaaaaaaaaa? |
@tromano I do. Oh, wait... I'm in NYC. Never mind. |
Car brokedown on corner of Bushwick and Metropolitan. Gas station dude particularly unhelpful. Getting towed to Manhattan. |
@tromano "Month Without Frat Boy Douchebags" may already be hapening. It's called "layoffs at investment banks". |
Why "Day Without Gays"? I want "Month Without Frat Boy Douchebags" instead. |
@ultragrrrl The biggest pick-up line used buy Island Def Jam employees is, "So... Wanna meet The Killers?" |
Doesn't matter who wins in the battle between Coldplay and Joe Satriani because we all lose when they continue to record boring crap. |
If I had known it would be this warm, I would've biked to work. |
My car is like 1940s Soviet propaganda: It's all about stallin'. |
