Hey there! Remiel is using Twitter.
Twitter is a free service that lets you keep in touch with people through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing? Join today to start receiving Remiel's updates.
|
It might SEEM like Adobe Acrobat updates itself too often, but bear in mind the complexities of displaying PICTURES OF FUCKING PAPER. |
Been ignoring emails from the Obama campaign for weeks now, but the provocatively abbreviated subject line "The White Ho..." almost got me. |
Also: I chilled a ham in Pinot. What, you want Zin wine? |
If changing the venue of a fucking pun ends up being the most offensive thing I ever do on here, I really will kill a man in Reno for fun. |
I cockpunched a man in Vegas, just to crotch whim ply. |
PayPal is one of those services people want so badly, they'll doggedly endure almost any indignity required of them. See also: Ticketmaster. |
Dear Everything: UNSUBSCRIBE |
Crap. I just realized I can make most anything I post sound stupid with a mental recitation, followed by a condescending "oh ho ho!" |
... and if anyone suspects my last 2 posts are related: NO, my girlfriend's NOT torn between me and Johnny Depp. (He won't return her calls) |
FYI: it takes 157 words, including "Do we agree we must discuss further/sooner/later/never?" to say "shit or get off the pot" diplomatically |
I thought it coincidence that every girl I've dated is hot for Johnny Depp, but now I realize it's only because I haven't dated any lesbians |
Much love also to @kolebee, @itsbynnereel, @vmarinelli for the replies. Um... to get to the other side. |
Forget "Followers". I want a tally of people tolerating me enough to let me vibrate their pockets during dinner. (Inspired by a @girk chat.) |
If I had a dollar for every complaint I overheard... I'd never shut up. |
I really do want to be cremated. I like the idea of potentially being confused with Sanka. |
dimple, lime, vicissitude, ass-face, mitochondria, hiccup #6randomwords |
@hotdogsladies We didn't know you were offering! #6wordhint |
I wanted cremated assholes, you assholes! #grossRestaurantComplaints |
I wanted to be cremated, assholes! #6wordepitaph |
See this watch? This watch cost more than your car company. ( @scottsimpson) |
