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<s>In bookstores</s> Order online this April.
Just a month after her fiancé, Thomas Eric Duncan, became the only Ebola patient to die of the virus in America, Louise Troh has a book deal about the ordeal. Her memoir, which comes out April 28, will discuss how her faith was "tested but not broken" by his death. Duncan's parents and children reached a settlement for an unknown sum with Texas Health Presbyterian Hospital Wednesday, but Troh was not involved.
Cool.
Senators Mitch McConnell and Harry Reid Surprise No One and Take Top Senate JobsSame old faces, just new job titles.
ISIS May Join Forces With Al QaedaAt least for the time being.
There’s a Pretty Good Chance It Will Snow in NYC TonightIt's not even winter yet.
Here’s What New York Will Look Like in 2018The Manhattan skyline is about to get an update.
The Dallas Ebola Patient’s Fiancée Has a Book DealIn bookstores Order online this April.
Surprise, surprise.
Beirut Cops Can’t Tell Hipsters From JihadisIt's the beards.
The Best Part About Having a Governor for a Dad Is He Can Make Your Drug Charges DisappearMike Beebe has granted over 700 pardons.
Did the Author of Obamacare Admit It’s Evil?Jonathan Gruber needs to stop appearing in secret videos. They're a terrible medium.
Reviewing your timeline, preventing break-ins, and avoiding creepy ads.
GOP Plan to Block Immigration Action Could End in Government ShutdownIf they don’t pass a spending bill by December.
George W. Bush Calls Bill Clinton His ‘Brother From Another Mother’They've been teasing each other on social media.
Supreme Court Allows Same-Sex Marriage in KansasIt’s the 33rd state where gay couples can marry.
Russian Bombers Might Start Flying Patrol Missions Near U.S. BordersWhat, you weren't already having nightmares about World War III?
Porpoise F*cks Himself to DeathAn honorable way to go.
Dallas Ebola Victim’s Family Reaches a Settlement With HospitalThe undisclosed sum will go to his family and to a foundation to fight Ebola in Liberia.
More Than 5,160 Dead From Ebola OutbreakStill no end in sight.
A Brooklyn Photographer Found a Secret ‘Mother Lode’ of Psychedelic Beauty in the Filth of the Gowanus CanalWhat he saw reminds him of the time he took acid and watched a light show.
Too Many Charlie Cooks2014 Charlie Cook versus 2009 Charlie Cook.
Embarrassing.
Two Window Washers Rescued From Scaffolding Dangling From One World Trade CenterFDNY has been dispatched.
Bill de Blasio Late to Memorial Service Because His Boat Got Delayed by FogHate when my boat gets lost.
A Space Probe Just Landed on a Comet the Size of Central ParkDoes this mean we're losing the Space Race?
Gilberto Valle, the So-Called ‘Cannibal Cop,’ Sentenced to Time ServedFor illegally accessing an NYPD database.
Internet Succeeds in Making Alex From Target Afraid to Leave His HouseCongrats, we did it!
NATO Says Russian Troops Are in Ukraine (Again)Russia says they're imagining things.
China Tries to Save Earth; Republicans FuriousThey swore it could never happen.
The Mysterious Owners of Nets.com Have Finally Been RevealedShe's asking $5 million for the site.
School District Renames Christmas Break ‘Winter Break’ Instead of Accommodating Muslim HolidaysHopes no one will notice.
Go wild!
Brawling on the Subway Is the New ‘It’s Showtime, Folks!’Crowded trains are no place for slapping fights.
U.S. Nurses to Strike Today Over Ebola Safety ConcernsHospitals still don't have enough protective equipment for Ebola treatment.
U.S. and China Announce Historic Climate DealWhich is meant to inspire other countries to cut carbon emissions.
A New Yorker’s Guide to Enrolling in Obamacare for 2015You can start signing up for coverage on Saturday.
As First Quarantine Ends, Mali Reports Second Ebola DeathA nurse died after treating a man with Ebola-like symptoms.
New York’s (Former) Ebola Patient Hugs His Way Out of the HospitalAfter 19 days at Bellevue, Dr. Craig Spencer was given a clean bill of health.
Ghost Yelling in Store Walls Turns Out to Be a Real, Live ManThat's why he couldn't just walk through them.
NYPD Searching for a Pair of Armed Robbers in the Diamond District [Updated]A block near Rockefeller Center was shut down.
Palestinian Leader Warns Jerusalem Headed Toward ‘Religious War’What peace talks?
The residents had moved out weeks ago.
Nightmare Guy Mails Ex 15 Baby Chickens to Show Her ‘There Are Lots of Other Chicks Out There’Sounds like they deserved each other.
MTA Deciding Exactly How to Make MetroCards More Expensive, AgainThe agency is considering two fare-hike proposals.
Jonah Lehrer’s First Post-Scandal Book Is Not the One We’ve Been ExpectingNo, this one's on the "Digital Mind."
Girl Pretends to Be Drunk in Public; Men Immediately Try to Take Her HomeThis went pretty much as (sadly) expected.
Man Emerges From Two Years of North Korean Imprisonment With Craving for Papa John’sAnd Starbucks!
Russell Brand Has Written a Populist ManifestoWe read it so you don't have to.
Dear Cyclists, the City Council Is Coming for Your Cell PhonesYou'll have no choice but to upgrade to Google Glass
Glenn Beck Says Mysterious Illness ‘Made Me Look Crazy’He's doing better now, though.
Olive Garden Pasta Pass Hero Successfully Eats $1,840 Worth of Free MealsAnything is possible if you put your stomach to it.