You may have heard that New York City has a totally awesome new official explainer.
She moved to town only a few months ago and seems to spend a lot of time traveling, but she’s still managed to learn a lot about this crazy place, and she is eager to share it with you.
Her name is Taylor Swift, and in a video posted by the city’s tourism office this week, she talks the viewer through some basic New York City vocabulary words.
Without stumbling too much, and game the whole time, Ms. Swift explains what a bodega is, and how to pronounce Houston Street, and the difference between a stoop and a porch.
City Room managed track down some imaginary outtakes from the shoot and is proud to present some vocabulary lessons from Ms. Swift that you won’t hear anywhere else:
• Knish: “‘Nish.’ Oops. Sorry. My Jewish friends say the K is not silent, so it’s Ka-nish. All I know (ha! the K is silent there!) is that it’s made of potatoes, comes in different shapes but is 100 percent kosher kool!”
• Stop ‘n’ Frisk: “A lot of towns have these places called Stop & Shop, which is like a supermarket? Stop ‘n’ Frisk is sort of like the reverse — instead of you stopping in and asking where the chewing gum is, someone else will stop you and ask you if you have any chewing gum. Remember, New Yorkers are courteous, so it’s rude to say no!”
• Dumbo: “It’s a neighborhood in Brooklyn. Don’t worry if someone says, ‘I live in Dumbo.’ It doesn’t mean she’s been swallowed by an elephant. That would be terrible! P.S. My neighborhood is called TriBeCa. I love it because my neighbors are super-friendly and there’s tons of bodegas!”
• Chinatown: “In places like San Francisco or Houston — that’s Houston the city, not the street — there’s only one Chinatown. But in New York, did you know there are actually three Chinatowns? I know! Where do all the Chinese people come from?”
• Affordable housing: “You remember what you paid for your three-bedroom house back home? Now, double that figure. Add four zeros. Deduct the last three digits from your Social Security number, multiply the result by three and add that. Don’t ask me about ‘key money!’”
• Hedge Fund: “Depending on your neighborhood, it could mean money you set aside to buy a little bush to put on your fire escape, or it could be a thing you have to manage in order to be able to live in ‘affordable housing.’”
• Daggering: “It’s like twerking, only Jamaican style! Ya mon! Shake it off!”
• “You all know how much I love ‘Red.’ But I don’t like when people use ‘Red’ for evil, like the Communists. Which brings me to something New Yorkers call Bad Elmo …
• “Can I help you?”: “Get lost, buddy!!”
Perhaps there are some New York City terms you have always wondered about. If you would like to see Ms. Swift define them, or suggest a script for her, please put them in the comments or on Twitter using @nytmetro.
We bet she’ll do her best, because New Yorkers are can-do people.
Thanks!