Margaret, I hear the fall colors up there in Maine rival the beauty of my spring wild flowers down here in Texas. Well, I find that hard to believe ’cause our wild flowers are mighty pretty. Maybe we’ll have to agree to disagree. But do you know what else I find hard to believe? That Texas could have a Governor more stupid than Rick Perry or even George Bush.
I shudder to think that Tweedle Dee followed Tweedle Dumb in our State Capitol, but this confederacy of dunces is only going to get worse if we elect Greg Abbott this fall. (For those of you who don’t live here, he’s our esteemed Attorney General who is running for Governor against Wendy Davis.)
Yesterday, Abbott argued that the state’s ban on same sex marriage would reduce the number of babies born out of wedlock. Evidently, heterosexuals won’t have unprotected sex as long as Ellen and Portia can’t file jointly in Texas on the off chance they move here. Thank goodness because I had given up on the idea that heterosexuals would ever get on the condom band wagon. Bless his heart. Abbott can’t help being stupid, but he could have stayed home.
You know, my generation remained pretty quiet on the subject of homosexuality – mainly because we didn’t talk about such things. But, if truth be known, most of us probably were fine with the idea. What a shame we remained quiet as I am sure there were a lot of heterosexual marriages that would have been a great deal happier if they had not included a closeted homosexual in the union.
So why am I speaking up now? Well, I found out a few years ago that Margaret has a gay nephew and more recently that I have a gay grandson. So maybe it’s time I stopped letting social etiquette stand in the way of civil rights.
Mr. Abbott, you are a hate filled idiot who is about as useful as a milk bucket under a bull. The only thing that will reduce the number of babies born out of wedlock is comprehensive sex education in our schools. Clearly whatever you were taught is for shit if you think there is any correlation between same sex marriage and unplanned pregnancies. And for the record, if you have an issue with gay marriage, don’t get married to a gay person.
And if you don’t want another idiot as Governor of Texas, don’t vote for Greg Abbott. Vote for Wendy Davis. She knows where babies come from. I mean it. Really.
Just wondering how many Texans won’t vote for Greg Abbott because he married a Latina…..Any racists out there.
By: uawtradesman on October 28, 2014
at 7:34 AM
You go, Co Blu –
I’ll definitely be out there, at least canceling out my husband’s inevitable Republican votes. What can I say…? Twenty years together, and no political cohesion whatsoever… But we live in CT, traditionally a blue state, so I have an advantage here. He endures it. Gotta love him for that.
Thanks for posting. Maybe the porch ain’t quite dead yet!
Gato
By: gatodicima on October 27, 2014
at 5:35 PM
You ladies are a goddamn national treasure. One of these days Imma put a tribute up to you on http://www.thewomeniread.com. Of all the women I read, I just might like you best!
By: amycwallace on October 27, 2014
at 5:05 PM
If you don’t vote, you will give this country and our freedoms to The Koch Brothers who are ready to see their dream of being the Puppet Masters come to fruition. Who do you think has financed the ignorant campaigns of Republican politicians in every state in this country? The Koch brothers own the Repub party. If you throw away your ballot or don’t go to the polls, you are throwing away this country and any rights you now enjoy. The Koch brothers want you poor, ignorant and afraid. Don’t let that happen. Vote Democratic. Offer a neighbor or friend a ride to the polls, encourage your neighbors and friends to mark their mail in ballots and send them in . Is saving the cost of a stamp by not voting or not wanting to deal with lines at the polls worth more than losing everything we have fought for in this country to two billionaires whose heritage is steeped in hate for anyone “beneath” them ??
Vote early.
By: CO BLU on October 27, 2014
at 12:41 PM
[…] Helen Philpot would like for someone to explain to Greg Abbott where babies come from. […]
By: Texas blog roundup for the week of October 20 – Off the Kuff on October 23, 2014
at 4:45 AM
@Sonia and others. There is a “Donate” button. The money goes to Matthew, her grandson, so he can maintain, manage and grow the site. Look at the “Support M&H” tab. Writing like this deserves to be supported.
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at 8:29 AM
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By: bmw 3 series on October 21, 2014
at 2:36 AM
Margaret and Helen – as a straight heterosexual man, I LOVE you!
By: Les Roberts on October 20, 2014
at 3:46 PM
Excellent column, as usual. You know, I’ve never met a Texan – in person – who I didn’t like, but I must just be meeting the sane ones. I live in New Mexico, where we say, “Poor New Mexico; so far from heaven, so close to Texas”.
