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You are, instead, eaten by a Leprechaun flanked by a small entourage of goblins riding unicorns. |
Note: You are in no danger of being eaten by a grue, as grues are mythical beings. Stop being stupid, please. No, really. Please. |
The lights go out and you are plunged into the kind of darkness only a Jamba Juice is capable of containing. Will you light a match? |
You pull your pants up and loot the corpse and find a ring that gives you +2 to vitaboost. Your crotch reeks of strawberries and bananas. |
You wake up in a squalid Jamba Juice, pants and underwear around your ankles upon the naked corpse of the ex-manager. What do you do first? |
Please play again. |
Too late, you learn your parents met at the market reaching for the same value tub of peanut butter. You fade away, screaming like a jerk. |
Your sympathies towards those with peanut allergies lead you to sacrifice the noble Carver with his fine mustache. You press the button. |
You gather, from his peanuty ramblings, that pressing the button would rewrite history so that he never lived. What do you do? |
and attempts to dissuade you from pressing the button, but he is unable to not convolute his argument with references to peanuts. |
You have chosen to press the button, but before you can, George Washington Carver appears from a dimensional tear in time - |
You have broken the glass, losing an eye and piercing your groin in the process. Had enough, or do you press the mysterious button? |
A clear button, pulsing with a red glow. The button is covered in glass to avoid accidental use. What do you do? What DO you do? |
@capnshady You've never heard the story of Pottybot? Well..:music starts up: just sit right down and I'll sing you a tale. Doodoobeedeeee. |
Just got an achievement from @pottybot for my last message. See if you can grab one as well. |
Fuck! I woke up all fat and stupid today. |
INT. CONFESSION BOOTH - DAY. PRIEST: What do you wish to confess, my son? MAN: I punched her in the cunt with my dick. PRIEST: Awesome. |
A waiter did appear, however, and I challenged him to bring the check. Long story short - HE DID. I'm pretty much unstoppable these days. |
During my meal, I threw my spoon down and challenged the Devil to a Pho eating contest, but he never materialized. Resumed eating. |
Did I already tell the story that ends with "I'm gonna punch your cunt with my dick?" I can't remember the rest of it anyhow. |
