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Is your daughter a bully?

Because girls tend to bully in less obvious ways than boys, it is often hard to determine if your daughter is a bully. Talk to your daughter regularly and be on the lookout for signs of bullying, such as suddenly dropping a close friend.

A bully often:

• seeks to dominate and/or manipulate others
• enjoys feeling powerful and in control (whether real or not)
• seems to get satisfaction from other’s fears, discomfort, or pain
• is good at hiding behaviors or doing them where adults can’t notice
• is excited by conflicts between others
• blames others for his/her problems
• displays intolerance and prejudice towards others
• lacks empathy towards others

If you think your daughter is a bully…

• Tell her that bullying is NOT acceptable behavior.
• Tell her the penalties for bullying and be sure that you enforce them fairly and consistently.
• Help her learn other ways to deal with anger and frustration.
• Teach and reward better behavior.
• Work out a way for her to apologize for the bullying.
• Help her to understand how her bullying has affected the person who has been bullied.
• Seek help or counseling if the bullying does not stop.
• If contacted by the school, stay calm; try not to become angry and defensive. Make an effort to really listen. Keep in mind, this is about the well-being of your child.

Talk to your daughter.
Is your daughter being bullied?

Content last updated November 11, 2007

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