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Illness & Disability

Talking to the doctor

Being able to talk freely with your doctor will not only make you feel better, it will also help your doctor better know how to care for you.

5 Tips for talking with your doctor

Smiling female doctor

1. Stay positive
It will help to go to your doctor’s visits with a good attitude. It’s also important to remember that your doctor and other caregivers are on your side. Think teamwork! Think positive!

2. Keep track of how you are feeling
Your doctor visits will be easier if you keep notes on how you are feeling. This will make it easier for you to answer questions about your symptoms and how medicines make you feel. This also makes it easier for you to bring up anything that you are worried about. Make sure to be honest about where it hurts and how long it’s been hurting. Also let your doctor know how you feel about your health and treatments. Are you scared, worried, or sad? Your care will be easier if your doctor knows how you are feeling. Get a helpful worksheet to print and fill out for your next doctor’s visit.

Your doctor can also tell you about counselors and support groups to help you talk about your feelings. Find support groups.

3. Bring a list of your current medications to your appointment
You and your parents need to bring a list of all the medicines you take with you to your appointment. If you are able to take medicines you can buy at the pharmacy without a prescription (an order from the doctor), make sure to also include them in your list. This way, the doctor doesn’t have to look through your records to see what you are taking and you can spend more time talking about how you are feeling.

Teen reading

4. Read about your condition
It will help to learn as much as you can about your illness or disability by reading information from your doctor, national organizations, the library, and the Internet. You can also learn about it by talking to adults and other girls who have the same illness or disability. Make sure to talk to your doctor about what you learn because not all information you will find on the Internet is good. Find on-line information about different illnesses and disabilities.

5. Ask questions
Do not be afraid to ask your doctor any questions you have. This will help you understand your own health better. To remember all the questions you have even when you are not in the doctor’s office, write them down and bring the list with you to your appointments. You can also write down what your doctor says. Be sure to talk with your parents about the things you want to ask the doctor. This will make getting answers even easier!

Ask special questions about your treatment

While some health problems do not need treatment, most of them can be helped by medicine, surgery, changes in daily habits such as what you eat, or a few of these together. You will get the most out of treatments when you understand what is going on and when you and your parents make choices together. In case your doctor talks about a new treatment at your next visit, here are some questions you can print or write down to take with you:

  • How long will it take?
  • What will happen? (Is it a shot, pill or operation?)
  • Will it hurt?
  • How many treatments do I have to have?
  • Will I be able to go to school?
  • Are there things I won’t be able to do, such as ride a bike?
  • Is this treatment to try to cure my health problem or help take away some of my symptoms?
  • Will these treatments make me tired or feel pain? How long will this last?
  • What happens if I miss a treatment?
  • What will we do if the treatments don't work?
  • Is this the best treatment out there for me?

For some health problems, and depending on the patient, there is more than one treatment the doctor can give you. If the treatment you get makes you feel badly, it is okay to ask if there are others you can try. There may not be others, but you and your doctor can talk about it.

Talking about personal things

It’s okay to be nervous about talking to your doctor about things that make you uncomfortable. Who wants to talk to a strange adult about sex, feeling sad, or what you eat? But it’s easier than you think. Doctors are there to talk about everything that is going on with your body, and they will never think any less of you – no matter what you ask or what your problem is. In fact, they are very used to personal issues (and they likely have had to seek help for their own!). It is also very important for your health that you tell them everything that is going on with you. By not telling them about a strange smell, rash, pain, or anything else going on with your body, you could be making a health problem worse.

Talking about personal issues with your doctor can be confidential, which means that your doctor has to keep everything you say secret. Doctors might feel they have to tell your parents what you say if they think you are in danger or aren't able to make choices on your own. Ask your doctor about the privacy policy before you begin.

Content last updated June 2, 2007

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Office on Women's Health.

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