But states get the politicians they deserve by voting against their own interests, which is what will happen in Texas when they vote Greg Abbott into office. Which they will, because Democrats will stay home in sufficient numbers to give the governorship to a nutty Republican, once again. I really despair when I look at who votes in midterms…and who doesn’t.
By: phoebes in Santa Fe on October 20, 2014
at 9:05 AM
[…] Helen Philpot would like for someone to explain to Greg Abbott where babies come from. […]
By: Eye on Williamson » TPA Blog Round Up (October 20, 2014) on October 20, 2014
at 8:51 AM
I agree, it is harder to imagine someone more stupid than Rick Perry but apparently he’s out there. Thank you for speaking up with wit and wisdom.
By: holly@yakkityyaktalkingback.com on October 19, 2014
at 8:50 AM
So agree with you!
By: Cher on October 18, 2014
at 11:14 PM
Love this! So very true, very true. Hope Wendy wins.
By: Anonymous on October 18, 2014
at 11:13 PM
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By: cartier love bracelet on October 18, 2014
at 6:48 PM
Thanks as always Helen! Enjoyed the post. Wishing the best for Wendy in Texas. I know in my red State, only the rare democratic candidate stands any chance to being elevated to elective office. It is baffling but true.
By: Easier on October 18, 2014
at 5:25 PM
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at 1:13 AM
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By: ena.vu on October 17, 2014
at 6:38 PM
You are a whisper of fresh air, keep it up!
By: Pat on October 17, 2014
at 1:06 PM
subpoenaing—–oops
By: uawtradesman on October 17, 2014
at 7:42 AM
What’s next for Texas??????? Subpoeing pastors sermons!!!!! OH!!!! That’s already happened…….Damn Liberals
By: uawtradesman on October 17, 2014
at 7:41 AM
“Laura Ingraham
Question to “hero” St. Sen. Wendy Davis: Which kids that you see on the playground shouldn’t be there?”
By: uawtradesman on October 17, 2014
at 7:29 AM
Did you see this one?
By: Kay Brewer on October 16, 2014
at 5:01 PM
‘Splaining it to him will do no good.
By: georgiecat on October 16, 2014
at 7:12 AM
Oh, Valentine. I love your photo! So stylish! Thank you for your comments. An enjoyable read.
By: Mickey on October 15, 2014
at 12:55 PM
Thank you, Helen. Good to hear from you! Go Wendy and GO VOTE!
By: jmatt on October 15, 2014
at 11:29 AM
As a third generation Texan I am continually hanging my head and mumbling apologies for all the stupid coming out of this state.
By: Valentine Logar on October 15, 2014
at 7:58 AM
Hi, Gayle – Hang on to your snark!
Absurd, ridiculous, untrue, and totally unfounded “statements” and “facts” MUST be called out as the trash they are. We must not let ourselves be persuaded (even by supposedly well-meaning “friends”) that everyone is allowed to have his/her “opinion” stand unchallenged, ESPECIALLY when that person plans to use that “opinion” as the basis for making LAWS.
“Banning same sex marriage will help reduce out-of-wedlock pregnancies” does NOT have the same validity as “Sex education in schools will help reduce out-of-wedlock pregnancies.” “Climate change is a hoax because it’s snowing today” is NOT the same as “Climate change is a serious problem because the polar ice caps are melting at an unprecedented rate.” “Ebola is a threat because Obama messes up everything” is NOT the same as “The cuts in funding for the CDC and the NIH have seriously hampered our ability to respond to the outbreak as well as we could have without those cuts.”
IMO, there is just no moral place for “being nice” when presented with absolute, and dangerous, BULL DOODY! And every time we treat that doody as something other than what it is – and let it stand unchallenged – we allow ourselves to be brought closer and closer to living under national “policy” based on it.
When the emperor actually has no “new clothes,” and is standing there stark naked like an idiot, we’d better emulate that five-year-old who called it out… Lest NONE of us have any clothes. And that’s what we would deserve.
“I mean it. Really.”
Gato
By: gatodicima on October 15, 2014
at 7:47 AM
Another terrific post. My sympathies — do all the dopes in Texas run for office?
We have some jacki here in New England, but they become “famous” by picketing women’s clinics. Everyone knows they are jerks, and volunteers escort patients when the picketers come out.
