@mcuban

Yeah. Not really.

If we've learned anything this week, it's that net neutrality is the real enemy. Ted Cruz let us know that it's Obamacare for the Internet. Rick Perry sent out a press release saying "President Obama's call to saddle 21st century technology with outdated, unnecessary regulations from the era of the Great Depression is alarming and will stifle innovation and growth." Now, on Thursday, it's Mark Cuban's turn.

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Madison's star shooting guard and Texas A&M commit Admon Gilder.

Dallas ISD has, for the moment at least, put last spring's athletic-recruiting scandal behind it. The 15 coaches and administrators Superintendent Mike Miles fired over the summer have exhausted their appeals. Madison High School's 2012-13 and 2013-14 basketball titles have been vacated. There's a new athletic director and, the district says, a renewed commitment to enforcing state rules ensuring that high school athletes are playing where their supposed to and not changing schools for athletic purposes.

On Tuesday, the UIL District 11-4A Executive Committee turned its attention to the future, namely figuring out if Madison High School's all-state shooting guard and Texas A&M commit Admon Gilder should be eligible to play at Madison during his senior season. Hang with us -- it's complicated.

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Dallas Cowboys

Master of social media.

Sometimes, things are delightful for their simplicity. Cowboys' receiver Cole Beasley's response to a Twitter heckler Sunday was definitely one of those times. Beasley made his first fumble of the year Sunday afternoon against the Jaguars. Twitter user @massot15 thought Beasley needed to know he should hold onto the ball better. Beasley disagreed.

@massot15 eat a dick

— Cole Beasley (@Bease11) November 9, 2014

We all know what happens most of the time, when a -- somewhat in Beasley's case -- famous person says something profane, no matter how deserved, on social media. The tweet or post gets taken down, then the inevitable hacking claims surface.

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Dallas Cowboys

He played! Yay?

London games, at least from the various couches I've watched them on, are always odd. English fans, to their credit, are always enthusiastic, but their cheers are usually half-a-beat off. The extra quarter-of-a-second they need to process what happens on the field, combined with the generally terrible Wembly Stadium pitch and the fact that, assuming you're watching from the U.S., you're seeing a night game on your TV at noon give the whole thing a distinct exhibition vibe.

And here were the Cowboys, losers of two in a row after a league-best 6-1 start, needing to win in that same goofy environment. Tony Romo, he of the two recent back surgeries and two more recent back fractures, for some reason, made the trip. With two broken bones in his back, it was clear -- despite the protestations of Jason Garrett and Jerry Jones -- Romo was going to start Sunday. He wouldn't have made the flight if anyone thought otherwise.

Sure enough, after a rousing rendition of God Save the Queen and the Jaguars' kickoff, there he was, gingerly trotting out onto the muddy field to carry the Cowboys, just as he's done so many times before. What followed wouldn't have been special most days. Sunday though, it was. Romo's mere competence was inspirational.

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Troublesome Spine Man flings the egg.

The Dallas Cowboys, complete with their famous silver trousers, play their first game in London on Sunday. You should tear yourself away from Swansea vs. Arsenal (or as they would call it in America, "Swans - Gooners") and watch a man with a malfunctioning spine attempt to defeat a team that, against all available alphabetical evidence, is pronounced "Jag-wahs." Shortly, I will explain why you might find such a thing compelling, but first, a brief glance at the unfamiliar parts of handegg.

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BY SEAN CHAFFIN
One morning in 2011, just after sunrise, a swarm of federal agents rolled quietly down a neatly manicured cul-de-sac in Southlake, the city police's SWAT alongside them. They gathered outside the home of their target, a $750,000 spread with five bedrooms, five bathrooms and a swimming pool, all sitting on a tree-lined half-acre lot in perhaps Dallas' most idyllic suburb. Around 7, they knocked on the door, and waited.

There was no made-for-TV chaos, no upturned tables or scattering underlings. After a brief wait, the man they were there for, 57-year-old Albert Sidney Reed, approached the door, sleep still in his eyes. He was in his underwear.

Reed's teenage son looking on, police calmly handcuffed their target, and black-clad SWAT officers shuffled inside to sweep the 5,250-square foot house. When the all clear was given several minutes later, Reed was un-cuffed and allowed to dress. He sat in a chair inside for four hours as investigators sifted through his belongings, looking for proof of what they already knew.

About an hour into the search, another IRS agent stumbled across a satchel in Reed's SUV and shuffled through its contents: printouts of wagers, collection notes, business expenses, printouts of how much his betting operation profited during football season, even notes from a big meeting upper-level owners in the organization had recently conducted. Later, he made sure to introduce himself to the satchel's owner.

"I'm Special Agent Mark Parsons with the Internal Revenue Service," he said. "We're investigating the Global International Corporation bookmaking operation, and you and I are going to get to know each other pretty well over the next six months. You can make it good on yourself -- or hard on yourself."

---

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Michael Furrh's shaft officially measures 19 feet, 5 inches, but he tells the ladies it's an even 20.

Everything you need to know about Michael Furrh you can learn from his outgoing voicemail message: Caddie Master at Caddie Club; golf ambassador for Rolling Hills Country Club; Guinness World Record holder.

Hopefully you didn't get bored and hang up, because that last part is key. At Arlington's Rolling Hills Country Club on Monday, Furrh used a 19-foot, 5-inch golf club to drive a ball 89 yards, thus penciling his name in the record book as the human who used the world's "longest usable golf club." We say penciled because records are made to be broken, this one in particular.

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A face even a mother couldn't love.

Here's another reason hockey is my favorite thing.

See also: Our British Texan Falls in Love With the Stars

Hockey has some real pantomime villains. Soccer, sure, there were some bad guys. Luis Suarez, for instance, is very keen on biting people, as you do. He was also suspended for being a racist. Joey Barton tends to spend more time suspended than he does on the field, for a series of petulant misdemeanors. Hockey, however, has the best bad guys of all.

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This picture is worth all of these words.

One of the realities of the salary-cap era in the NFL is that flawed teams can still win Super Bowls. The 2011 Giants lost seven games. The 2012 Ravens lost six, as did the 2010 Packers and the 2007 Giants. If a team can do one thing really, really well, league-promoted parity gives that team a puncher's chance to win the whole damn thing. That's why the Cowboys 6-1 start inspired so much hope. Throughout the six game winning streak that followed Dallas' season-opening loss to the 49ers, the team did one thing, run block, better than any squad in the league.

Over the last two weeks, that hasn't changed. Despite losses to the Redskins and the Cardinals, the Cowboys still block for their halfback better than anyone. They've dropped to 6-3 because the broken transverse processes Tony Romo suffered midway through the third quarter against Washington have upset the fragile balance protecting the rest of the Cowboys from being exposed.

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Cowboys running back Joseph Randle, he of the post-Seattle Seahawks victory underwear theft and subsequent underwear endorsement, had what can best be described as an amusing experience being booked by Frisco police.

See also: Cowboy Joseph Randle Gets an Underwear Endorsement Deal for Stealing Underwear

"This is a cool little publicity stunt though," he says in the first of two videos obtained by KTVT before asking the cop doing his intake if "this was going to be in the papers."

Correctly worried that it would be, Randle tells the officer that he isn't going to look "like a criminal" in his mugshot and asks to see it.

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