In the style of a typical 1950’s horror “B” movie, the fantasy creators of FOX and the right-wing blogosphere bring you yet another tale of fear and loathing to give their scarecrow audiences more crap to justify their belief that a brain is just another tool of the liberal socialist agenda. 

More frightening than a Rick Perry presidency

If you thought that creating cheesy plots used by hackneyed movie Director wannabes is a dying art you will be sorely disappointed.  From people not unlike those who gave us the 1958 easily forgotten horror film, “I Bury the Dead” which spoke of “terror, spawned in the hellish unknown” and gave us “scenes to make the skin crawl” and “shocks that challenge the imagination” comes another unbelievable tale that only the mindless can fathom and put out for public consumption.  If you thought that there was no longer an audience for such tripe either, you will also be sorely disappointed.

From the makers who gave us Nevada rancher Clive Bundy and reality TV holy man Phil Robertson comes another comic book character that will save us from “drowning in our own blood.”  His name is Gary Painter, sheriff of Midland County in far west Texas.  A man who the Midland County website refers to as “a born leader of men”.  And gauging from the feigned gasps from FOX’s newest blond broadcaster,  Elisabeth Hasselbeck,  this white-hatted Bob Steele imitation from the drought stricken state is going to save us all from – wait for it – the ISIS terror on the border.  SHRIEK!

Sheesh!   Now I see why Obama insists on calling it ISIL

Hasselbeck as you may remember replaced the other blond ditz of Fox & Friends, Gretchen “pepper spray an 8-year old” Carlson.  In her interview with Sheriff Painter, Hasslebeck, to no one’s surprise, ignores one of the primary rules of good journalism – objectivity.

“Are you saying that ISIS is ready to come across poised to perhaps execute what they have threatened to do, attacks on the United States, drown us in our own blood?” Hasselbeck asked. “Is that what you’re saying?”

“I’m saying the border is wide open,” Painter replied. “We have found copies, or people along the border, have found Muslim clothing, they have found Quran books that are laying on the side of the trail. So we know that there are Muslims that have come across, have been smuggled in the United States.”

Hasselbeck agreed with Painter’s dire prediction and asked what he thought the U.S. should do.
“If they show their ugly head in our area, we’ll send them to hell,” Painter said. “I think the United States needs to get busy and they need to bomb them. They need to take them out. I would like for them to hit them so hard and so often that every time they hear a propeller on a plane or a jet aircraft engine that they urinate down both legs.”    SOURCE

Muslim fundamentalists have left their Qurans “laying on the side of the trail”??   Highly unlikely unless they found something equally absurd to enhance their deceit, like maybe the King James version of the Bible.

But clearly I have gotten ahead of myself because you are already asking yourself , “Wait! What?  ISIS terrorists are coming across our southern border?”  Yes I know.  Where have we all been if we didn’t know this?  The logical answer is that we’ve been reading and watching other sources of information that usually do a better job of reporting reliable facts.  So where did the notion that ISIS was slipping across the Rio Grande come from?

It appears to have all started with the self-proclaimed legal watchdog, Judicial Watch whose blog creed states “Because no one is above the law”.  Clearly however, JW has no problem with being deceitful.

Islamic terrorist groups are operating in the Mexican border city of Ciudad Juarez and planning to attack the United States with car bombs or other vehicle borne improvised explosive devices (VBIED). High-level federal law enforcement, intelligence and other sources have confirmed to Judicial Watch that a warning bulletin for an imminent terrorist attack on the border has been issued. Agents across a number of Homeland Security, Justice and Defense agencies have all been placed on alert and instructed to aggressively work all possible leads and sources concerning this imminent terrorist threat.  SOURCE

This appears to all be based on evidence from dubious unnamed “government sources and intelligence officials.”   But to the chagrin of all of those who may have already crapped their pants over this, “Department of Homeland Security officials said that there is no credible evidence that members of the Islamic militant group plan to use the border to enter the U.S.”

Well, case closed then, right?  Ha, how little some of you know how doggedly determined right-wing extremists are to shove a square peg through a round hole.  Shortly after it looked like the conservative JW “alert” was going to go down in flames, in steps the creators of more than one fantasy about liberal elites, Breitbart Blog.   It’s branch in Texas not only takes up the same specious scenario created by JW but now has even further “documented” evidence that high alert status has been issued to our men and women protecting our border.  Here’s a picture of that document.

This blurry image I’m afraid is all there is.   Breitbart obviously didn’t want to give too much away here to protect its sources.   Either that or they wanted to make sure that their gullible readers wouldn’t concern themselves with a few minor details that makes the document a farce.  First, even though the “author” and the “source” of the document is allegedly from the Texas Dept. of Public Safety Intelligence and Counterterrorism Div/Joint Intelligence Operations Center, it’s clearly not a document from any legal agency.  I am sure the header on the top of the page identifies its source from the same people who rubber-stamped in red ink, Breitbart Texas across the page.

Second, as Breitbart Texas tells us “The document attributed the increased interest by ISIS to a report done by journalist James O’Keefe. (JOURNALIST!!!  Give me a fucking break)   Though the report did not mention O’Keefe by name, it showed images of O’Keefe crossing the porous Texas-Mexico border while wearing an Osama bin Laden mask. “

Now if the name James O’Keefe sounds familiar to you, it’s because he was the same clown that dressed up in a pimp suit and took associate conservative activist Hannah Giles dressed as a hooker into a Philadelphia ACORN office to discredit the agency that had registered black voters prior to Barack Obama’s 2008 election win.  It was discovered later after the videos O’Keefe and Giles had made in various ACORN offices across the country that they “were ‘heavily edited’ to present material out of context and create a misleading impression of activities.”

O’Keefe was also later found guilty of “a single misdemeanor count of entering a federal building under false pretenses” when he and three other impersonators posed as telephone repairmen to bug the phones at Senator Mary Landrieu’s office in New Orleans.  O’Keefe felt that Landrieu ”was ignoring phone calls from constituents during the debate over President Barack Obama’s health care bill.”

Then there was O’Keefe’s association along with Andrew Beirtbart with a white supremacist group  and his attempt at  another ACORN-style prank by calling Planned Parenthood offices “explaining his willingness to make donations as long as the money was earmarked to abort African American fetuses”.  Jimmy, you are a bad, bad boy.

O’Keefe must have a fetish for costumes too.  I laugh out loud at the thought of him “crossing the porous Texas-Mexico border while wearing an Osama bin Laden mask”.   The border may have its weak spots but does anyone think that the built-up 21,000 man border patrol is not going to position themselves in the vulnerable spots where crossing the Rio Grande is the easiest as opposed to areas where people risk their lives crossing at deeper depths and where currents can drag them under.  I suspect, based on O’Keefe’s other doctored videos of ACORN, that where it appears he is crossing a section of the Rio Grande, is more likely  an area along the Nueces River which sits inside Texas and its closest point at Crystal City is about 100 miles from the Rio Grande.

There are many who still question the validity of Darwin’s theory of evolution.   Many I suspect watch FOX and read blogs similar to Breitbart’s.  So next time when people suggest that man has not evolved from apes because we have yet to witness such a transformation in our time I would merely suggest that maybe we have and some have names like Cliven Bundy, Phil Robertson and Sheriff Gary Painter.

To paraphrase Shakespeare:  All of the world’s a stage and the men and women its players.  Some of these play the role of buffoon while most others are simply bit characters following the lead of the buffoons.  Sadly they find their way through the entrances to the stage easier than they can find the exits

This post was inspired by the article at Think Progress entitled – Texas Sheriff Claims ‘Quran Books’ Found At Mexican Border May Mean ISIS Infiltration