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Juliet Escoria @JulietEscoria
Juliet Escoria @JulietEscoria
West Virginia
"the right stuff"
julietescoria.com
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Do you have any advice on being in a long distance relationship?
Sure. Talk on the phone and skype a lot. I hate talking on the phone and would often prefer text, but a lot of times text conversations would cause arguments. It was really helpful to see each other's faces and hear the tone in our voices.
You have to really trust the person. So if you don't trust them 100%, then maybe it's not worth being in the relationship. Seems like a good rule for regular relationships, come to think of it.
Long distance relationships are hard and probably rarely sustainable in the long run. For me, it was more difficult to be long distance than it's been to live with Scott. It came to a point where I knew one of us would have to move, and I realized that Scott would have to give up his kids if he was to move to be with me. (Plus he has a full time job with benefits and I did not.) So even though it's a really weird thing to move from San Diego to wv, I knew I had to move to be with him. So I guess the advice there is be prepared to sacrifice, and come up with a definitive plan so you can live in the same city someday. Knowing that we would live together in (x amount of time) really helped get us through.
I think it also helped that I know my intuition is generally excellent. My gut told me moving to be with Scott was the right thing to do, so I remembered that any time that I felt fear about moving. It took me a lot of time and life experience to have that good of intuition, though, so idk if any good advice can be gleaned from that.
Where can I find these conversations people are having about the trope of the magical negro. I've never been.  Hollywood Daddy
There's probably something on jezebel lol
If that doesn't work try Wikipedia
what does southern gothic mean to you? i'm not american and i'm fascinated by certain southern writers. one day i plan to fly to new orleans.
the only writer i would be completely comfortable with labeling as southern gothic is flannery o'connor, i think.
i feel like i am the wrong person to ask. west virginia is actually not in the south, and even if you, like most people, thought that it was-- i'm an outsider myself. (i am making an assumption that you are asking me this because i live in WV, so forgive me if i am wrong.) i grew up in southern california, in a neighborhood where everything is clean and white and the only bad stuff that happens happens behind closed doors. because of this, the whole southern gothic thing is fascinating and appealing to me probably in the same way that it is to you-- it seems "authentic" and mysterious and exotic. it also seems very "american" to me, in a way that coastal california can never be. "salt of the earth"-type stuff.
in southern california, the people who annoy me are people in big expensive german cars who act entitled. in west virginia, the people who annoy me are drug addicts. drug addicts are generally more interesting and mysterious-seeming than rich assholes.
but there is something incredibly inaccurate in this... drug addiction, observed close up, is incredibly boring and pathetic, and not interesting and tragic. poverty isn't more "real" or "authentic" than being upper middle class, it's just more difficult. and a lot of times -- in america, at least -- we treat poverty as though it is some sort of stamp of "authenticity" -- like you grew up poor so therefore you know what you're talking about -- but the reality is that poor people are silenced and looked down on and thrown into jail, etc. people talk about problematic tropes like the Magical Negro; i kind of think the appeal of southern gothic falls into the same sort of thinking... the Magical Poor Southern Person, or something.
but there is something legit in the idea of it, something non-exploitative... something dark and scary and enchanting... the land, when you go to west virginia, feels heavy and full of death. at night i see weird shadows coming out of the mountains. i haven't really been to mississippi, but scott says it is like that and more there. i do think you can feel the history of a land in its soil-- when i visited charleston, south carolina, it was a very beautiful city, very clean, but something in it felt just heavy and dirty and full of pain. in san diego, the only time i ever get anything interesting off the soil is in the wild areas, like the canyons.
i am going to new orleans for the first time at the end of the month and very excited about it-- the thing that appeals to me most about new orleans is its magical/witchy history.
maybe i would have a better answer for this after living in WV for longer.
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what have you been reading of late? what has scott been reading of late?
i just finished "i await the devil's coming" and i really liked it. i read ana carrete's "why-fi" on the plane and really loved it, i love ana's writing so much. i am reading shelly oria's story collection now and i love some of the stories but some of the others are "meh." the last book i devoured was "dept. of speculation" by jenny offill. i brought excavation by wendy ortiz with me out to california, along with "the most of it" by mary ruefle, so i am going to be reading those next. (jenny offill was my prof. in grad school and i emailed her to tell her how much i liked dept. of speculation and she told me to read the mary ruefle)
scott has been keeping track of what he's been reading and liking on his tumblr, although he is a little behind:
http://scottmcclanahan.tumblr.com/
What's scott like in bed? Hope that's not too personal.
