If I'd Had to Take DISD's Art, Music and P.E. Tests, I Would Have Failed

By Stephen Young Fri., Dec. 5 2014 at 6:16 AM

Department of the Interior. Bureau of Indian Affairs. Pierre Agency

These young women would've excelled on the exams, we're sure.

Providing yet another reason for me to be thankful I never have to attend another day of primary school, The Dallas Morning News' Matthew Haag enumerated a little of what's on DISD's controversial exams for elective courses in elementary school Thursday afternoon. They are tough.

The list is littered with stuff I couldn't do now, much less when I was a kid. Kindergarten art students are expected to "[c]reate artworks using a variety of lines, shapes, colors, textures, and forms." Maybe, maybe expecting a 5-year-old to color within the lines is reasonable, but to appropriately use texture? C'mon.

The humiliation I would have felt after failing to make a coherent work of art would have been nothing compared with what would have happened after chubby little 8-year-old Stephen bombed the P.E. assessment of course performance. I would have been expected to "travel independently in a large group while safely and quickly changing speed and direction, demonstrate mature form in skipping, demonstrate balance in symmetrical and non-symmetrical shapes from different basis of support, demonstrate smooth transition from one body part to the next in rolling activities such as log roll, demonstrate on cue key elements of foot dribble." In the last couple of years, I've tripped twice -- that I can remember -- going up the steps on a DART bus. Demonstrate "mature form in skipping?" Nope.

As for the music tests, I would be willing to wager a large sum of money that at least half of you reading this couldn't pass them either. Who among us can "sing with accurate intonation and rhythm, independently?" Has DISD Superintendent Mike Miles ever been to a karaoke night here?

The next time you want to say anything about how kids these days are soft, just be glad you don't have to "demonstrate controlled balance on a variety of objects such as scooters," as DISD fifth-graders are expected to do, any time soon.

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TheCredibleHulk topcommenter

Anyone else remember the Presidential Fitness Awards from back in the day?

TexasPharmD

I had to take a fitness test my senior year of high school for some reason. It wasn't a grade or anything that mattered to me personally so I bombed it. One push up. One sit up. Walked the mile. One jumping jack. I had better things to worry about like college admissions and who I wanted to ask to prom.

noblefurrtexas topcommenter

I flunked Arts and Crafts in grade school. My clay ashtray blew up in the kiln, I was told my finder painting works looked like Rorschach Ink Block Tests, and my grasp of coloration must have been even worse than Ray Charles would have done.

I was great at music and sports, however. But, grade school is a place for evaluation; not final exams that are beyond reasonable.

AeroRazavi

Why not test in these subjects?

If these classes are meant to be freebies, then why offer them?

The testing probably has less to do with the students than it does with the teachers.

Teachers probably mail it in during kindergarten coloring time.

JimSX topcommenter

Don't believe him, folks. After the history exam when the rest of us were sitting there ready to cry, Stephen was the one sitting there with a fake innocent look saying, "Hey, that was a snap, wasn't it?"

Anonymous

Although the art, PE, and music ACP exams are ridiculous and a waste of time, they are not nearly as detrimental to the kids as the core ACP exams. Take a look at the first grade writing ACP and see what you think. Teachers are forced to teach to that inappropriate test instead of an appropriate curriculum because they are evaluated in part by the ACP exam performance.

Parents should hold their kids out of school on ACP test days unless that particular ACP is required for promotion to the next grade. The district will likely back off on ACPs for art, music, and PE, but we'll still be stuck with the awful ACPs for core classes.

ChrisYu

"travel independently in a large group while safely and quickly changing speed and direction," I'm all for any program that prepares the kids for Dallas traffic.

bmarvel topcommenter

@AeroRazavi "Why not test in these subjects?"

Because, Aero, skill in art and music art and even physical adroitness are not equivalent to the ability to read and write and perform basic math. It makes sense to include these in the curriculum -- curriculum studies show that art and music activities have a positive effect on all grades, so hey are not "freebies" -- but no sense to test for them.

noblefurrtexas topcommenter

@JimSX He is now on my enemies list. :)

noblefurrtexas topcommenter

@Anonymous I agree Core ACP course mandates and tests are a disaster. They also place emphasis on many of the wrong things, and especially on theories that liberals seem to embrace, and that's about it. Global Warming is just one of those.

A good friend in the B school at SMU says that teaching and education are - at their base - functions of economics. You have three critical elements; classroom time, student motivation, and curriculum. If you invest in the right things in the right amount, you get good outcomes. If not, you normally get poor outcomes (DISD being a perfect example).

All are subject to "opportunity costs"; the principle function in business that largely determines success or failure. You have a finite supply of land, labor, and capital, according to Adam Smith. (Technology/information was added about forty years ago.) But, TIME is another critical resource every day.)

Spending your time - whether teaching or brokering stocks - in the right amounts for the right functions, then you're generally successful. If not, then you're less successful or not successful at all.