[NIFL-WOMENLIT:2576] Re: outcome of conversation with husband

From: Robert Stein (begindev@hotmail.com)
Date: Mon May 12 2003 - 12:29:49 EDT


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Date: Mon, 12 May 2003 12:29:49 -0400 (EDT)
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From: "Robert Stein" <begindev@hotmail.com>
To: Multiple recipients of list <nifl-womenlit@literacy.nifl.gov>
Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:2576] Re: outcome of conversation with husband
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>From: Mary Lou Sewell <mlsewl@yahoo.com>
>Reply-To: nifl-womenlit@nifl.gov
>To: Multiple recipients of list <nifl-womenlit@literacy.nifl.gov>
>Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:2575] Re: outcome of conversation with husband
>Date: Mon, 12 May 2003 10:49:48 -0400 (EDT)
>
>That was a tough situation.  Thank goodness you
>handled it the way you did and that it worked out
>well.
>Congratulations on a good job.
>Mary Lou
>--- Daphne Greenberg <alcdgg@langate.gsu.edu> wrote:
> > Thanks for all the responses regarding the husband
> > who called regarding his wife's participation in the
> > reading research project. I found all of your
> > listserv responses and your private responses to me
> > very interesting, and descriptive of the
> > complexities of such an event.
> > As promised, here were my thoughts/concerns and what
> > I ended up doing:
> > My immediate gut reaction was I am not going to call
> > him back and that I would ask her about it the next
> > time I saw her. Then I started to wonder whether she
> > is involved in a violent relationship and wondered
> > if that were the case-would it be better for her if
> > I called. I worried that by not calling him back, I
> > might make him angry at her. But I still worried
> > about calling him, because he may not know that she
> > has literacy problems-what if she is secretly going
> > to the literacy program? How do I know how much to
> > tell him about the research project? So I waited.
> > The first day that she did not return to her
> > literacy program, I figured-okay coincidence. The
> > second day, I figured, she could be sick. By the
> > third day I got nervous. Especially because he left
> > a few messages on my voice mail. So, eventhough I
> > didn't want to call him-I did. He answered and I
> > told him who I was and that I was returning his
> > call. He wanted information about the reading
> > project so that he could decide w!
> > hether it made sense for his wife to do it. I felt
> > like asking him why I needed to talk to him about
> > that, but didn't. Instead I asked him what specific
> > questions he had. He wanted to know the exact times,
> > days, and locations of the class. Once I told him,
> > he thanked me. I then asked him if he thought she
> > would be attending. I asked him this because it
> > seemed clear to me that he would be deciding this.
> > He told me that he thought that she would be too
> > busy to attend 4 days a week 2 hours a day. I asked
> > him if he had any other questions and he said no and
> > we said good bye.
> > She came back to the literacy program the next day.
> > I asked her if she wanted to join our literacy
> > research project and she declined, saying that she
> > didn't have the time. I told her that I understood
> > and asked her if she would be able to continue her
> > regular literacy program which met 2 days a week for
> > 2 hours. She said yes. I am glad to report that I
> > have noticed that she has been able to attend her
> > regular program
> > Daphne
> >
> > Daphne Greenberg
> > Associate Director
> > Center for the Study of Adult Literacy
> > MSC 6A0360
> > Georgia State University
> > 33 Gilmer Street SE Unit 6
> > Atlanta, GA 30303-3086
> > phone: 404-651-0127
> > fax:404-651-4901
> > dgreenberg@gsu.edu
>
>
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