"hope that's not too personal" lol
i am reluctant to answer this question... it makes me uncomfortable to answer it but that uncomfortableness makes me want to answer it more
i think having sex with scott is probably a lot like what it is like to have sex with myself, which sometimes makes our sex comical because both of us are just so... neurotic... cerebral... and sometimes it's hard to get out of my head and into my body
but he is the kind of person who is into making his partner happy and does all the things it would take to do that, which, for me, means he is a little on the rough side and includes some domination & degradation
imagining my mom reading this *blushing*
I'd never heard of kava before u mentioned it in yr story, should I try it -- what's yr review of kava KAVA  chris dankland
i think you should.
kava is the only legit "non-drug" drug i've ever tried. like, it definitely does something and the thing it does is definitely enjoyable-- every other non-drug drug either seems like BS to me or is just not very fun.
it is the most fun/most powerful if you drink it in the "proper" method, as described in the story. i tried to make it at home and it was never as good as it is at that kava bar. kava bars are kind of hard to find though, so i would recommend buying the powder and not the stuff that is prepackaged. kava drink is way way nasty so if you can't stomach it, just put the powder into gel caps yourself.
i used to take it before readings a lot but then i stopped getting quite so nervous. i haven't taken any in a while. i'm at my mom's and there's some of my old stuff in the cupboard, hmm i think i will take some now.
it is really nice stuff, in general, although it makes you pee a lot and it made my bones kind of hurt when i was taking it a lot. i like it because it does a mild version of what a lot of my favorite drugs do, i.e. is relaxing/euphoria-inducing like pills, makes your mouth numb like coke, makes you trip out a lil like weed
woah
i love infographics like this. they've become even more interesting after moving to WV, cus generally WV's data is the opposite of CA and NYC.
wish i could pause it and study it better
it makes me angry that methadone is even on there. methadone makes me so angry.
at first this image would not display and i imagined it was a silly pic of ben lerner's face
I've read you in the anthology "40 Likely to Die Before 40", I love how you write. I am from Colombia, a hug.  Didier Andrés Castro
thank you, i think it is so cool when people from other countries read my work.
colombia seems really cool.
hopefully there will be a spanish edition of black cloud in not too long.
hug.
1 person likes this
Soooooooo... tell me more about Scott!  Hollywood Daddy
scott's on the other side of the country, i'm busy hanging out with this dog
Soooooooo... tell me more about Scott!
2 people like this
maybe scott should get his own fucking ask.fm  Juliet Escoria
i agree
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i think it is annoying how people ask so many questions about scott. scott is so much less cool and interesting than you, juliet.  Juliet Escoria
i agree
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has scott ever had kidney stones? that story freaked me out and now I'm trying to drink 6-8 glasses of water a day also, do ya'll have health insurance or nah
yes that story is mostly true, no cross-shaped stones tho.
when scott and i first started... dating?... he had urine that was kind of brown. he tried to make me look at it and i refused. i told him he needed to go to a doctor. he snap chatted a pic of his brown urine and i refused to look at it. YUCK. he assumed the brown urine was nbd and just more kidney issues. i was freaked out though but i guess it actually was nbd because the brown urine went away once he stopped drinking and taking copious amounts of advil PM every night before bed.
drinking lots of water is good, i have frequent headaches and it really seems to help. i recommend lots of water even if u aren't afraid of kidney stones.
yes we have health insurance. it is through the state and i guess it is really good. my flu shot was free. the IUD that i am getting in a couple weeks will be free. before we were married i had health insurance through my stepmother because i am "disabled," this freaked me out but this was before obamacare and ppl like me were fucked so you gotta do what you can, u kno u kno
Are you feeding your husband? He looks too skinny. I think you feminists who don't take care of your men suck!
i like to bake pie
Lol. So what does scott like his penis to be called? (hoping it's 'sir mcclanahan of the round table')
dick or cock
i blame the porn industry for that
1 person likes this
I wish that trans stood for transcendance. I think people in between genders should feel like gods and if I was god, I would definitely make sure they felt that way. What in the world would you change if you were god?
i agree, it has always seemed so dumb to me when people apply a gender to god. if god resembles a person, i imagine they are both genders and also no genders. my preferred pronoun for god is "it"
i would prefer for there to be less suffering, all around. there's a lot of suffering up in this place.
