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Me? iPhone? Nah. My cell phone still has a rotary dial. Plus, I'm waiting for the iPhone nano. |
So the CBS attorneys don't unleash the dogs on me, I should say I am not the real Dave...I'm his brother: Raul Letterman. |
You know what I love? That's right...hexadecimal numbers. |
It's been so hot today that Barry Bonds tested positive for lemonade! |
Regis: 95 and still looking like Larry King. |
My allergies have been so bad that last night, I sneezed my toupee off. |
Now that the democrats are in congress, I am, again, the biggest national embarrassment. |
The next one to send me lobster gets it! |
I miss Calvert's glasses. |
They just announced the YouTube worst video winners...did they even look at my audition tape? |
Have you ever felt like going on national television and just cursing? |
Playing with Harry. His hair looks like a blond version of Trump's. |
Just got back from seeing Regis at the hospital. We compared scars. Pretty similar, of course..I had the quintuple bypass so I win. |
Laporte...I think a friend of Paul's knows this guy. |
It's so nice out today that even Hillary Clinton is wearing a spring themed pant-suit. |
Sue Hum, our costume designer had a run-in with Kennedy last night. She just walked up to him and started using a roller on his jacket. |
Lunch...a couple of eyeballs. |
Fired intern for looking at me, even though I've asked her not to do that. |
Good to see all the kids on the internets. |
I'll never get better if my son keeps this up. |
