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Laura Wopp's Story
I had my first drink when I was 6 yrs old; I was in my first AODA treatment ctr. at age 15. I am now 46 and just recently I celebrated 2 yrs of sobriety (but it always seems longer...doesn't it? ;-)
From age 16 to present I was in & out of treatment programs. I have the Big Book memorized upside down and crossways. AA/NA were quite important in my earlier years, I needed to belong to a group of brave ppl & that's what I found in AA. I had relapses over & over. They always tell you that when you hit bottom, next is death. In my family, everyone has has Major Depression Disorder & my 4 older brothers were all drug dealers. To date, I have lost 2 of my brothers to suicide. AODA had me not just hitting the bottom but all the drugs & drinking turned my depressive disorder into suicidal rage. I was in ICU about every 2 weeks from OD's, once the alohol had me feeling utterly lost forever, so I took an OD that put me in a 4 day coma. I was told later that no one believed that I'd survive. AODA screwed up relationships, had me so whacked that my Psych MD finally found no other choice but to run me through a series of ECT's........I couldn't stay alive for myself or my husband (who I love w/ such an intensity). I went through an outpatient AODA program during the ECT's. After about 2 years I had received 70 ECTs. Thanks to the AODA & the ECT's I have 4 years that I don't even remember. I kept journals, but to this day--I am afraid to read them. I am not sure I want to know what happened during that zapped out period. I do not go to AA/NA....I know all I need to know, my husband quit with me & we keep each other in check.
But, you know what? I became a mental health consumer advocate & really DO NOT want to drink or drug anymore. I am giving a "voice" to my fellow spirits who are in recovery w/ me. I also had an addition to self-injury while I drank. I have not SI-ed for over 6 months now. I ran across a quote awhile ago and it has become my new "life motto"
"When there is HOPE in recovery...
There is POWER in the present!"
I have had such a less depressed life, no OD's but they still only give me a weeks supply of meds b/c I cannot predict my "depressive episodes" that hit me from out of the blue.
Being an advocate helps me help myself by helping those around me.....
There IS hope for all!
Just as an afterthought; They say the botom of AODA addiction is death........I've been there & still went back to my death of a life. I have died several times.....but after 2 years, I am enjoying LIFE!!!!
Madison, Wisconsin
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