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Relationships
Help! My Parents/Guardians Don't Like My Friend(s)!
What are some reasons parents/guardians give for not liking their teen’s friends?
It can be common for parents/guardians and teens to run into conflict about friendships. Parents/guardians sometimes worry that their teen is hanging out with the wrong crowd.
Parents/guardians may be concerned about things like drugs, alcohol, sex, skipping school, missing curfew, body piercings, or tattoos. Some parents/guardians may think body piercings and tattoos are signs of other behaviors, like drinking or smoking.
What can a teen do if her parents/guardians don’t like her friend(s)?
It depends on the type of relationship the teen has with her parents/guardians.
Some parents/guardians and teens can talk to each other and work through problems. Both parties trust each other and they know that they can work through things. In this case, the teen can sit down and talk with her parents/guardians and try to work things out.
Sometimes, the relationship is already strained. In this case, it can be helpful to bring in an outside person to help resolve things or mediate. This could be a school counselor, school social worker, clergy member, family doctor, therapist, mentor, coach, or favorite aunt.
Can you explain how a social worker might help in this situation?
Sure. Let’s say Sue is having problems with her parents because they don’t like her friend Mary Jean. Sue has a good relationship with her school social worker, so she tells her what’s going on. The social worker may help Sue clarify her thinking, so she sounds as thoughtful and reasonable as possible when she talks to her parents. Or he or she may help Sue think through how to present her ideas and have Sue role play talking to her parents. Or the social worker may bring Sue and her parents together and serve as a mediator.
Source: This advice comes from Frederic Reamer, PhD, professor of social work at Rhode Island College, Providence.
What is a social worker?
A social worker is a professional who helps people through tough times in their lives.
What is a mediator?
A mediator is an outside person who helps people work through fights.
Content last updated June 26, 2008