I’m one of the fortunate ones; I just got married and had my babies. I spent their early years with the kids and returned to my career. A detour, not a block.
By: l'empress on October 15, 2014
at 6:23 AM
Just when I ALMOST convince myself that I’ll try to change my ways because some of my “friends” accuse me of being “snarky” about serious matters, along comes Helen to remind me that sometimes there is NO other path to reach the point without being snarky. Ah … it’s as liberating as burning my bra to be allowed to swing it (or them) whichever way I please.
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at 2:41 AM
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at 1:08 AM
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By: http://kuleama.wordpress.com/ on October 14, 2014
at 7:19 PM
Helen, you make my heart sing.
By: oldgrumpysteve on October 14, 2014
at 6:48 PM
[…] wagon. Bless his heart. Abbott can’t help being stupid, but he could have stayed home. More at http://margaretandhelen.com/2014/10/14/someone-needs-to-tell-greg-abbott-where-babies-come-from/ 0 Replies GA_googleFillSlot("a2kTopicLeaderboardEnd"); […]
By: Ebola in The USA - Page 20 on October 14, 2014
at 6:43 PM
Helen you are a blessing to the State of Texas! And as for the politicians we’ve been blessed with for the last few years, why Abbott has such a king complex I’m amazed he doesn’t ride around on a golden throne. Those people he has surrounding him in his commercials must have recently been sanitized for his protection (just like the wrapped silverware we get at Chuy’s!). And as for his position on gay marriage, equal pay for women, and a woman’s right to choose, well now just don’t even get me started because those little bitty things aren’t important to him! And he’s still trying to make sure that minorities have a harder time voting with his silly voter ID law. Helen, I hope I’m not mad on election day, I really do.
By: Hopeful in Houston on October 14, 2014
at 6:24 PM
Helen, I love you.
By: Arthur Curtis on October 14, 2014
at 5:59 PM
Oh, Helen….I just love you. I get all kinds of excited when I see mail from you in my in box. And I can vouch for Margaret’s amazing autumn color, having just returned from two stupendously lazy weeks sitting on a rock called Deer Isle in Downeast Maine. It was spectacularly beautiful this year. Anyway, I adore how you write. It reminds me of Molly Ivins, rest her liberal Texan soul. And Ann “stick a fork in him–he’s done” Richards. Nice company to be in, Helen.
Just wanted to tell you what a day brightener you are. Thank you for writing…..Jan Knox
DON’T POSTPONE JOY
By: Janice Knox on October 14, 2014
at 5:03 PM
Ladies, you are right on! Abbott is a useless wad of DNA!
Go Wendy!
By: mageen in old virginny on October 14, 2014
at 3:18 PM
they are great, very worried about the over all election…
By: Marian Kurz on October 14, 2014
at 3:09 PM
OH, you are the ONE!! ‘They’ are totally amazing, as in I am amazed they can say those things with a straight face!! OK, what I would like to say can’t’ be printed in a nice blog like yours :)
By: Susan on October 14, 2014
at 12:47 PM
Both of you should be eventually put in the smithsonian institute. You are priceless.
By: Skeets FRIEDKIN on October 14, 2014
at 12:42 PM
Well said, for sure.
By: phyllisronyoshida . on October 14, 2014
at 12:31 PM
Amen
By: Andrew Gault on October 14, 2014
at 11:28 AM
Helen, wonderful as usual. I truly hope that the sane Texans get out and vote for Wendy, else your string of stupid mental midget, but sticky fingered, male governors will continue! Not sure Texas will survive Abbott after Perry.
GO WENDY! Love you Helen.
By: 1smartcanerican™ on October 14, 2014
at 11:08 AM
Oh Helen, how you always manage to hit the nail on the head. Don’t stop, write more often.
By: Linda Sanders on October 14, 2014
at 10:42 AM
Oh Helen, how I love your blogs. You always seem to nail it, and so subtly! Please, write more often!
By: Linda Sanders on October 14, 2014
at 10:41 AM
Oh, pshaw. I see from someone who left a comment, Helen, you meant ‘comprehensive’, and I loved her saying that compressive sex ed sounds painful. Thank you both!
By: Mickey on October 14, 2014
at 10:35 AM
Oh, rats. Another typo! I meant ‘retire’ and wrote ‘retired’ which is stuck in my brain because I am retired!