1 person likes this
I love you and want to have urs and scotts bb. I don't want to raise it, though. I have too much going on. Do you think this could be arranged?
yeah i need a surrogate probably cus this bish is crazyyyyyyy and needs psych meds
you got a good womb?
womb room
Haha. No, I wouldn't have done it anonymously.  Hollywood Daddy
scott doesn't like when i call his penis a penis
Hi Juliet, I'm sorry for all the mean things I've said about you and the spamming I supported and engaged in. I only did it to cover up my insecurities and lack of talent. Could you help me publish my next shitty volume of poetry? I would really appreciate it. Love, Alexandra Naughton
::laughing::
Is this jereme dean
but in a way your thing with ben lerner is like my thing with mira maybe. but maybe the difference is that i would have sex with mira. and you wouldn't with ben lerner.
I don't hate Ben Lerner, I just don't think he's a very good person. Seems like the kind of person who thinks he is a really good person which is way worse than being a shitty person and just being cool with being shitty. I do like his fiction tho. I also imagine he got good jokes at parties. BUT FOR REAL YO HE AINT GOT NO SHOULDERS. Boy is built like a surfboard. Ride the tiger.
i think ben lerner has a slappable face. do you think ben lerner has a slappable face? the respected new yorker critic james wood reviewed him you know?
Yeah he got some cheeks I bet they would sound real good getting a lil spanking spank spank spank lil Benny boyyyyy
Stay cool.
DONT TELL ME HOW TO LIVE
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U are v v v pretty and v v funny and v nice
thank you, that is sweet of you to say. i think i might know who asked this and if it is indeed the person i am thinking of, you are also v v v pretty and v v funny and v nice yourself
Who usually apologizes first
Scott does but we're both pretty good at apologizing.
Are you and scott astrologically compatible?
I'm not sure. He is a gemini-cancer cusp and i am a leo-virgo cusp. Is that compatible?
Your pleas to ID via twitter had me cracking up. Thank you for making me laugh, I have been in intense physical pain all day. You can watch many full episodes on Youtube but they randomly get deleted by the YT cops. Jerks. ANYWAYZ: what episode on ID of any series seemed to creep you out most
THEY NEVER RESPONDED TO MY TWEETS OR FACEBOOK POSTS SO FUCK THEM!!!!!!!!!!!
ID didn't/doesn't ever really creep me out. I watch murder shows before bed because I find them soothing for whatever reason. I wrote about it kinda here:
http://thoughtcatalog.com/juliet-escoria/2013/12/16-steps-to-kill-someone-and-not-get-caught/
Some shows that were memorable tho:
-There was a man who was an ex Navy Seal who was married to this woman who owned a scrapbooking store. Their hobbies included breaking into Hooters restaurants and stealing things and also their pet snakes who were named like, Hitler and other offensive stuff. The man had a big swastika tattoo on his chest. They decided to go to Atlantic City for vacation. While they were there, they killed some people for fun. Then they cut up the bodies and hid them in various dumpsters and landfills.
-This woman had a bunch of kids and no husband and no money. These parents worked for the circus or something and paid the poor women take care of their two daughters while they were traveling. The woman decided the parents had not paid her enough and grew to hate the two daughters. She especially hated the older daughter because she was pretty. She locked her in the basement and starved her and made the daughter live in filth and made her kids beat her up and put cigarettes out on her. Finally she died. They discovered her and she had the word SLUT carved into her stomach.
THAT SHIT FUCKED UP YO
I watched this show last night called AUTOPSY that originally aired on HBO in the '90s and it was extremely scary and gave me nightmares. Here are 2 stories from it:
-One night, 911 got a call from a traumatized-sounding woman who said she'd heard a woman in her apartment building scream. She said it was the worst noise she'd ever heard in her life, that she'd never heard anything as terrible as that. Then while the cops were going to the apartment, 911 received another call from woman moaning who was clearly dying. They played the original 911 tape and it was awful. They got to the apartment and the woman was dead. Shortly after they arrived, the apartment started burning and it destroyed the apartment building and all the evidence. They showed a photo of the woman's charred body-- she was reaching her hand out.
-A man and a woman were married for 30 years. One day, the man disappeared. They found his car a week later. The wife was very sad, and 10 years after her husband disappeared, she sold the house. The new owners had a termite problem. The termite men were underneath the house, and one of them saw a metal plate nailed to the wall. He pried it open. The plate was hiding a tiny room, and in the tiny room was a skull. The cops came and found a mirror in there, and other decorative items. Turned out the man had a secret room under his house and he used to secretly hang out there and one day he secretly shot himself in it in front of the mirror.