The @plinky office doors are very slammy, which makes anything said right before closing one sound passive-aggressive: "I agree! *SLAM*" 10:40 AM Dec 2nd from twitterrific |
How is the woman in the billing dept. at my doctor's office making me feel really bad for wacky shit in their system? Man, she is GOOD! 4:55 PM Dec 1st from twitterrific |
Have you ever resisted saying something out loud because you wanted to Twitter it instead?Neither have I. I was just asking. #garthalgar 4:53 PM Dec 1st from twitterrific |
Sometimes I like working on legal pads because they don't have any way to see what other people have written on their legal pads. 2:26 PM Dec 1st from twitterrific |
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Whenever I visit twitter.com, I like to imagine the call to action as screamed by someone who's angry with me: "What are you DOING?!?!?!" 9:46 AM Nov 28th from web |
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You know your wife is awesome when instead of being mad at you for losing your wedding ring, she asks if you need a martini. 7:30 PM Nov 26th from twitterrific |
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You know what's a shitty way to start off a holiday weekend? Losing your wedding ring. Guess it beats wedding a ringing loser. (Badump-cha!) 5:11 PM Nov 26th from twitterrific |
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Drinking Woodford Reserve for the same reason I bought a New Order record a few months ago: seems like I should like it. 10:54 PM Nov 25th from twitterrific |
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