By: Mickey on October 14, 2014
at 10:32 AM
Whoops, Helen. You wrote ‘compressive’ sex education (??!!). I think you might have meant ‘compulsory’? That’s okay. I understood what you meant. And right on about Mr. Abbott. I live in Arizona which with McCain as a U.S. Senator is definitely no brag. Sigh. Why won’t that man just retired and shut the hell up?! Thank you for your lovely blog. Be safe.
By: Mickey on October 14, 2014
at 10:30 AM
Reblogged this on risquédivorcée and commented:
I know that I usually write about sex & dating more than politics, but this is about love, sex, dating, marriage, sex education, safe sex, responsibility, acceptance and civil rights – all really important and current stuff!
Be educated. Be kind. Vote.
By: risquedivorcee on October 14, 2014
at 10:22 AM
Well said! I don’t live in Texas, but…WENDY DAVIS FOR GOVERNOR!
By: CJ on October 14, 2014
at 9:55 AM
Ditto on “comprehensive,” but that doesn’t negate the message!!!!
By: mimi on October 14, 2014
at 9:50 AM
Well. Greg knows where the MONEY come from. And that’s important for Texas conservatives.Say the word “money” where he can hear it, and he gets that goofy grin on his face. He’s limited mentally. But he’s focused on money.
By: Anonymous on October 14, 2014
at 9:47 AM
You are wonderful, a joy to read both for your smarts, your tolerance of others (not just on the topic of gay marriage) and the wonderful biting humor you bring to serious social issues.
Abbott makes me cringe because if TX elects him, it speaks poorly for the collective intellect of Texas voters. Imagine how stupid they will vote at the federal level.
By: Anonymous on October 14, 2014
at 9:47 AM
On the good side, Austin City Limits just had its 40th anniversary and Texas leads the nation in wind energy (not the politician produced) with almost 10% of its energy provided by that renewable source. But, don’t tell anyone as the Governor would hate for that story to get out. As an outsider, I like Wendy Davis’s chutzpah wearing her running shoes to filibuster. Yet, the other big filibuster guy who shut down the US government talked for 21 hours against Obamacare and did not once mention Texas was dead last by having the highest percentage of uninsureds (and still is, even worse than Puerto Rico). Expanding Medicaid would help so many of the Lone Star folks without. BTG
By: btg5885 on October 14, 2014
at 9:45 AM
The Republican’s “understanding” of where babies come from and who homosexual people are (“We’re not against gays, just they’re behavior.” – GIVE ME A FREAKING BREAK!!!) is akin to the understanding Sarah Palin has for brain surgery or how close Russia is to her house. How and why people vote for them is beyond my comprehension. Thanks for always telling it like it is. I mean it, really.
By: Debra Lynn Shelton on October 14, 2014
at 9:13 AM
Girl its really hard to love Texas in my old age when its been taken over like The Goon Squad. Keep writing as I love your rants.
By: Jo Ann Nicholas on October 14, 2014
at 8:44 AM
Helen, I hear ya, but I’m pretty sure you mean to advocate comprehensive sex ed, not compressive sex ed, which sounds like it would be very painful.
By: Donna on October 14, 2014
at 8:22 AM
BRAVO!
By: Teacher on October 14, 2014
at 8:19 AM
It’s always wonderful to hear your distinctive, smart voice! And I feel for you, having a moron like Abbott running for Gov!
By: Rebecca Mashaw on October 14, 2014
at 8:15 AM
Don’t feel too bad, Helen. Here in Virginia, we had an Attorney General who thought that a woman seeking an abortion needed to have a periscope shoved up her uterus because clearly she didn’t realize that the procedure had anything to do with a fetus. Luckily when this shit for brains ran for Governor, we didn’t elect him, but it was close. Hopefully, the good people of Texas will turn out and elect Wendy. Praying for you.
By: Deb on October 14, 2014
at 8:12 AM
Hahaha! The Republican party thinks they’ve gotten rid of the wing nuts for this election cycle…WRONG!
By: dawnbmoore on October 14, 2014
at 8:09 AM
I love Helen and if I were homosexual, I’d ask her to marry me:)
By: Anonymous on October 14, 2014
at 7:52 AM
So good to hear from you. Wondering why Texans are so concerned about babies being born out of wedlock, and what homosexuality has to do with it. I wish Texas would remember it’s 2014, not 1914! They have already given us Ted Cruz, haven’t we suffered enough?
By: Terri in NY on October 14, 2014
at 7:51 AM