Lately, most of our arguments end, "When you can wear a monocle, that's when you can wear my cape!" Damn fancy dog. about 19 hours ago from web |
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Oh, Boxee! Why are you telling my friends I watched_Brown Bunny? I only watched… the tip. So it doesn't count. Also, Head Case isn't horror.... about 21 hours ago from web |
I can't say I blame Sweetness for being excited to come home to me next week. I'm the guy that just invented Breakfast Ramen. 11:31 AM yesterday from web |
I just made macaroni and cheese… IN THE MICROWAVE.
Don't be jealous, kid. That's just how I do. 8:06 PM Dec 6th from web |
I'd invite you over but I'm beat and the dog just released a devastating fart.
…OR ARE THEY?!! 6:55 PM Dec 6th from web |
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"Now heres a song… I'd like to dedicate… to all… the mini-skirts" - Otis Redding, _Try a Little Tenderness (Live)_ 4:47 PM Dec 6th from twitterrific |
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A car pulls up who can it be,
The nice neighbor lady with a recipe
She rolled down her window and started to say,
"My boy keeps playing GTA" 1:54 PM Dec 6th from web |
Walkin' this bitch is my daily chore
+Washin' the dishes,
Moppin' the floor
Went to the yard to scoop the poop
shit's so nasty I had to puke 1:49 PM Dec 6th from web |
Aphorism update 2008: Laying off Peter to pay Shareholder Paul. 1:27 PM Dec 6th from web |
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What's it say about me that when someone famous dies, I obsess about the ad placement on their nytimes.com obit? 11:33 AM Dec 6th from web |
In sports news, 13 yrs to the day after he was acquitted for murder, OJ Simpson accepted a 9-33 year scholarship to criminal college. Tom? 10:30 AM Dec 6th from web |
Whatever shall I put into this old fashioned glass? 7:09 PM Dec 5th from web |
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